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[[File:Aum Shinrikyo Flag.png|right|300px]]
'''Aum Shinrikyo''' ([[Moonspeak|オウム真理教]], in english '[[Unwarranted Self-Importance|Supreme Truth]]') is a former doomsday cult founded in [[Japan|Animeland]] by some blind, fat bastard named ''Shoko Asahara'' ([[Powerword]]: ''Matsumoto Chizuo''). Its belief system is a Clusterfuck combo of everything from [[Buddhism]] to [[Hinduism]] to [[Christianity]], and it's whole dumb goal was to get [[Russia]] and [[America]] to nuke each other, so that it would fulfill some dumb bible quote [[no one cares]] about. Unfortunately for Assawhora, the [[Cold War]] ended shortly after cult started, but that didn't stop the groups retarded idea to delete [[system 32]] on the entire world with nukes and war.
{{clear}}
==Shoko Asahara{{christian}}==
{{Ib|[[File:Shoko Asahara.jpg]]<br>Behold the Jap [[Jesus]].}}
{{Ibhead|<big>'''Shoko Asahara'''</big>{{christian}}}}
{{Ibhead|<big>'''Shoko Asahara'''</big>{{christian}}}}
{{Ibrow|'''Born'''|March 2, 1955}}
{{Ibrow|'''Born'''|March 2, 1955}}
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{{Ibrow|'''Motive'''|Conquest [[Japan]]}}
{{Ibrow|'''Motive'''|Conquest [[Japan]]}}
{{Ibend}}
{{Ibend}}
Before Big Mat decided to start his little [[cult]], he was an [[Alternative Medicine|acupuncturist]] and [[irony|practicer of Chinese Medicine]]. Eventually, he got board of putting needles in people, and decided to start up Aum. Other than the doomsday shit that was the foundation for the cult, Shoko also organized a bunch of [[Attention whoring|publicity stunts]] to get AS in the public eye. Some of this shit would include...


'''Aum Shinrikyo (オウム真理教)''' or "Supreme Truth" in real letters was a [[Japanese]] [[cult]] founded by blind savant Shoko Asahara in 1987. The wholesome group is best known for doing [[pwnage|a little bit of trolling]] in [[90s|1995]] when they pranked a train full of wagie cucks with bags of sarin gas.
* Interviews with famous people.
* Preforming miracles on people.
* Retarded dancing.
* A fucking anime movie.
* No, we didn't make that last one up...
 
<youtube>yO_ewrEc820</youtube>
 
==Pre-Aleph Terrorism==
===Sakamoto family murder===
Around 1989, Tsutsumi Sakamoto, a lawyer who sued cults ([[Irony|and was a former member of AS himself]]), was going to sue Aum Shinrikyo for some unknown faggotry. Assahat caught wind of this, and decided to kill him, [[lol|and his wife and kid]], to protect his many pounds of jap [[Jew Gold]]. There was a short investigation, but it got [[shut it down|shut down]] due to the Tokyo cops being [[too lazy]] to go into Yokohama.
 
===Matsumoto sarin attack===
Taking the jump from murder to chemical warfare isn't very easy for most cults, but Aum Shinrikyo, in true Japanese fashion, seamlessly made the jump in an attempt to prep for a later, and more infamous, gas attack. Taking place in some random building where a lot of Japanese officials were, Shoko and his Marry Band of Butt-Buddies rigged the whole place with noxious gas, and managed to kill some people, proving that death by gas would be an effective method. They also managed to escape the blame for this, cause everyone just assumed it was North Korea, and [[EPIC FAIL|no one decided to investigate any further]].
 
===The 1995 Subway Sarin Attacks===
Now that AS proved that Sarin Gas would work, they decided to bring it to the Subway System, and once again hope this somehow start a Third World War. With some of Japan's top scientists perpetrating the act, they brought the supplies to sneakily make Sarin Gas on to the train. [[TL;DR]], by poking the bag of chemicals with umbrellas (which also had some chemicals on them) they made that sweet sweet Sarin Gas. The plan worked out flawlessly as tons of Japs got [[PWNED]] by the gas. This time however, the Gov knew it was Aum who was fucking their shit up, and so they decided to arrest everyone involved as to prevent further pwnage by Deadly Air.
 
'''''High Score'''''
{{GradedScore|14|14 dead, thousands injured|20|Plan Worked Flawlessly|20|Purpotraiters weren't caught until after the attacks|20|Literally fucking everyone got [[Party V&]]|18|Caused the whole organization to pretend to [[delete fucking everything]] and start over from scratch. -2 for not starting WWIII|92|A-|[[Pretty cool guy|They killed poeple and didn't afraid of anything]]}}
 
{{wanted|6}}
 
==After the clouds of gas subsided==
Everyone involved with the attack ended up in jail. Shoko became a mopey faggot and stayed that way until he got lynched [[last Thursday]]. The remaining [[retards]] who still gave a fuck rebranded the cult as ''Aleph''; [[Obvious|absolutely nothing changed]], except they stopped thinking the world was gonna end. They still popped up in the news from time to time when they get raided or someone does terrorism, but pretty much no one in japan gives a fuck about Aum Shitreekyo or anyone in it anymore.
 
==See Also==
* [[Japan]]
* [[Russia]] - Where they got all their weapons for their play pretend war.
 
==External links==
* [http://aleph.to Aleph's Official Website]
* [http://english.aleph.to English Version that never got updated]


{{truth}}
{{truth}}

Latest revision as of 19:38, 14 November 2024

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Aum Shinrikyo (オウム真理教, in english 'Supreme Truth') is a former doomsday cult founded in Animeland by some blind, fat bastard named Shoko Asahara (Powerword: Matsumoto Chizuo). Its belief system is a Clusterfuck combo of everything from Buddhism to Hinduism to Christianity, and it's whole dumb goal was to get Russia and America to nuke each other, so that it would fulfill some dumb bible quote no one cares about. Unfortunately for Assawhora, the Cold War ended shortly after cult started, but that didn't stop the groups retarded idea to delete system 32 on the entire world with nukes and war.

Shoko Asahara


Behold the Jap Jesus.
Shoko Asahara
Born March 2, 1955
Died July 6, 2018 (aged 63)
Nationality: Japanese  
Highscore Killed 27, injured 6,000+
Top 50? 14th
Style Great Prophet(s)
An Hero? No, executed
Motive Conquest Japan

Before Big Mat decided to start his little cult, he was an acupuncturist and practicer of Chinese Medicine. Eventually, he got board of putting needles in people, and decided to start up Aum. Other than the doomsday shit that was the foundation for the cult, Shoko also organized a bunch of publicity stunts to get AS in the public eye. Some of this shit would include...

  • Interviews with famous people.
  • Preforming miracles on people.
  • Retarded dancing.
  • A fucking anime movie.
  • No, we didn't make that last one up...

Pre-Aleph Terrorism

Sakamoto family murder

Around 1989, Tsutsumi Sakamoto, a lawyer who sued cults (and was a former member of AS himself), was going to sue Aum Shinrikyo for some unknown faggotry. Assahat caught wind of this, and decided to kill him, and his wife and kid, to protect his many pounds of jap Jew Gold. There was a short investigation, but it got shut down due to the Tokyo cops being too lazy to go into Yokohama.

Matsumoto sarin attack

Taking the jump from murder to chemical warfare isn't very easy for most cults, but Aum Shinrikyo, in true Japanese fashion, seamlessly made the jump in an attempt to prep for a later, and more infamous, gas attack. Taking place in some random building where a lot of Japanese officials were, Shoko and his Marry Band of Butt-Buddies rigged the whole place with noxious gas, and managed to kill some people, proving that death by gas would be an effective method. They also managed to escape the blame for this, cause everyone just assumed it was North Korea, and no one decided to investigate any further.

The 1995 Subway Sarin Attacks

Now that AS proved that Sarin Gas would work, they decided to bring it to the Subway System, and once again hope this somehow start a Third World War. With some of Japan's top scientists perpetrating the act, they brought the supplies to sneakily make Sarin Gas on to the train. TL;DR, by poking the bag of chemicals with umbrellas (which also had some chemicals on them) they made that sweet sweet Sarin Gas. The plan worked out flawlessly as tons of Japs got PWNED by the gas. This time however, the Gov knew it was Aum who was fucking their shit up, and so they decided to arrest everyone involved as to prevent further pwnage by Deadly Air.

High Score

Graded Score
Kill count: 14/20 14 dead, thousands injured
Accuracy: 20/20 Plan Worked Flawlessly
Style: 20/20 Purpotraiters weren't caught until after the attacks
Butthurt: 20/20 Literally fucking everyone got Party V&
Bonus: 18/20 Caused the whole organization to pretend to delete fucking everything and start over from scratch. -2 for not starting WWIII
Total Score: 92/100 (A-)
They killed poeple and didn't afraid of anything
See full ranking


Wanted Level:

Interpol


After the clouds of gas subsided

Everyone involved with the attack ended up in jail. Shoko became a mopey faggot and stayed that way until he got lynched last Thursday. The remaining retards who still gave a fuck rebranded the cult as Aleph; absolutely nothing changed, except they stopped thinking the world was gonna end. They still popped up in the news from time to time when they get raided or someone does terrorism, but pretty much no one in japan gives a fuck about Aum Shitreekyo or anyone in it anymore.

See Also

  • Japan
  • Russia - Where they got all their weapons for their play pretend war.

External links

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