Victor And Valentino

Victor and Valentino is another craptastic steaming pile from the cable TV brain trust that calls itself Cartoon Network, that seeks to rip off The X-Files every chance it gets while looking to integrate Spanish culture into American children's acceptance, much in the same way that Blacks gained the foothold of acceptance through TV shows like The Jeffersons Fat Albert and the saturation of Rap music on all the air waves.

Taking its cues from earlier shows like Dora the Explorer, it looks to normalize Spanish culture by exposing American children to the Spanish language and by pretending that Spanish immigrants are upstanding, law abiding people like any random white family tapping the booming Hispanic demographic that will, within a generation, render white children a marginal minority.

Its' whole goal is to portray Spanish families as being equal to white ones while pushing the idea that children are the same no matter where you go, despite the fact that, statistically, white children have a lesser chance of working for a large Mexican drug cartel as compared to the two Beaner main characters, or for that matter, most of the shows' characters.

Plot

A cross between Scooby-Doo and The X-Files. Two Mexican children chase after ghosts and monsters, mostly from Spanish culture or having Spanish names like La Chupacabra, that are mostly more cute than scary while sneaking in it's agenda of normalizing Spanish immigration into the US by showing the main characters of Victor and Valentino as decent, hard working and capable of learning lessons from the morality plays that it pushes or as a way to convince young Americans that Mexicans aren't the murderous drug dealers that the news and reality proves that they are.

Characters

Name	Description	picture
Victor	Full name, Victor Guadalupe Morena Laguna Calaca Calavera. The douchebag of the duo of Victor and Valentino that serves as the creator, Diego Molano's Mary Sue because Molano voices Victor's character as well. He is opportunistic, cheats at games and not above stealing from his family if it means money for him to play video games. Most likely will be in a street gang by the time he is 13 or be deported after a prison stint because he was caught smuggling cocaine into the US. Victoria's whole role on the show is to put the duo into bad situations so there will be an opportunity to teach a lesson. More loyal to himself than anyone else, he is supposed to be that classic bad-boy that can turn any girls' panties into a wet-nap. Probably the most abrasive of the two. Half-Brother to Valentino.
Valentino	The fat, moralfag, goody-two-shoes character that is intended to represent you and finishes off the duo of Victor and Valentino. The writing of the two characters follows the idea of the characterization of Thor and Loki in that, what one is missing the other makes up for it ensuring that, together, Victor and Valentino make up a decent person. Valentino is meant to be the more rational of the two and serves as the teacher of the show in that he explains the monsters and speaks Spanish for the viewer - as Victor knows nothing about either. He is Victor's half brother and lives together with him with their grandmother because, probably, their parents jumped the border or were killed by the Mexican cartel - as no mention is made of where they are at. Despite his girth, he is often shown as being nimble and good at sports in contrast to Victor being clumsier than him.
Charlene	Pronounced Char-Lean. The Creepy girl of the neighborhood that Schlicks to the thought of Victor. Mostly serves as a set-up to an episode, much like Victor and Valentino's grandmother, in that it is Charlene that gives Victor and Valentino a cursed game just for shits and giggles or seeks to test Victor's bravery in a supposed haunted house as a ploy to get her first kiss from Victor. Very one-dimensional. Her whole purpose is to show that if a female isn't seen as a fuck-toy in Latin Culture then she has no purpose in life. Charlene probably would have already been fucked silly by Victor if she didn't weird him out so much. Her brother is Pineapple.
Grandma Chata	Keeping with its' theme that all Wimmins should be one-dimensional characters, Grandma Chata is the blind-as-a-bat Grandmother to Victor and Valentino. Her whole role, besides setting up plots, (like when she went to see a movie and left two 11-year-olds to their own devices, leading to Victor being tricked into a haunted house for a make-out session with Charlene or calling Valentino downstairs to help her find her glasses so that Victor can steal his rare, golden Peso,) is to give the two main characters a place to live.
Xochi Jalapeño	Another one-dimensional Female character. Xochi works at her father Don Jalapeño's flower shop. Mostly portrayed as a Takes-No-Nonsense character when she was Victor and Valentino's babysitter; However, the rest of the time Xochi is shown as being lazy (like all Mexicans) and can be found sleeping in a lounge chair with a book over her face (instead of the cliche Sombrero hat.)
Pineapple	Charlene's older brother. Now, as far as one-dimensional characters (on this series) go, Pineapple is the most one-dimensional of them all - because all he does is speak in one-syllable sentences or grunts. He is either Charlene's muscle or her toady, depending on what sort of evil she has planned. For instance: Pineapple here was the one making the haunted mansion appear haunted (by dressing up as a ghost and using strings to move things in hope of convincing Victor that the mansion was haunted, so Charlene could make-out with Victor.) Together, Pineapple and Charlene are meant to be the antithesis of Victor and Valentino: Victor and Valentino are more benign in their actions together, whereas Charlene and Pineapple always have something up their sleeves.

Trolling Victor And Valentino Fans

• Tell them that the Our Great God Emperor hates this show and wants to build a Wall around it.
• Remind the "Rule 34 Artist" crowd that they're shipping brothers when they have Victor and Valentino together.
• Infer that this show is actually just Dora The Explorer with a slightly more complex plot.
• Tell a viewer you've already seen the shows' monster/cursed item of the week on The X-Files or on the Friday the 13th 1980s TV series.
• Ask them why they're watching and defending a TV show for kids.
• Inform the fans of how this show and how bad it is, is a symptom of the Mexican Invasion plaguing the USA.

See also

• Adventure Time
• Cartoon Network
• Cartoons
• Jimmy Neutron

Victor And Valentino is part of a series on Television Visit the Television Portal for complete coverage.