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Joanna Rutkowska: Difference between revisions
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'''Joanna Rutkowska''' (formerly '''Jan Rutkowski''') is a [[Nazi|Polish]] [[faggot|security faggot]], primarily known for her research on transgender relationships and contributions to [[tranny]] [[trap]] installation and hiding techniques. She's widely renowned for being the first [[transvestite]] to admit her condition on a [[faggotry|security faggotry]] conference. | '''Joanna Rutkowska''' (formerly '''Jan Rutkowski''') is a [[Nazi|Polish]] [[faggot|security faggot]], primarily known for her research on transgender relationships and contributions to [[tranny]] [[trap]] installation and hiding techniques. She's widely renowned for being the first [[transvestite]] to admit her condition on a [[faggotry|security faggotry]] conference. | ||
Other faggots with [[basement dwelling|computer security knowledge]] consider him to be hot and feminine. Dan Kaminsky is currently engaged to Mr. Rutkowski. | Other faggots with [[basement dwelling|computer security knowledge]] consider him to be hot and feminine. Dan Kaminsky is currently engaged to Mr. Rutkowski. | ||
[[Image:Trollface_More_HD.png|thumb|right|250px]] | |||
<center>[[Image:182009751-M.jpg]]</center> | |||
===The trap=== | ===The trap=== | ||
Rutkowski transformed himself into Rutkowska using a [[Shit no one cares about|special technique]] called Blue Pill. She claimed at BlackHat 2006 that Blue Pill was [[penis|completely undetectable]], so | Rutkowski transformed himself into Rutkowska using a [[Shit no one cares about|special technique]] called [[tranny|Blue]] [[trap|Pill]]. She claimed at BlackHat 2006 that Blue Pill was [[penis|completely undetectable]], so in 2007 two [[faggot|researchers]] challenged her to prove her claim in real-world [[secks|testing]]. Rutkowska responded that she would agree under a modified set of conditions:[http://it.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=243315&cid=19690763] | ||
* Five (5) [[cock|computer]]s instead of the two (2) proposed | * Five (5) [[cock|computer]]s instead of the two (2) proposed | ||
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===How to detect the trap=== | ===How to detect the trap=== | ||
[[Image:Ackbar.jpg|thumb|right|Admiral Ackbar: "IT'S A TRAP" at Defcon 2007.]] | |||
[[ | This entire section is dedicated to help security faggots and unsuspecting passengers, for detecting the [[tranny|Blue]] [[trap|Pill]] installed on Joanna Rutkowska. Shall you encounter this rare specimen of [[failure|rootkit]], beware. | ||
* [[PROTIP]]: [[Rape|Beware]] [[epic]] [[trollface]] | |||
*The chin is a big danger sign saying: | * The chin is a big danger sign saying: [[butt|root]] [[rape|kit]]. | ||
* The thing around his neck contains Blue Pill. It will instantly turn the [[penis]] into a [[plastic crap|fake vagina]] ready to lurk for poor virgin security faggots. People with real sex experience will obviously note the difference of touch and wetting and panic almost instantly. | |||
*The thing around | * The TPI Industrial radioactive particle emitter is used to increase estrogen levels. This helps to convert the man [[boobs]] into small realistic-looking [[tits]]. Don't be fooled, they are more fake than [[your mom|your moms]]. | ||
*The TPI Industrial radioactive particle emitter is used to increase estrogen levels. This helps to convert the man [[boobs]] into small realistic-looking tits. Don't be fooled, they are more fake than [[your mom|your moms]]. | * The wig sticks to the head thanks to some chewing gum compound mixed with whale [[semen]]. It's highly nutritious for the skin and slows down the balding process. | ||
*The wig sticks to the head thanks to some chewing gum compound mixed with whale [[semen]]. It's highly nutritious for the skin and slows down the balding process | |||
===I has stealz malware=== | ===I has stealz malware=== | ||
Joanna has claimed to have stealth [[hax]] that sends [[Mudkipz]] and Splinter Rapes to your mom. It was later proven wrong by master faggots '''Thomas Ptacek''' and his overweight family. [[Fail]]. | Joanna has claimed to have stealth [[hax]] that sends [[Mudkipz]] and Splinter Rapes to your mom. It was later proven wrong by master faggots '''Thomas Ptacek''' and his overweight family. [[Fail]]. | ||
===Engaged to Dan=== | ===Engaged to Dan=== | ||
Joanna and '''Dan Kaminsky''' have been engaged since [[100 years ago]] | Joanna and '''Dan Kaminsky''' have been engaged since [[100 years ago]]. | ||
<center>[[Image:Itsatarp2.JPG|400px]][[Image:Itsatarp3.JPG|400px]]</center> | <center>[[Image:Itsatarp2.JPG|400px]][[Image:Itsatarp3.JPG|400px]]</center> | ||
{{quote| | |||
{{quote|[[tits|Stealth malware]] can distract people from my [[cock|chin]]!|'''Joanna Rutkowska [[asking for it]]'''}} | |||
{{SecurityFaggots}} | {{SecurityFaggots}} | ||
[[Category:People|Rutkowska, Joanna]] | [[Category:People|Rutkowska, Joanna]] | ||
[[Category:Softwarez]] | [[Category:Softwarez]] |
Revision as of 04:36, 28 December 2012
IT'S A MAN, BABY!
Enjoy your cock! 8====D (_(__) |
Joanna Rutkowska (formerly Jan Rutkowski) is a Polish security faggot, primarily known for her research on transgender relationships and contributions to tranny trap installation and hiding techniques. She's widely renowned for being the first transvestite to admit her condition on a security faggotry conference.
Other faggots with computer security knowledge consider him to be hot and feminine. Dan Kaminsky is currently engaged to Mr. Rutkowski.
The trap
Rutkowski transformed himself into Rutkowska using a special technique called Blue Pill. She claimed at BlackHat 2006 that Blue Pill was completely undetectable, so in 2007 two researchers challenged her to prove her claim in real-world testing. Rutkowska responded that she would agree under a modified set of conditions:[1]
- Five (5) computers instead of the two (2) proposed
- No continuous buttsecks for more than one (1) second
- A payment of between $384,000 and $416,000
The researchers declined her proposed conditions.
How to detect the trap
This entire section is dedicated to help security faggots and unsuspecting passengers, for detecting the Blue Pill installed on Joanna Rutkowska. Shall you encounter this rare specimen of rootkit, beware.
- PROTIP: Beware epic trollface
- The chin is a big danger sign saying: root kit.
- The thing around his neck contains Blue Pill. It will instantly turn the penis into a fake vagina ready to lurk for poor virgin security faggots. People with real sex experience will obviously note the difference of touch and wetting and panic almost instantly.
- The TPI Industrial radioactive particle emitter is used to increase estrogen levels. This helps to convert the man boobs into small realistic-looking tits. Don't be fooled, they are more fake than your moms.
- The wig sticks to the head thanks to some chewing gum compound mixed with whale semen. It's highly nutritious for the skin and slows down the balding process.
I has stealz malware
Joanna has claimed to have stealth hax that sends Mudkipz and Splinter Rapes to your mom. It was later proven wrong by master faggots Thomas Ptacek and his overweight family. Fail.
Engaged to Dan
Joanna and Dan Kaminsky have been engaged since 100 years ago.
—Joanna Rutkowska asking for it |
Joanna Rutkowska is part of a series on Security Faggots |
1337 h4x0rz Captain Crunch • Cult of the Dead Cow • David L. Smith • Gary McKinnon • GOBBLES • HD Moore • Jeff Moss • Kevin Mitnick • Lance M. Havok • Robert Morris • Theo de Raadt • weev • Woz
Try-Hards
2cash • AnonOps • Brian Salcedo • Fearnor • Fry Guy • Gadi Evron • g00ns • Hack This Site • Hacking Team • hann • Joanna Rutkowska • John Field • Joseph Camp • Lizard Squad • LulzSec • Mark Zuckerberg • MarshviperX • Masters of Deception • Michael Lynn • Krashed • Raven • r000t • Ryan • Steve Gibson • th3j35t3r • The Regime • Sabu • Zeekill
Related Shit
Avira • Ciscogate • Cloudflare • Conficker • CyberDefender • Defcon • The Gibson • The Great Em/b/assy Security Leak of 2007 • Heartbleed • I GOT NORTON! • Is Your Son a Computer Hacker? • Operation Sundevil • PIFTS.exe • Social engineering • Stylometry • SubSeven • Zone-H |
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