Garfield

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America's Favorite Cat

Then one day, Garfield discovered one of the sad facts of life. Masturbation.

Garfieldis the name of:

• Garfield ^⚧ by Jim Davis, a chronically unfunny comic strip.
• Garfield: The Movie, directed by Peter Hewlett, a completely unfunny movie.
• Garfield and Friends, an unfunny Saturday morning cartoon show for kids.
• James A. Garfield, a chronically unfunny President of the United States. [1]

The comic strip, movie, and television show are all about a fat lasagna-crazed genderfluid pu55y. The plot never thickens. Due to its extremely high level of unfunny, Garfield is a frequent target of Photoshoppers. Some believe Garfield is a rehash of "A Christmas Carol" with Garfield as Scrooge and Nermal as Tiny Tim, and the most famous Garfield strip of all time was plagiarized by Jim Davis from an Italian cartoon.

The comic itself started in 1978. Its birthdays are celebrated every year in Davis' stories, yet that fucking cat doesn't want to die anyway. Some argue that this is a proof of Garfield's superpowers, although in fact it's only one of many scientifically proven idiotic ways of ticking the day off for an author. Just like other classical hilarious jokes like "I hate mondays", "Where is my fuckin' food", "Kill a Spider Week" etc.

Below is a list of a typical Garfield jokes:

• Garfield loves himself.
• Garfield hates mondays.
• Garfield is eating.
• Garfield is eating lasagna
• Garfield is sleeping.
• Garfield is cynical.
• Garfield is killing spiders.
• Garfield is watching TV.
• Garfield is drinking coffee.
• Garfield is not chasing mice.
• Garfield is trying to do performance on a fence.
• Garfield is screwing over Jon / Odie / Nermal / mailman.
• Garfield is screwed by a talking bathroom scales.
• Garfield is dating Arlene.
• Garfield is stuck in a tree.
• Garfield is speaking with a teddy bear.
• Garfield is travelling to some rathole.
• Jon is trying to get laid.
• Jon constantly fails at getting laid.

Lorenzo Music (AKA: voice actor of Garfield) doesn't suck by proxy. He in fact, owned.

This is the whole comic strip in a nutshell.

GarfieldTools (comic strip creator)

GarfieldTools, the Garfield comic strip creator, is used to create funny and inappropriate automatically generated comic strips using the Garfield art and allowing a user to insert their own text. It is available here.

Create some strips!

No, Garfield, you have to suicide with bricks and knives, not imaginary ropes.

Traditional or typical GarfieldTools conceits

• Garfield can go crazy-eyed, and has the power to make Jon go crazy-eyed. Sometimes he does this in order to make Jon into his slave, but mostly to make Jon STFU:

Garfield makes Jon go crazy-eyed for asking stupid questions while he's eating.

• Usually when Garfield doesn't say anything, Vulgar Jon makes up for it by being even more creepily perverted than he already was:

Oh, how typical.

• Garbuckle or Garfield-Jon exists in a state of superposition, like the homeless Jerry Garcia-dog hybrid from Invasion of the Body Snatchers. This is more likely part of Jon and/or Garfield's terrified realization that one is obviously hallucinating the other:

Who is Jon? Does Garfield exist?

OMG IT'S AN OFFICIAL GARBUCKLE!!1

This also confirms that Garfield is a faggot popper user.

MS Paint Time

Another method of making Garfield funny is simply editing Garfield out, thus making Jon look like a crazy fuck. Go Crazy. One fellow started by editing out only Garfield's thought bubbles, making Garfield act more like a "normal" cat. Another went further, edited out Garfield entirely, and actually published a book about it. what the fuck?

Garfield minus Arbuckle

Not quite as lulz worthy, but still funny:

Garfield minus Garfield minus Jon

Taken one step further:

Garfield Minus Garfield Minus Jon Minus Backgrounds

And to the logical extreme:

Garfield minus Garfield plus Shoop Da Woop

The Great Garfield Grave-Robbery

The death of Garfield

During the Web 1.0 days, newfags discovered several strips created by Jim Davis in the late '80s that suggested that Garfield had actually been dead for many many years. Jon and Odie had moved away; the house was abandoned and derelict; and his spirit perpetuated there in some kind of existential nightmare-like limbo.

This is the 'Death of Garfield' strip... ... and this is where Jim Davis stole it from. (Very sorrowful and might make you blub) Previous Video | Next Video

Unfortunately, said newfags were fucking idiots as it was actually a nightmare of everyone Garfield relies on being taken away. To this day people people still ask Jim if he intended this strip to be Garfield's death, which pisses him off no end. So keep it up everyone and maybe he'll rage quit!

Many gay comics fans still splurge and squee over this strip, calling it e.g.) "The Scariest Comic of All Time" and "the creepiest comic strip-related thing I have ever seen". Like this is the cartoon cat equivalent of "The Dark Knight Returns" or something.

In fact, it's not surprising that this 1989 strip is so uncharacteristically dark and eerie. It was so far beyond Jim Davis's imagination that he stole it, lock, stock, and barrel, from a far darker animated Italian movie called Allegro Non Troppo, which was released in the 1970s. But being a purveyor of schmalzy feel-good kitsch, Davis pussied out and gave it a happy ending. A picture paints a thousand words. Here are the pictures.

File:Garfield plagiarism panel one (abandoned house).png File:Garfield plagiarism panel two (waking up alone).png File:Garfield plagiarism panel three (alone with an armchair).png File:Garfield plagiarism panel four (dreaming of food).png File:Garfield plagiarism panel five (eyes seen in close-up).png File:Garfield plagiarism panel six (it's a wonderful life).png

Still, it's nice to imagine that Garfield is actually dead though, isn't it?

Galleries

3:1 About missing Pics

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  Last Thursday
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  Jon gets the ffruustration
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  This pretty much sums up both Gayfield movies
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  Jon the transvestite
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  Jon is so sad
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  Jon is so horny
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  Jon is also so stupid
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  Sonic Your too slow!
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  Beastiality
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Not 3:1 About missing Pics

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  GRRFRRLD GRR BRRRK TR BRRRD
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[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

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  Nothing compares with your ass, Garfield
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  Garfield makes a narrow escape...for the next 5 seconds
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  HE COMES!
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  Doing the crusadercat
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  Realfield
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  Go back to bed, Rorschach!
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  Oh that Garfield is at it again!
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See Also

Here's looking at you, Jim!

• Art Thief - what Jim Davis is
• Calvin and Hobbes
• Dilbert
• Dilbert Hole, the
• Exploitable
• Fail
• Peanuts
• Plagiarism - "The Death of Garfield" is an example of this
• Simmons, Nick - another famous art thief who got caught by the internet
• Tracing

External lynx

> Odie looks strangely familiar too...

• "Garfield: Pussy or No?" (Archived: 1 2)
• Scarsfield - sick fuck edit of the first two Garfield movies.

4chanarchive

4chanarchive has archived threads related
to this topic. [CollapseClick for Links]

• 54272673: Garfield Thread

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