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Robinhood: Difference between revisions

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Sometime [[Last Thursday]] reddit users on r/WallStreetBets ("WSB") decided to troll Wall Street Billionaires in such a way to put [[Is This Battletoads|Battletoads]] to shame.
Sometime [[Last Thursday]],  [[Reddit]] users on r/WallStreetBets ("WSB") decided to troll Wall Street Billionaires in such a way to put [[Is This Battletoads|Battletoads]] to shame.


How?  By kicking the sad saps that were milking them and drinking their blood;
How?  By kicking the sad saps that were [[milkers|milking]] them and [[vampires|drinking their blood]]:


(1) Buy a shitload of Gamestop, AMC, and other under-performing stocks.
1. Buy a shitload of Gamestop, AMC, and other under-performing stocks.


(2) Thereby screwing the short bets that these stocks would dive, and causingg about 70 Billion USA Dollars from whale investors and hedgies to evaporate.
2. Thereby screwing the short bets that these stocks would dive, and causingg about 70 Billion USA Dollars from whale investors and hedgies to evaporate.


(3) ????
3. ????


(4) Profit
4. PROFIT


What resulted was massive [[butthurt]] from Companies that owned a piece of Robinhood.  So what did Robinhood do?  Limit trading to only selling, thereby limiting their Jew-y Masters' losses.
What resulted was massive [[butthurt]] from Companies that owned a piece of Robinhood.  So what did Robinhood do?  Limit trading to only selling, thereby limiting their Jew-y Masters' losses.


But the fight is not over.  By using collective powers of [[autism]], retards of Reddit shall pump those stocks to the moon...and sell them only when the hedgies switch their bets to the long term.
But the fight is not over.  By using collective powers of [[autism]], retards of Reddit shall pump those stocks to the moon...and sell them only when the hedgies switch their bets to the long term.


==With apologies to Balzac==
==With apologies to Balzac==

Revision as of 10:31, 30 January 2021

Steal from the Poor and give to the Rich

Robinhood Markets, Inc. is an American (((financial services company))) headquartered in Menlo Park, California. Robinhood is a scam, in league with the U.S. Scam and Insider Trading Commission, and is also a member of the illuminati. The company's revenue comes from three main sources: selling retards' information so hedgies can bet against them (a practice for which SEC opened a probe into the company in September 2020), investments from Melvin/Citadel, and margin lending.


OMFG ROBIN HOOD IS A SCAM SELLING RETARDS' DATA TO HEDGIES

Despite knowing for a while that Robinhood was a scam setup to harvest "retail investor data" to hedge funds so they can bet against their own users, retards (yes, that's what they call themselves) kept using Robinhood instead of other options like Fidelity and Webull. This would lead in part to the GameStop short squeeze.


GME TO THE MOON

Sometime Last Thursday, Reddit users on r/WallStreetBets ("WSB") decided to troll Wall Street Billionaires in such a way to put Battletoads to shame.

How? By kicking the sad saps that were milking them and drinking their blood:

1. Buy a shitload of Gamestop, AMC, and other under-performing stocks.

2. Thereby screwing the short bets that these stocks would dive, and causingg about 70 Billion USA Dollars from whale investors and hedgies to evaporate.

3. ????

4. PROFIT

What resulted was massive butthurt from Companies that owned a piece of Robinhood. So what did Robinhood do? Limit trading to only selling, thereby limiting their Jew-y Masters' losses.

But the fight is not over. By using collective powers of autism, retards of Reddit shall pump those stocks to the moon...and sell them only when the hedgies switch their bets to the long term.

With apologies to Balzac

Still confused about how short sales work? Please see this tutorial:


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