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Heterophobia

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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Apartheid-era anti-straight poster from a public train station in Warrington

Heterophobia is a serious psychological ailment causing uncontrolled expression of fear and hatred toward heterosexuals. Throughout history heterophobia has been linked with heinous crimes against humanity.

Blood libels

Heterophobes indulge in a rich tapestry of fantastic allegations against the heterosexual minority, which they allege to be laid down in two of the apocryphal "Protocols of the Elders of Zion", called "Leviticus" and "Deuteronomy". Supposedly, this Jewish conspiracy organized heterosexuals to sacrifice gays to their heathen god in a ritual sacrifice by stoning. Claiming to be defenders of human rights, these vigilance groups claim that countries run by the Jews, such as Iran, still engage in these blood sacrifices. These rumors are, of course, baseless. In fact, Afghanistan, Pakistan, and Iran are all basically run by faggots. (I'm not making this up!) As our reliable sources at Blackwater inform us, the Iranians really stone women for exceeding very strict and discriminatory quotas on heterosexuality.

Anti-heterosexual atrocities

Many atrocities begin with the allegation that heterosexuals are breeding and threaten to take over and destroy the planet, like they did in Kosovo. Sinister "sterilization" protocols began with tards and quickly spread to cover Jews, trade unionists, hackers, liberals, and especially blondes. This campaign was so sinister and widespread that it is difficult to find heterosexuals, even under promises of anonymity, who will admit that this is not a voluntary decision. In addition to out-and-out sterilization, there are myriad ever-cleverer backdoor methods such as birth control pills, condoms, oral sex, the internet (also known as pornography), and most effective of all, Dungeons and Dragons. These methods have ravaged the heterosexual population to the brink of extinction.

Massacres

Mass murders of straights have repeatedly been organized by groups of fanatic gays like the Knights Templar, the Brownshirts, and Planned Parenthood, running into the millions. When budget cuts limited extermination protocols, they became targets of the gay bomb. (See TOW)

Systematic discrimination

Up until recently, under the decree of the tyrannical witch, Mary Lee Walsh, heterosexual love was a serious crime in the state of Virginia, punishable by death.

Heterosexuals are banned from gay marriage, and subjected to an arbitrary "child support system" that consumed three dollars in bureaucratic junkets to Las Vegas for every dollar that reaches a child in need. Apartheid practices including segregated dorms, military service, and bathrooms has been reported. These measures are so successful that within the heterosexual community, people reportedly engage in only a small fraction of the sexual contacts enjoyed by normal homosexuals.

Treating heterophobia

The first-line treatment for heterophobic lesbians is two or three courses of rape, which should be administered by a board certified rape therapist. Heterophobic faggots receive similar treatment, supplemented with electroejaculation. (Fuck, we don't have an article about that?) Unfortunately, few heterophobes commit themselves for treatment, and in a widely heterophobic society little can be done to provide treatment to the majority of the heterophobic community.

Save the heterosexuals

The future of heterosexuality may lie with captive breeding programs designed to help them fit into the larger gay community. Research of hybrid populations such as metrosexuals, bisexuals, transsexuals, transvestites and others continues. Others are trained to camouflage themselves in roles as faghags. The idea is that a hybrid species can retain some of the ecological role and character of the original wild heterosexual population, while blending in well enough to "pass for gay" and go unnoticed by those seeking to do them harm. So far, results have been mixed, but scientists remain hopeful.

Lizzy the Lezzy

Up until recently, Heterophobia barely existed. But a Facebook page ran by a 40-year old dyke called "Lizzy the Lezzy" that claims to "support homosexuality" is simply a hate page targeted towards Christians and Straights, otherwise known as normal people.

Lizzy is a living abomination with a british accent that also makes cringy rap videos and is the prime center of heterophobia.

See Also


Heterophobia is part of a series on

Social Justice

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Homosexual Deviants

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Heterophobia is part of a series on Psychology
Mental illness & Disorders

AcrotomophiliaAddictionAgoraphobiaAlcoholismAlexis Pilkington SyndromeAlzheimer'sAnorexiaAntisocial personality disorderAnthropophobiaAnxietyADDADHDAsperger's SyndromeAutismBimboficationBipolarBorderline personality disorderBug ChasingBulimiaCognitive dissonanceDeep thinkerDepressionDick ImpalementDown's SyndromeDyslexiaEating disorderFactitious disorderFake SchizophreniaFauxlimiaFeminismGender dysphoriaGirl on the Internet SyndromeHeterophobiaHero ComplexHFAHistrionic Personality DisorderHutchence's SyndromeHyperbolimiaInadequacyInconsistent personality disorderInsanityLiberal Butthurt SyndromeLiberalismLow Self-esteem'Missing White Woman' SyndromeMultiple personality disorderNapoleon ComplexNarcissistic personality disorderNeurotypicalObsessive Compulsive DisorderParanoiaParanoid personality disorderPeter Pan SyndromePost-Traumatic Stress DisorderPsychopathyPyromaniaRetardationSchizophreniaSeasonal Affective DisorderSelf-diagnosisSelf InjurySexsomniaSickfuckerySociopathySocial anxiety disorderSpecial Snowflake SyndromeTerminological percipience disorderTrolling Induced Transsexuality SyndromeTulpaUnrealistic expectationsVictim complex

Fetishes:

AcrotomophiliaAquaphiliaArborphiliaAudiophiliaAutogynephiliaBalloon FetishBestialityCarmen Electra complexCross DressingDollfiliaEmetophiliaEmosexualityEproctophiliaFatty Fetish (Female Fat Admirer) • FetishismFoot FetishFurniture PornFurrismGoo girlGuroHeterophiliaHomophiliaInflation FetishJapanophiliaJungle FeverLesbian pedophiliaLotion PlayMacrophiliaMaiesiophiliaMechanophiliaMpregNecrophiliaObjectophiliaOedipial ComplexParaphiliaPedophiliaPlushophiliaPregnant LoliPregnophiliaQuicksand FetishRangerphiliaSpectrophiliaStatuephiliaTrichophiliaVoraphiliaWet and Messy FetishismWetlookXenophiliaYellow feverZoophilia

E-Psychosis:

Chronic Troll SyndromeDeletionismE-goE-PsychiatristE-PsychiatryETDHivemindI-DosingI have a 140 IQIRC DiseaseImaginary girlfriendInternet Disease & Internet Disease ChartInternet poverty delusionsInternet RehabInternet troll personality disorderMega ultra super geniusNerdy Fandom Gateway TheorySex by associationLulz-BlindnessWikipedia's Greatest Hits Diseases

Experiments:

ask.fmBrainwashingHypnosisMilgram ExperimentScientologyStanford Prison ExperimentThe Hivemind Corollary

Sites:

Above Top SecretB/Bodies Under SiegeCYOCChatrouletteDefense Industries OrganizationDeekerFoolQuest.comInkBunnyNeuticles.comPsyke.orgWarpMyMind.com

See also:

American Psychiatric AssociationAngerASMRChild abuseConscienceDreamsDSMElan SchoolEnlightenmentIntelligenceLobotomyMary BellPsychiatristySerial KillersTake the meat bridgeThe Law of ConformityTrigger Warning