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*Donate to [[Derek Stewart|nigger]] at www.dailycashblessings.com <youtube>wWy5FCbhqRE</youtube>
*Obtain [[I will have your humility|happiness]] and [[porn]]!
*Obtain [[I will have your humility|happiness]] and [[porn]]!
*Buy a [[Large Hadron Collider|huge ass machine]] to [[divide by zero]].
*Buy a [[Large Hadron Collider|huge ass machine]] to [[divide by zero]].
Revision as of 18:01, 21 August 2011
Lesbians are socially ostracized and have to use marked bills..Don't hate the game hate the player.Rich people are usually depressed because they don't have any real friends.Presidents get angry at the defacing of money.One of the many ways to get money.Even Technologically Impaired Duck is making money on the internetFile:Washingtons money.jpgThey love money too.
Money is a term that refers to the medium of exchange in any standardized system of trade. Ancient cultures had yet to invent bullshit, and so all of their 'money' was actually just a standardized form of barter - they traded a socially agreed upon amount of a certain precious commodity such as salt, or white gold, for goods.
Modern money has the advantage of not having any worth but what is socially agreed upon, because it is now made out of largely worthless metals, and fibers. Allegedly these worthless representations of wealth are backed by massive reserves of precious metals, specifically Jew Gold. In practice, however, nobody really cares as long as you can still afford a slushie.
IT IS THE FUCKING THING THAT THE MORONS CLOSED THE OLD ED FOR. For more info: capitalism
9 - Your highly paid scientists have invented new organs that don't require you to take a dump, so you don't care that your toilet is broken. This is known as the don't give a shit level.
8 - You don't use a toilet any more, your Palestinian slave siphons the poo from your ass with his mouth while you sleep each night.
7 - The toilet attendant fixes the toilet as soon as it breaks without you noticing and then you buttrape him for not working hard enough probably.
6 - THE EQUILIBRIUM: you buy a new toilet.
4 - You try and save your wages to buy a new toilet but actually you spend it all on booze to drown the sorrows of your miserable life.
4b - Daddy buys you a new toilet. Worst. Birthday. Ever.
A slang term that is used to describe any form of money that is not the United States dollar. Funny Money is invariably more technically advanced than real money, and often shows its superiority through the use of multiple colors on a single bill, as opposed to the boring dollars monochromatic tones.
The official currency of Vietnam is the Dong, which is, of course, hilarious.
NB - Ironically perhaps, the term 'funny money' is a term sometimes applied colloquially in Europe to counterfeit notes. Therefore if you're in Paris, Prague or erm... Scunthorpe then bear in mind you really don't want to fill your wallet up with the stuff, irrespective of what's been said above. Not to be confused with furry money, which is money used in transactions to purchase animalsex.
Monopoly money
President Obama has stated that we cannot treat US tax dollars like Monopoly money [1].
To test this theory we hired a troop of scientists and stuff.
Experiment 1 - dollars as Monopoly money
Admittedly dollars do not have the right numbers on the front but use of an orange crayon can soon convert them. Like Lioncash.
Experiment 2 - as Coke straws
Monopoly money is easier to roll but is a bit small unless you have a Jew nose. Dollars have the advantage of already having traces of cocaine on them and so CSI can't prove it was you.
Experiment 3 - as cigar lighters
Monopoly money burns a bit too fast but then it cheaper than using dollars to transfer fire. Both dollars and Monopoly notes can theoretically be used to roll joints, but they burn shittily, taste shitty and the ink gives you cancer.
Experiment 4 - as toilet paper
Dollars don't allow your fingers to burst through, but Monopoly money is softer if you have piles.
Pink Floyd
Money, get away.
Get a good job with good pay and you're okay.
Money, it's a gas.
Grab that cash with both hands and make a stash.
New car, caviar, four star daydream,
Think I'll buy me a football team.
Money, get back.
I'm all right jack keep your hands off of my stack.
Money, it's a hit.
Don't give me that do goody good bullshit.
I'm in the high-fidelity first class traveling set
And I think I need a lear jet.
Money, it's a crime.
Share it fairly but don't take a slice of my pie.
Money, so they say
Is the root of all evil today.
But if you ask for a raise it's no surprise that they're
Giving none away.
A small organ lodged behind the prostate and ahead of the rectum, in the general region known as the taint. ED routinely encourages its users to stimulate this organ and ejaculate money that can in turn be given to ED so that it can continue bringing you lulz.
Of course, everybody knows that's a scam. Should it have been true though, the solution
instead of giving money would be to stop going to EncyclopediaDramatica, so you wouldn't
invade their precious little wimpy baww bandwidth.
