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Honey Badger: Difference between revisions
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[[File:Honey-Badger-Dont-Care.jpg|thumb|right|Honey badger don't give a shit it just takes what it wants]] | [[File:Honey-Badger-Dont-Care.jpg|thumb|right|Honey badger don't give a shit it just takes what it wants]] | ||
The innocuously named '''Honey Badger''' is a mammal native to [[Africa]], and named for its penchant for raiding the nests of African Honey bees, because unlike genocide and | The innocuously named '''Honey Badger''' is a mammal native to [[Africa]], and named for its penchant for raiding the nests of African Honey bees, because unlike genocide and pandemics, food doesn't come easy in Africa. Like its euro-fag cousin, the HB shows aggressive tendencies, but what sets the Honey Badger apart is its balls of steel. Balls so hard and massive that even [[Shit no one cares about|the Guiness Book of World Records gave it the title of "Most Fearless Animal"]]. These things really don't give a fuck. | ||
The Honey badger was popularized on the internet after a National Geographic clip was re-dubbed by some [[fag]]. | The Honey badger was popularized on the internet after a National Geographic clip was re-dubbed by some [[fag]]. | ||
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==[[fact|Facts]]== | ==[[fact|Facts]]== | ||
[[File:Randall.jpg|thumb|Randall, who is obviously heterosexual]] | |||
*Honey badger don't care. | *Honey badger don't care. | ||
*Honey badger just takes what it wants. | *Honey badger just takes what it wants. | ||
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==Scourge of the African Wilderness== | ==Scourge of the African Wilderness== | ||
Like most things terrifying/awful beyond reason, the Honey Badger comes from Africa. Its diet includes poisonous snakes, the larva of the African honey bee, hopes | Like most things terrifying/[[Jenkem|awful beyond reason]], the Honey Badger comes from Africa. Its diet includes poisonous snakes, the larva of the African honey bee, hopes, dreams, and anything else it can manage to rip apart. | ||
The honey badger came about as a result of God flexing his nuts and [[pwnt|pwning]] Africa way before He ever thought of [[AIDS]]. Honey badger will royally fuck you up if he sees fit. Seriously he doesn't give a shit. | The honey badger came about as a result of God flexing his nuts and [[pwnt|pwning]] Africa way before He ever thought of [[AIDS]]. Honey badger will royally fuck you up if he sees fit. Seriously, he doesn't give a shit. | ||
Most of the Honey Badger's apparent invulnerability and utter | Most of the Honey Badger's apparent invulnerability and utter absence of fucks stems from its thick hide, allowing most [[attack]]s (including snakebites that would kill most animals) to be simply shrugged off. This is nice to know, but will help you fuck-none when one of those little fuckers tears at your nutsack. | ||
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==External Links== | ==External Links== | ||
{{twitter|randallsanimals|Randall's Twitter}}<br/> | {{twitter|randallsanimals|Randall's Twitter}}<br/> | ||
{{ | {{yt|u|czg123|Randall's YouTube}}<br/> | ||
{{ | {{Fbid|184234851611856|Randall's Fæcbook}} | ||
*[http://popwatch.ew.com/2011/07/25/comic-con-honey-badger/ Honey badger spotted at Comic-Con! He don't care.] | *[http://popwatch.ew.com/2011/07/25/comic-con-honey-badger/ Honey badger spotted at Comic-Con! He don't care.] | ||
*[http://www.badassoftheweek.com/honeybadger.html Honey Badger: Badass of the Week] | *[http://www.badassoftheweek.com/honeybadger.html Honey Badger: Badass of the Week] | ||
Latest revision as of 21:41, 22 August 2024
The innocuously named Honey Badger is a mammal native to Africa, and named for its penchant for raiding the nests of African Honey bees, because unlike genocide and pandemics, food doesn't come easy in Africa. Like its euro-fag cousin, the HB shows aggressive tendencies, but what sets the Honey Badger apart is its balls of steel. Balls so hard and massive that even the Guiness Book of World Records gave it the title of "Most Fearless Animal". These things really don't give a fuck.
The Honey badger was popularized on the internet after a National Geographic clip was re-dubbed by some fag.
Original
Facts
- Honey badger don't care.
- Honey badger just takes what it wants.
- Honey badger is a sick fuck.
- Honey badger evolves into Typhlosion if you set it on fire.
Scourge of the African Wilderness
Like most things terrifying/awful beyond reason, the Honey Badger comes from Africa. Its diet includes poisonous snakes, the larva of the African honey bee, hopes, dreams, and anything else it can manage to rip apart.
The honey badger came about as a result of God flexing his nuts and pwning Africa way before He ever thought of AIDS. Honey badger will royally fuck you up if he sees fit. Seriously, he doesn't give a shit.
Most of the Honey Badger's apparent invulnerability and utter absence of fucks stems from its thick hide, allowing most attacks (including snakebites that would kill most animals) to be simply shrugged off. This is nice to know, but will help you fuck-none when one of those little fuckers tears at your nutsack.
Related Articles
External Links
Randall's Twitter
Randall's YouTube
Randall's Fæcbook
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