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ISIS: Difference between revisions
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Sadly, however, if ISIS were [[attention whore|looking for attention]], their efforts are all in vain because all the [[hipster|politically illiterate trendies]] on [[Facebook]], [[Tumblr]] and [[Twitter]] are having too much fun whining about the [[wormy kikes]] in [[Israel]] blowing up <s>terrorists</s> poor, innocent, noble [[Palestine|Palestinians]] who'd never hurt anybody than to bother caring about all the atrocities committed by a bunch of butthurt sand niggers. | |||
==Airstrikes== | ==Airstrikes== |
Revision as of 09:52, 9 August 2014
Following the American withdrawal from Iraq, a group of batshit insane Arabs decided that they didn't like their government, and so set about creating their own, called IS. IS, also known as the Islamic State in Iraq and in Sham, The Islamic state in Iraq and in the Levant, ISIL,ISIS, Sweden, The Islamic State, the Islamic caliphate, etc. are a group of crazed sandniggers that are currently pwning most of Iraq and Syria. Like all terrorists, ISIS records its videos with potatoes, requiring jihadis from Britain to make their videos with shitty Instagram filters. The group is led by Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi(also known as caliph Ibrahim and big daddy bahdadi). Abu is a Mexican convert who was probably trained by mossad. Isis plans to create a caliphate that will spread from Iraqi/Syrian region to Austria, Morocco, India, parts of China, the entire Middle East, and Parts of Africa, assuming they don't get eventually rekt by Assad. They are even recruiting from Britfagistan, including 16 year old girls to provide jihadi brides. The anguished cries of "Too old!" have proven numerous. The group threatens everybody in the middle east. Although they seem like srs bsns they ride around in 1980's pickup trucks.
Social Media
Learning from their child brides, ISIS members have the developed a compulsion to post every aspect of their lives on Twitter or Instagram. Unlike your typical teenage camwhore, however, ISIS tweets tend to be quite lulzy, often involving the beheading of government officials, and the theft of American tanks and kittens. The holy warriors of ISIS may be brutal psychopathic murderers, but they are not without a sense of humor. They shopped a picture of the First Negress after stealing equipment the U.S. had originally given to Iraq.
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Batshit insane, yet still hilarious
Sadly, however, if ISIS were looking for attention, their efforts are all in vain because all the politically illiterate trendies on Facebook, Tumblr and Twitter are having too much fun whining about the wormy kikes in Israel blowing up terrorists poor, innocent, noble Palestinians who'd never hurt anybody than to bother caring about all the atrocities committed by a bunch of butthurt sand niggers.
Airstrikes
Recently the planet of the apes occupation emperor Obama authorized the use of air strikes against ISIS. This came after a bunch of devil worshipers known as the yizidi ran away from ISIS and into the mountains.
Achievements
They have succeeded where W failed by finding Saddam Hussein's weapons of mass destruction. No, really. They pwnd the kurds They pwnd Jahbat all nusra They pwnd the Iraqi military They pwnd the FSA They pwnd your mom They pwnd the Islamic front And they even pwnd the the economy by siezing billions by robbing banks and looting gold
Links
- chechclearisback Instagram-Chechclear is back ?!
- ISIS jokes about using severed head as soccer ball
- Islamic State of Cat
- US Intelligence are watching out for re-tweeters so go on a re-tweeting spree to IRL troll them.
- ISIS' twitter account retweet to distract military intelligence for the lulz.
- A jihadi's twitter more lulz on the security services by retweeting this lot
- More twitter material good for retweeting for the lulz.
See also
ISIS is part of a series on Visit the Social Media Portal for complete coverage. |