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Henry Kissinger: Difference between revisions
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'''Henry Kissmyassenger'''{{Jew}} is a sly international [[criminal]] who gained recognition as part of the comedy act ''Kiss my Dick'', along with [[Richard Nixon]] during the 1970s, and later as Gerald Ford's scheming collaborator. Currently he's on the lam. Any attempts to subdue Kissinger will be met with swift Justice from his [[cock|Magic Murder Bag]]. | '''Henry Kissmyassenger'''{{Jew}} is a sly international [[criminal]] who gained recognition as part of the comedy act ''Kiss my Dick'', along with [[Richard Nixon]] during the 1970s, and later as Gerald Ford's scheming collaborator. Currently he's on the lam. Any attempts to subdue Kissinger will be met with swift Justice from his [[cock|Magic Murder Bag]]. | ||
A [[Germany|Central European Jew]], Kissinger made it to Washington bringing along a lot of [[Holocaust|Jewish resentment]]. He served the man and by extent the mongrel populace of diverse continents through his righteous implementing of anticommunism and upholding of [[BDSM|traditional American values and liberties]]. | A [[Germany|Central European Jew]], Kissinger made it to [[Washington, D.C.|Washington]] bringing along a lot of [[Holocaust|Jewish resentment]]. He served the man and by extent the mongrel populace of diverse continents through his righteous implementing of anticommunism and upholding of [[BDSM|traditional American values and liberties]]. | ||
== Background == | == Background == | ||
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Kissinger is a graduate of the [[Shitty|City]] College of [[New York]]. While his public persona was that of the stereotypical [[Circumcision|bored Jew]], he began to participate in a number of comedy albums and [[porn|B-movies]]. The knowledge of show business gave him the necessary skills to treat people like [[whores]]--which eventually would be of great use in his political and diplomatic careers. | Kissinger is a graduate of the [[Shitty|City]] College of [[New York]]. While his public persona was that of the stereotypical [[Circumcision|bored Jew]], he began to participate in a number of comedy albums and [[porn|B-movies]]. The knowledge of show business gave him the necessary skills to treat people like [[whores]]--which eventually would be of great use in his political and diplomatic careers. | ||
During the 70s, Kissinger rose to national prominence as Nixon's National Security Adviser, a position from where he began to cultivate his voracious sexual appetite. In short time, the bastard amassed [[moar]] and [[moar]] power by collecting [[sex]] films featuring large amounts of compromising and potentially dangerous information on many important and famous people, including [[loser|Alexander Haig]], [[Cockmongler|David Rockefeller]], [[pedophile|Rev. Jerry Falwell]], [[Fat dyke|Liza Minnelli]], and future first lady [[White middle class liberal|Rosalyn Carter]]. Allegedly, the jewel of this collection was a 16mm hardcore short film from around 1947, featuring a young [[furfag|George H. W. Bush]] in unnatural acts with a turkey. | During the 70s, Kissinger rose to national prominence as Nixon's National Security Adviser, a position from where he began to cultivate his [[vore|voracious]] sexual appetite. In short time, the bastard amassed [[moar]] and [[moar]] power by collecting [[sex]] films featuring large amounts of compromising and potentially dangerous information on many important and famous people, including [[loser|Alexander Haig]], [[Cockmongler|David Rockefeller]], [[pedophile|Rev.]] [[Jerry Falwell]], [[Fat dyke|Liza Minnelli]], and future first lady [[White middle class liberal|Rosalyn Carter]]. Allegedly, the jewel of this collection was a 16mm hardcore short film from around 1947, featuring a young [[furfag|George H. W. Bush]] in unnatural acts with a [[Thanksgiving|turkey]]. | ||
An extensive investigation of Kissinger's files by the FBI in 2005 showed that he maintains the tapes, and still [[masturbation|polishes his candlestick]] frequently with them. | An extensive investigation of Kissinger's files by the [[FBI]] in 2005 showed that he maintains the tapes, and still [[masturbation|polishes his candlestick]] frequently with them. | ||
== Foreground == | == Foreground == | ||
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[[Image:Henry Kissinger mugshot.jpg|thumb|left|He was arrested in 1971 for [[pwning]] his bitch.]] | [[Image:Henry Kissinger mugshot.jpg|thumb|left|He was arrested in 1971 for [[pwning]] his bitch.]] | ||
At the height of his popularity, Kissinger was even considered sexy, earning him the nickname | At the height of his popularity, Kissinger was even considered sexy, earning him the nickname "Ass Hungry." | ||
After the [[Completely irrelevant history|Watergate scandal]], he managed to come out clean of that shithole, continuing in power as the good Jew he was. | After the [[Completely irrelevant history|Watergate scandal]], he managed to come out clean of that shithole, continuing in power as the good Jew he was. His sex habits changed a bit; after he left the government, he declared to the press that he "'''''would not date women who don't use moistened tissue on visits to the toilet, as they are not completely clean.'''''" He insisted that potential [[prostitute|female suitors]] must not rely solely on toilet tissues in the bathroom, even advising to "'''''make the switch to''''' [the recently introduced] '''''baby wipes if they don't already use them.'''''" He told the ''Washington Post'', "'''''If they're using dry paper, they aren't washing all of themselves. It's just unclean. So if I go inside a woman's house and see the toilet paper there, I'll explain this. And if she doesn't make the adjustment to baby wipes, I'll know she's not completely clean.'''''" | ||
[[Image:Arab Kissinger.JPG|thumb|In 2001, Kissinger fled Paris in disguise to avoid capture.]] | [[Image:Arab Kissinger.JPG|thumb|In 2001, Kissinger fled Paris in disguise to avoid capture.]] | ||
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{{Quote|Power is the ultimate aphrodisiac for attracting a splendid, fragrant and freshly shaved pussy|Henry Kissinger, on ''60 minutes''.|color=red|size=440%}} | {{Quote|Power is the ultimate aphrodisiac for attracting a splendid, fragrant and freshly shaved pussy|Henry Kissinger, on ''60 minutes''.|color=red|size=440%}} | ||
Kissinger also became known as much for his crusades for the [[Protocols of the Elders of Zion|Jew World Dominance]], and other political causes as he was for [[buttsecks]]. He further demonstrated a violent reputation for his public outbursts and antics. In 1971, he was arrested for assault and battery against his then mistress, the porn actress [[Paris Hilton|Kathy Hilton]]. Kissinger was sentenced to two months in jail and later, to four months in [[drug]] treatment for repeatedly failing drug tests while on probation. | Kissinger also became known as much for his [[crusades]] for the [[Protocols of the Elders of Zion|Jew World Dominance]], and other political causes as he was for [[buttsecks]]. He further demonstrated a violent reputation for his public outbursts and antics. In 1971, he was arrested for assault and battery against his then mistress, the porn actress [[Paris Hilton|Kathy Hilton]]. Kissinger was sentenced to two months in jail and later, to four months in [[drug]] treatment for repeatedly failing drug tests while on probation. | ||
For his love and devotion in toppling governments, starting genocide, and killing infidels, he was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize in 1973, which also happened to be the day that irony died. | For his love and devotion in toppling governments, starting [[genocide]], and [[Jihad|killing infidels]], he was awarded the [[Nobel Prize for Racism|Nobel Peace Prize]] in 1973, which also happened to be the day that [[irony]] died. | ||
== Pwnage record == | == Pwnage record == | ||
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[[Image:Henry_Kissinger_MartiniGuy.jpg|thumb|Join to party or die, bad man.]] | [[Image:Henry_Kissinger_MartiniGuy.jpg|thumb|Join to party or die, bad man.]] | ||
Kissinger also has been notable as the brain behind the pwnage of a number of international and local personalities: | Kissinger also has been notable as the [[brain]] behind the [[pwnage]] of a number of international and local personalities: | ||
* | *[[socialist|Salvador Allende]], Chilean president | ||
*[[guido|Aldo Moro]], Italian prime minister | *[[guido|Aldo Moro]], Italian prime minister | ||
*[[Bhutto|Ali Bhutto]], Pakistani president | *[[Bhutto|Ali Bhutto]], Pakistani president | ||
*[[Richard Nixon]] | *[[Richard Nixon]] | ||
*People from Cambodia, Vietnam, India, [[Cyprus]], Turkey, Egypt, Pakistan, Rhodesia, Indonesia, and from Argentina, Uruguay and Chile through [[ | *People from [[Cambodia]], [[Vietnam]], [[India]], [[Cyprus]], [[Turkey]], [[Egypt]], [[Pakistan]], [[Rhodesia]], [[Indonesia]], and from [[Argentina]], [[Uruguay]], and [[Chile]] through [[fascism|Operation Condor]] | ||
*Eventually, [[you]] | *Eventually, [[you]] | ||
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== External Links == | == External Links == | ||
*[http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/gate/archive/2002/12/06/notes120602.DTL Henry Kissinger In Hell] | *[http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/gate/archive/2002/12/06/notes120602.DTL Henry Kissinger In Hell] | ||
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SJiD43oeLCU Henry Kissinger in ''Freakazoid''] | |||
*[http://www.commondreams.org/scriptfiles/views03/1211-04.htm Moar blood] | *[http://www.commondreams.org/scriptfiles/views03/1211-04.htm Moar blood] | ||
*[http://ronmwangaguhunga.blogspot.com/2005/01/kissinger-and-media-socialite-war.html Even moar blood] | *[http://ronmwangaguhunga.blogspot.com/2005/01/kissinger-and-media-socialite-war.html Even moar blood] | ||
Revision as of 00:07, 6 June 2011
Henry Kissmyassenger✡ is a sly international criminal who gained recognition as part of the comedy act Kiss my Dick, along with Richard Nixon during the 1970s, and later as Gerald Ford's scheming collaborator. Currently he's on the lam. Any attempts to subdue Kissinger will be met with swift Justice from his Magic Murder Bag.
A Central European Jew, Kissinger made it to Washington bringing along a lot of Jewish resentment. He served the man and by extent the mongrel populace of diverse continents through his righteous implementing of anticommunism and upholding of traditional American values and liberties.
Background
Kissinger is a graduate of the City College of New York. While his public persona was that of the stereotypical bored Jew, he began to participate in a number of comedy albums and B-movies. The knowledge of show business gave him the necessary skills to treat people like whores--which eventually would be of great use in his political and diplomatic careers.
During the 70s, Kissinger rose to national prominence as Nixon's National Security Adviser, a position from where he began to cultivate his voracious sexual appetite. In short time, the bastard amassed moar and moar power by collecting sex films featuring large amounts of compromising and potentially dangerous information on many important and famous people, including Alexander Haig, David Rockefeller, Rev. Jerry Falwell, Liza Minnelli, and future first lady Rosalyn Carter. Allegedly, the jewel of this collection was a 16mm hardcore short film from around 1947, featuring a young George H. W. Bush in unnatural acts with a turkey.
An extensive investigation of Kissinger's files by the FBI in 2005 showed that he maintains the tapes, and still polishes his candlestick frequently with them.
Foreground
At the height of his popularity, Kissinger was even considered sexy, earning him the nickname "Ass Hungry."
After the Watergate scandal, he managed to come out clean of that shithole, continuing in power as the good Jew he was. His sex habits changed a bit; after he left the government, he declared to the press that he "would not date women who don't use moistened tissue on visits to the toilet, as they are not completely clean." He insisted that potential female suitors must not rely solely on toilet tissues in the bathroom, even advising to "make the switch to [the recently introduced] baby wipes if they don't already use them." He told the Washington Post, "If they're using dry paper, they aren't washing all of themselves. It's just unclean. So if I go inside a woman's house and see the toilet paper there, I'll explain this. And if she doesn't make the adjustment to baby wipes, I'll know she's not completely clean."
—Henry Kissinger, on 60 minutes. | ||
Kissinger also became known as much for his crusades for the Jew World Dominance, and other political causes as he was for buttsecks. He further demonstrated a violent reputation for his public outbursts and antics. In 1971, he was arrested for assault and battery against his then mistress, the porn actress Kathy Hilton. Kissinger was sentenced to two months in jail and later, to four months in drug treatment for repeatedly failing drug tests while on probation.
For his love and devotion in toppling governments, starting genocide, and killing infidels, he was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize in 1973, which also happened to be the day that irony died.
Pwnage record
Kissinger also has been notable as the brain behind the pwnage of a number of international and local personalities:
- Salvador Allende, Chilean president
- Aldo Moro, Italian prime minister
- Ali Bhutto, Pakistani president
- Richard Nixon
- People from Cambodia, Vietnam, India, Cyprus, Turkey, Egypt, Pakistan, Rhodesia, Indonesia, and from Argentina, Uruguay, and Chile through Operation Condor
- Eventually, you
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