Wet and Messy Fetishism

Two girls licking chocolate sauce off each other. Not as hot as you might have imagined.

Wet and Messy Fetishism (or WAM, sploshing) is one of the most brilliant fetishes to exist on the Internet.

Explanation

A wet and messy fetishist gets aroused when they see the object of their desires getting a custard pie in the face, or falling over into a can of paint, or rolling in mud, or something stupid like that. Nothing turns them on as much as a girl covered in goo. Some even specifically prefer it when the girl is clothed, because they're extra-weird.

WAM might appear quite cute to an observer, like a reminder of kids' TV shows, wherein unsuspecting grown-ups were covered with slime. However, when other children were laughing and clapping at the sheer wackiness of it all, a WAM fetishist was having an early sexual experience - probably because they were being molested. For them, slapstick comedy is a porn movie and watching a baby eat a meal is child porn. The creampie is not a sex move, it is a sex toy.

The end result of a WAM video might look very similar to the end result of a particularly gross scat video. In fact, they're both very similar, except for instead of the 'actresses' rubbing shit all over themselves, they're rubbing chocolate pudding or maybe animal shit. To everyone else, poo-porn probably makes more sense than WAM.

Don't jizz on her face though, that's disgusting.

Porn

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Apparently this is sexy. About missing Pics

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  Diarrhoea porn?
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  Use a knife and fork.
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  I suppose there are almost tits in this picture.
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  AARGH SHE'S TURNING INTO A MUD MONSTER!!!
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  What really makes me horny is someone wearing jeans in the shower.
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  Our lovely 'model'
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  And some fresh horse manure
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  Don't wipe your hands on your shirt
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  hahaha she's pooed herself
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  Ugly skank
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  OH YOU LIKE THAT DON'T YOU BITCH
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  Tits or gtfo

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  Eww, don't you use toilet paper?
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  Now it's getting hot
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  Oh yeah, get that horse manure up your pussy
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  Remorse and regret in her eyes now
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  A pat on the head
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  You fucking deserve it
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  Failing at life
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  OH NO I HAVE SHIT ON MY HEAD
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  Yeah fuck off
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  Filthy woman
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  Splosh can suck a dick too
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  With their 'Copyright'
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  Don't eat it on the bed!
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  DOING IT WRONG
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  How do I eat cake?
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  As close to a vagina as anyone with this fetish will ever get.
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  This looks like she's been mauling a seal.
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  Ah, so THIS is how you eat cake.
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  She has speedy digestion.
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  Least erotic porn gallery evar.
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  Take a bath, you filthy bitch.
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  Particularly unhappy-looking girl.
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  She works part time in a nursery.
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  Interesting choice of boot polish.
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  Horseback riding is quite strenuous. So our heroine is gearing up with a snack that will come handy while in the saddle.
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  Classy!
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  Hey, at least she's not lying in a pool of horse manure.
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  Even Garfield has betrayed us. Here's some brain bleach.

What they say after they cum

	“	This reminds me of a milk fight I got into with my cousin when we were kids. I was soaked! My Mom was so pissed off! Only it was so much fun! Just good clean fun!!!!!!!!	„
	— TheRealTomTheMan68 has something to explain to his aunt.

	“	That has to be the the sexiest, messiest thing ever... But you could have actually dumped THE WHOLE THING on you, would have been much sexier.	„
	—Baldugorion's breath is heavy

	“	It has to be fun pushing her face into the pudding but they should also pour it down her cleavage and into her panties.	„
	—Summerguy51 likes his porn more hardcore.

	“	An absolutely brilliant, superbly slimy and seductively sexy dunking!!! Kelly pretends to be reluctant but is not authentic as she knows she is getting paid for being the colossal chocolate victim! I loved this so much I even recreated it myself and dunked my face into a big bowl of chocolate pudding! Cool!	„
	—Blofeld67 is a little excited.

	“	My goodness-look at her cleavage, should've tipped it down there instead. I'm sick of all these pies and just facial coverage alone. I don't know what everyone sees in it but MAN clothes getting filled and the body messy is so much hotter to me.	„
	—Not explicit enough for CurlyHayami

	“	Nice! The pie bounces right off her left boob! Well done!	„
	—This moron still appreciates a nice bosom.

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Clown Porn

I've come to deflate your balloons.

Some porn was never ment to be made.

Clown and ball torture.

If this was Japanese, the banana would be pixelated.

Or maybe they should get another job.

Clownilingus

There is an interesting subset of Wet and Messy Fetishism known as "Clown Porn". In this, all the acts are committed by people in full clown costume; maybe even by some ex-clowns who have ended up in the porn business. There is something particularly sinister about fetish porn performed by clowns; clown videos you know are supposed to be masturbated to seem to swallow your soul at its most innocent core. One supposes most viewers have been raped by a clown and are trying to get over it.

Despite how horrendous Clown Porn is, equally laughable is the website StopClownPornNow.org, a group whose mission is to bring back their fantasy version of clowns via the abolition of this particular porn sub-genre. Their sob-story about how clowns have been forced into this industry by a shrinking job market is particularly hilarious.

	“	Like all fads, "clowning" was soon replaced with something new that entailed another run to the mini-mall to purchase the appropriate accessories, leaving the old clown costumes behind to spend the rest of eternity on Salvation Army shelves. But this supposedly harmless practice left a sizable number of clown fetishists in its wake, unable to become sexually aroused without the fool's bells and whistles (not to mention juggling clubs and unicycles). In a fateful twist of history, just as these fetishists were combing the streets with their unfulfilled pathological desires, thousands of clowns were now wandering the streets of America with no place to call their own, no job for which they could be themselves and demonstrate their truly remarkable talents. More and more, the clowns and the fetishists were bumping into one another as they wandered those streets. Haven't the clowns suffered enough? They make their work out of self-humiliation, but should they be forced to go this far?	„
	—StopClownPornNow.org

RAPED BY A CLOWN

<video type="dailymotion" id="x8d9gs_clown-porn_sexy" width="540" height="650" desc="CLOWN RAPE" frame="true" position="center"/>

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  Not arousing.
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  The stuff of nightmares.
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  MOAR PIE
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  Looks like an evil alien from Star Trek.

Analysis

Okay, this one is pretty hot.

Some of them say it's about tactile sensations, human secretions, humiliation, or messing up the well-dressed, but in reality it's because the viewer is a twisted deviant. Someone with this paraphilia almost certainly suffers from an Oedipal Complex. It is likely they also fuck animals, or at least have repressed desires to do so. Certainly, their parents never loved them and they were bullied in school. They also don't know how to treat women, having gotten themselves stuck in the little kid method of trying to pull girls by messing up their clothes and splashing them with water. This will never work and they'll definitely die in a one-room apartment with 20 cats - cats that are still clawing at the tuna their owner keeps lodged in his rectum because he "likes how it feels".

In short, they fail at life and their fantasies will never come to fruition. Because even whores like clean clothes.

Maybe clown porn fetishists will one day get their way. You know what clowns are like.

Conclusion

HONK HONK

If you suffer from this problem, there are a few folk remedies. The first, and most obvious, is suicide. If you're too much of a pussy to try that, consider castration. Without a cure, you are doomed to live a pointless life until you die a virgin. With a cure, you'll still be a prick, but at least you wont care, because you'll have no balls.

If you insist on living with your disorder, you might want to use MS Paint to make your own material. Open up an image of a girl you know and use the paintbrush until satisfied. Then cry yourself to sleep because you know you're pointless.

References

• TOW
• TOW talk page
• Splosh! Perverts' Weekly
• Something Awful's The Horror's of Clown Porn
• Wetlook
• Porn Clown
• Tricky the Clown
• Lotion Play

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Wet and Messy Fetishism is part of a series on Psychology

Wet and Messy Fetishism is part of a series on Sex Visit the Sex Portal for complete coverage.