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A hot issue in the realm of [[pop parenting]], homeschooling is where some unfortunate child's parents get the idea in their head that they are more qualified than a <s>trained teacher</s> uncaring middle aged asshole who barely passed college by sucking their professor's [[cock]] to educate their child, usually because the public school system will not indoctrinate said child with their [[fundie]] beliefs. For more information, see {{ljcomm|homeschooling}}.
==Origins of Homeschooling==
==Origins of Homeschooling==
Homeschooling began as a way for evolution denying, vaccine hating Hillary supporters to ensure their children would never have friends, healthy relationships or a proper social life. Because pure evil plays such a central role in homeschooling, it is commonly accepted that their numbers are increased primarily by converting unaware victims through the drainage of blood, much like vampires. However, many brave teens have dedicated their legacies to showing the homeschoolers the light side of the education system, by committing mass shootings. Homeschooled children are the scum of the earth, and are thoroughly recommended to kill themselves.
Homeschooling began as a way for parents to escape the school system.
==Why People Choose Homeschooling==
==Why People Choose Homeschooling==
Parents generally feel the school system is ill equipped to explain to their child why the world is still flat, or why [[Internet_Humanitarianism|working for the benefit of mankind]] is cooler than [[drugs]] and [[sex]]. Some of them even go and get degrees so they can better assure the rest of the world that it is flat, and that anyone who disagrees with them is a [[fag]] anyhow.
Parents generally feel the school system is ill equipped to explain to their child basic real world problems.
==Pros==
==Pros==
*More time for the internet when your coked up "teacher" isn't looking
*More time for the internet
*[[Child Abuse]]
*Vidya
*Never being let out of your house
*Compared to [[school|public school]], the education you can get from [[parents|your_mom]] can be a lot better, assuming that they aren't underqualified.
*Compared to [[school|public school]], the education you can get from [[parents|your_mom]] can be a lot better, assuming that they aren't [[aspie|underqualified]].
*Homeschooled students are not subject to the testing requirements of the No Child Left Behind Act.
*[[Incest|Sex Ed Class]]
==Cons==
==Cons==
*"[[lol_wut|We don't believe in dinosaurs]]"
*"We want our children to grow up thinking balanced and rationally, reciting Pi to the 108th digit every morning and doing his cube root exercises at bedtime"
*All homeschooled characters start off with 1 in charisma, and pay double point cost for any and all [[no life|social skills]].
*"I wasn't worried about Becky's education till I went to her school and saw just how many [[Islam|MOOSLEMS]] were there."
*"We want our children to grow up [[drone|thinking balanced and rationally]], reciting Pi to the 108th digit every morning and doing his [[time cube|cube root exercises]] at bedtime"
*[[Conservapedia]]
*[[SAT|You still have to take the fucking SAT]] to get into [[college]].
*[[Andy Schlafly]]
* Your parents micromanage your life.
* Because of this, homeschool kids are [[over 9000]] times more likely to become [[drug|druggie]] hedonists when they get to [[college]] and finally have some freedom. Those who don't will spend the entire time studying and having no life, thereby missing out on the best parts of [[college]].
== See Also ==
*[[School]]
*[[Private School]]
*[[Pedophilia]]
*[[Creationist]]
*[[Sick fuck]]
*[[Daniellehedgehog]]
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[[Category:Drama-generating techniques]]
[[Category:Drama-generating techniques]]
Revision as of 11:53, 4 January 2017
PROTIP: The 7 year old child is fictional.PROTIP: The 7 year old child is still fictional.Wiccan advice for furry homeschooling.
Homeschooling began as a way for parents to escape the school system.
Why People Choose Homeschooling
Parents generally feel the school system is ill equipped to explain to their child basic real world problems.
Pros
More time for the internet
Vidya
Compared to public school, the education you can get from your_mom can be a lot better, assuming that they aren't underqualified.
Cons
"We want our children to grow up thinking balanced and rationally, reciting Pi to the 108th digit every morning and doing his cube root exercises at bedtime"
