Kaliph Jamal: Difference between revisions

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==Back out of the closet==
==Back out of the closet==
On the 8th of July 2007 Kaliph sent out the following MySpace bulletin to all his friends and urged them to join his new myspace to see who his true friends are. In true Kaliph Jamal fashion he changed his fucking mind, what whacky adventures of hatred and destruction will he take us on next? who knows.
On the 8th of July 2007, Kaliph sent out the following MySpace bulletin to all his friends and urged them to join his new myspace to see who his true friends are. In true Kaliph Jamal fashion he changed his fucking mind. What [[in_the_ass|wacky adventures]] of hatred and destruction will he take us on next? NO TELLING.


===[[Literally|HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS]]===
===[[Literally|HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS]]===

Latest revision as of 18:02, 19 October 2018

Warning!
The blood of Jesus is no longer on the Page!!
Seriously, this guy has gay written all over him.
The blood of Jesus is on the page!!
Delicious BBQ. He totally loves t3h cock.
THE BLOOD OF JESUS IS EVERYWHERE

Kaliph Jamal or Soul Winner, lulz, is a mind bogglingly hypocritical evangelist Muslim from Michigan, USA who dedicated his life to destroying homosexuals, a.k.a. himself then changed his mind and came out again, but not before making the already difficult lives of fellow gays just a little bit worse.

Some may pity this douchebag but he chose to fuck up the lives of innocent people and act like a batshit insane asshole and it's not a simple thing to wash that retardation away.

Hypocrite

According to his blog, “Kaliph Jamal entangled himself into a deadly web of homosexual relations, spicy lies, drugs, alcohol, debt, multiple sex affairs, heartaches and heartbreaks.” He has self-admittedly had homosexual relations, (he’s a raging fag), yet now he dedicates his life to destroying the so-called faggots because that lifestyle didn’t work out for him. Butthurt, anyone?

He tried out being a fag, so why shouldn’t others be allowed to? Because all of a sudden he’s had an epiphany and magically has the power to know what’s best for everyone in the world. Apparently his personal opinion is the only one that matters and he's the only person with permission to be gay.

Responsibility

Kaliph blames faggots for his lies, drug addiction, alcoholism, debt, multiple sex affairs, heartaches and heartbreaks. It may not have occurred to him but being gay doesn't mean you have to act like a fucktarded 13 year old boy. Homos didn't make him a bad person; he chose to be one. Kaliph needs to grow up and take responsibility for his own actions instead of beating the fuck out of a helpless minority. KALIPH JAMAL IS A HYPOCRITICAL PIECE OF SHIT.

Some people say that Kaliph is only mad cause he couldn't get any of teh cock, which made him go batshit crazy and in one of his mad masturbation fits he had an idea. If he couldn't get teh cock no one else could! He claims that Jesus is on his side, only providing lulz for people who read his stupid shit and know that in reality, fags aren't to blame for his stupidity- your mom is.

His Book

He honestly believed that his book “Hollywood to Holy Wood” (looks like we have a comedian, Amirite?) may be featured on Dateline NBC, CNN, Regis & Kelly, Oprah, Dr. Phil, TBN, CBN, Good Morning America and any other Powerhouse TV Broadcast. He mustn’t realize that television is run by homosexual Jews who are easily capable of making the world hate him at the drop of a hat. Good luck with Oprah by the way, she loves the gays. Also, FYI, part of his book title is from a Marilyn Manson album. O SNAP!

Plz Troll

This message was left in BayHorseCrew’s comments during her great MySpace pwnage. This has sent his lol cow status through the roof as he was so easily trolled by the threat of homosexuality. He is clearly asking for it and you can help by giving it to him. He also seems unaware that it is physically impossible for a person to touch a Myspace page, let alone a page that is covered with Solanum from Zombie Jesus.

Nov 21 2006 1:30P

In the Name Of Jesus, people who touch this myspace page will be cursed! Touch not my anointed!!! I pray every demonic spirit come out of the person that touches this page. I speak the Blood of Jesus over there soul and they shall pay for what they did to this page! I command all angels to go right now in the spirit realm and fight for Jessica's life and soul that no more attacks will ocurr. I pray the blood of Jesus over her life and her soul,that no weapon formed against her shall prosper in the name of Jesus... I command the blessing of the Lord to fall on Jessica now in the name of Jesus. Satan you have no power and no authority to touch this young girl and I command you to leave in the name of Jesus!!!NOW NOW NOW No demonic spirit can have access to your page and I command Satan to give your page back to you in the name of Jesus!!!!NOW ...I send angels to fight on your behalf...... Amen I speak the Blood of Jesus over this page::::

The blood of Jesus is on the page!! The blood of Jesus is on the page!! The blood of Jesus is on the page!! The blood of Jesus is on the page!! The blood of Jesus is on the page!! The blood of Jesus is on the page!! The blood of Jesus is on the page!! The blood of Jesus is on the page!! The blood of Jesus is on the page!! The blood of Jesus is on the page!! The blood of Jesus is on the page!! The blood of Jesus is on the page!! The blood of Jesus is on the page!! The blood of Jesus is on the page!! The blood of Jesus is on the page!! The blood of Jesus is on the page!! The blood of Jesus is on the page!! The blood of Jesus is on the page!! The blood of Jesus is on the page!! The blood of Jesus is on the page!! The blood of Jesus is on the page!! The blood of Jesus is on the page!! The blood of Jesus is on the page!! The blood of Jesus is on the page!!


Back out of the closet

On the 8th of July 2007, Kaliph sent out the following MySpace bulletin to all his friends and urged them to join his new myspace to see who his true friends are. In true Kaliph Jamal fashion he changed his fucking mind. What wacky adventures of hatred and destruction will he take us on next? NO TELLING.

HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS

8 Jul 2007 2:28 AM

Yes I Kaliph Jamal have rent back to my roots! I have been playing the role of a person that Kaliph Jamal is not for so long and I am tired! I have been lying to myself....I am who I am gay! The boy that had a lover in LA...but tried to be stright becasue he thought (gay was wrong) did not work out...I have came all the way out!!!! So PEOPLE be who you are don't hide yourself!!! Your souls and spirits will fill much better when you are out!!!!

This is what I have to say...to Kaliph the superspiritual person

It's over now I can't go back to living through other peoples eyes I have told to many lies, and if you don't know by now,I can't go back to being someone else ,I never had a chance to do things my way So now it's time for me to take control, and I am not afraid to try it on my own I don't care if I'm right or wrong I'll live my life the way I feel, no matter what I'm gonna keep it real you know,Time for me to do it on my own....


My heart is telling me, my spirit is telling me Kaliph Jamal be all you can be, but be your self!!!!

Thanks for all your support!!! The record is coming out soon we are working on it NOW!!!!

Thanks Again for all your supprt! GOD LOVES EVERYBODY

www.myspace.com/theofficialkaliphjamal

Where is he now?

Kaliph Jamal went on to release a best-selling album in the gay community under the pesudonym Samwell.

  • UPDATE

Since his music career went to shit and was unable to handle having his art parodied by the liberal fucktards of South Park, He decided to jump back into the Evangelical Closet with a vengence. Possibility of a lulz from this NIGGERFAGGOT are high. His new Myspace is below.

See Also

External Links

Kaliph Jamal
is part of a series on
Islam
Tro0 Muslims [-+]
Countries & Peoples [-+]
Beliefs, Events, Traditions & Other Drama [-+]
Infidels & Islamic No-Nos [-+]