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Carrie Jenkins-Ichikawa and Jonathan Ichikawa
Carrie Jenkins-Ichikawa and Jonathan Ichikawa are attention-whore professors of philosophy at the University of British Columbia, who got the attention they desperately crave by appearing on American newsmagazine show “Nightline” to flaunt their polyamory.
Carrie and Jonathan’s extraordinarily fascinating (to them) love life was also featured in a lengthy article in the Chronicle of Higher Education.
They are known for their online posturing, preening, tweeting and feuding.
Polyamory
Carrie has made a huge fucking deal about the fact that she has at least two guys pounding her out regularly. She has even been nicknamed “the hoover of Vancouver” for her reputed prowess in dick-sucking. Yet she annoys everyone by couching her polyamory in highly pretentious terms like “I have multiple loves” and sniffily replies “I don’t talk about my sex life in public” when anyone asks her how frequently and vigorously she is getting fucked or if “multiple loves” translates into “multiple orgasms.”
Her cuck husband Jonathan, by contrast with Carrie’s active sex life, presumably has “multiple dildoes,” and sits at home tugging on his tiny penis because he tweets about how much time he spends on dating sites but never seems to get any dates.
The “throuple” they belong to demonstrates the principle that when two men share a woman, the testosterone of each male declines to, at most, half that of the average male. In the case of bug-eyed, veiny-headed Carrie Jenkins Ichikawa, due to her mousy and asexual appearance, the decline in the total free testosterone of her male partners is even more dramatic, to something like one-tenth the T-levels of the average male. Husband Jonathan Ichikawa (also known as “the Canuck cuck”) dyes his hair rainbow colors, eye-fucks the camera in frequent selfies he posts on Twitter, posts fashion tips, and has the personality of a giggly little girl. Boyfriend Ray Hsu (dubbed “the Lothario from Ontario”) is an elfin creature who weighs 11 pounds, wears skinny jeans, and teases his hipster bouffant to perfection every morning.
Jonathan Ichikawa, like the pathetic cuck that he is, revels in his ignominious status to such a degree that he lists “polyamory” as one of his “interests” on his professional website. A student justly called him out on this and even compared him to Harvey Weinstein. Gravely butthurt, Ichikawa posted the student’s email online, apparently seeking to rally his Twitter followers to reassure him that he is not a bad fellow.
Internet feuds
The Ichikawas have also received online attention due to their feuding with all-powerful philosophy warlord Brian Leiter, who successfully trolled Carrie to the point that she was forced to claim PTSD and trauma because Leiter was mean to her on the internet. Specifically, no joke, Carrie Jenkins-Ichikawa, the tenured Canada Research Chair in Philosophy, was supposedly rendered unable to “function as a normal member of the profession” because Leiter called her a “sanctimonious arse” in an email message.
Upon receiving her tenured professorship, Carrie issued a haughty and silly statement online that she would no longer treat philosophy’s long-reigning reputation arbiter Brian Leiter as a “normal member of the profession.” Leiter amusingly didn’t just brush this off as the pathetic squeak of a comparative nonentity, but “released the Kraken”—his high powered Canadian lawyer—on her and her limp-dicked husband for defamation, causing two thirds of Canadian academia’s power-throuple to collectively shit its pants.
Shit got real when someone calling himself “Brian Leiter” mailed feces to Jenkins-Ichikawa and a few other people who had clashed with Leiter online in the past. Leiter (conveniently) was out of the country when the poop was mailed from Chicago. He made a big production of investigating who might have done such a thing, even hiring a handwriting expert and demanding handwriting samples from the top three suspects, with inconclusive results. Leiter also defended himself by pointing out that he had long been on record as stating that Carrie is not worth a shit as a scholar, so it would actually be a waste of perfectly good shit to send her any.
Crappy scholarship
Carrie proved she isn’t worth a shit as a scholar by mistaking an anonymous paper by a retarded undergraduate for the work of an esteemed professor in the philosophy of love named Alan Soble, resulting in major lulz. It was an especially stupid mistake because the undergraduate’s paper was full of references to Soble and criticisms of Soble by name, yet the dumb bitch who holds the Canada Research Chair in Philosophy didn’t have the brainpower to suss out that the paper wasn’t actually written by Soble. She reacted to criticism by crying that “everybody makes mistakes” and that her mean critics had triggered her “imposter syndrome” and were big bad meanies.
Since then, she has then wisely refrained from scholarship, instead writing a bad novel and posting on Twitter the oh-so-bad paintings she does.
In 2022, Jenkins published a stupid book called Sad Love in which, due to her miserable and confused sex life with two emasculated sissies, she announced that “sad love” is an important thing that we should all be talking about.
Jonathan was a spousal hire who has never done anything interesting as a scholar and focuses mostly on coloring his hair, tweeting selfies, masturbating to the occasional positive student evaluation he receives, and fruitlessly looking for dates online.
Quotes by and about the Ichikawas
Previous Quote | Next Quote
External links
- Carrie Jenkins-Ichikawa’s Twitter
- Cuck hubby Jonathan Ichikawa’s Twitter
- Boyfriend Ray Hsu’s Twitter
- Jonathan Ichikawa’s professional website
- Buzzfeed article about shit getting sent to Carrie and others by someone purporting to be Brian Leiter
- Bizarrely Careless Scholarship Watch: Carrie Jenkins (From Leiter Reports Philosophy Blog)
- Carrie Jenkins, Alan Soble, and the “Chasm of Crap” (From Leiter Reports Philosophy Blog)
- “‘I Have Multiple Loves’: Carrie Jenkins Makes the Philosophical Case for Polyamory” (The Chronicle of Higher Education)
- “What Life Is Like When You’re in a Polyamorous Relationship” (ABC Nightline)
See also
- Polyamory
- Philosophy
- Cuckoldry
- Narcissistic personality disorder
- Attention whore
- Asia
- Canada
- Unwarranted Self-Importance
- Skank
Carrie Jenkins-Ichikawa and Jonathan Ichikawa is related to a series on AZNS. | [Herrow] |
Carrie Jenkins-Ichikawa and Jonathan Ichikawa is part of a series on Visit the Whores Portal for complete coverage. |
Carrie Jenkins-Ichikawa and Jonathan Ichikawa is part of a series on Visit the Sex Portal for complete coverage. |