Dragomike

ATTENTION!

The subject of this article is a lolcow, and is currently ripe for milking.

You can help by trolling the shit out of them whenever you see them, then laughing at their lulz-inducing theatrics.

Experts believe that this is how the world will actually end.

How he probably looks IRL. R U HORNEE YET ANON?? LUL

Dragomike is part of a series on
FAT FUCKING FURRIES. ▲▼

Dragomike is an untalented fat furry artist, who like many other well-known furry 'artists', has a large e-go. He is a prime example of why fat fucks must die, since being big and fat is neither charming nor endearing, it just means you're as fugly as Honey Boo Boo. He claims he lives in Greece, which is actually furry for trailer park in Oklahoma. His catchphrase is "When power fails, fatness prevails!", which means nothing and makes absolutely no fucking sense. It's likely he believes (assuming he can think, which is very unlikely) that having a retarded catchphrase makes him cool.

	“	Yup Thats me! The Biggest Huggest Fattest Humongous obese Sumo Macro Dragon! I will hug you! I will smoosh you! I will Slurp you! and of course make you huuge and faaat!! lol	„
	—Dragomike, on himself as a fag. Please also keep in mind that this "man" is THIRTY fucking years old.

He also enjoys using various retarded adjectives to describe himself and others, and types like a retarded five year-old, as seen above. Another interesting thing to note is that he has a sweatpants fetish.

"Art"

Dragomike's attempt at something dramatic.

Does this look like 'doing it right' to you?

Using the word in perhaps the loosest possible terms in history: Dragomike's "art" is so horribly vile that simply looking at it can cause severe mental trauma. The vast majority of content made by him consist of giant dragons covered in grotesque blobs of squishy pillowy flab, so much fat that anyone and anything caught in its local gravity will sink into the flesh and suffocate. What a way to go, drowned in the fat of an obese scalie because all because of their insatiable luv for hot dogs and pop-tarts. He also likes to draw fat spewing out in segmented layers, like it's being held back by string, and 'toony' style heads that are so disfigured they make Garfield look like a masterpiece. Because furfags have no objective standards for the material they fap to, they flock to his art pages and leave hundreds of "WE LUV UR ART DOOOOOM OMG KAWAII ^___________^" comments.

[Mike_Godragar whispers to EpicFailGuy] http://i211.photobucket.com/albums/bb141/Icefyer2/Dragomike/1180915106_dragomike_world-in-my-fe.jpg ^^
15:10:29 [Mike_Godragar whispers to EpicFailGuy] what do ya think of that pic? ^^;
15:12:27 [Mike_Godragar whispers to EpicFailGuy] Heh. It's DM's feet with Earth. ^^;
15:13:30 ShyCorrel enters this room
15:13:54 [Mike_Godragar whispers to EpicFailGuy] shows how huge DM is. ^^;
15:15:16 [Mike_Godragar whispers to EpicFailGuy] yup. Not to mention squishy
15:16:16 [Mike_Godragar whispers to EpicFailGuy] anyway, gtg

Sorry mike I did it for the lulz!

Along with other fat furries (such as Fatferaligatr), he's obsessed with sumo wrestling. However, he's doing it wrong. Whereas Sumo wrestlers are morbidly obese Japs performing a traditional martial art for the entertainment of paying punters, faggots like Dragomike are morbidly obese furries performing buttsex for an audience of lonely people.

Because he is also a gigantic, bloated, faggy, emo pile of lard, failure, and AIDS; he occasionally dons the cap of attention whoredom by pulling something dramatic or emotional out of his oversized, zit-covered fat ass, as seen to the left.

Author?

He's sad cuz he has been diagnosed with diabeetus. :'(

Believe it or not, Dragomike has (on several occasions) tried his hand at fantasy noveling, with online fictionals, either about how evil hy00mans are savages and try to kill his human "counterpart", or about two morbidly obese, emo furfags have cave adventures. What you will find to be astonishingly impossible is the fact that he is EVEN WORSE at writing than he is at drawing. You can find out for yourself at his website (link somewhere below), but only if you are confident that your eyes will not be burned out of your skull. The first story is written on Microsoft Word, and is filled with so many errors that the program probably crashed over 9000 times while he typed, using the same grammatical prowess as seen in his description. There are so many errors that Word doesn't even bother to try and locate all the errors on the page. It's like it started to proofread, then just said "Fuck that, I don't speak no Engrish".

Hy00mans

We hate you too, you bloated piece of shit.

As stated, Dragomike calls any person who points out his furgotry hy00mans. And because his brother had an epiphany one day to rip up one of his shitty drawings and tell fatso to get a life, Dragomike then swore revenge on all "hy00mans" and then tried to cut himself, only to screw that up too and failing even moar than he already has. It's hard to imagine what his 'revenge' will end up looking like since he's still around, but he would most likely go to one of his childhood schools and go for the high score by being a fat suicide bomber like Michael Moore in Team America.

And he'd actually do it because he hates all of them... ALL OF THEM.

Even Jesus, starving children in Africa, Hard Gay, and you: Especially you! Furthermore, this means he even hates himself, and all of his friends, due mostly to fact that fat-ass dragons fail to exist/use the internets. In fact, he pulled the biggest Fuck you I'm a dragon since starblade wandered into the debate club 100 years ago.

Family Issues

Much like the band Fall Out Boy (whom Dragomike happens to be a huge fan of, srsly he'd suck Pete Wentz's cock any day), much of his emo comes from problems with his family. However, instead of maybe solving the problem by moving out which would actually make sense, Dragomike deals with family issues by badmouthing them on the internet, and making bullshit claims of being unable to solve his problems.

OHSHI-

Dragomike, his butt-buddy Tolstoy, and a bunch of their fatass buddies think that they're e-warriors, and have set up their own Juggalo group called the Anla Shok, to fight against the evil hy00mans such as Boy George, moot and you. However, Dragomike was too busy masturbating to child porn (he also does this wrong) while his faggot friends were in battle, and was subsequently party vanned for his fat faggotry. He told the judge he did it for the lulz and proceeded to rant about how he will eventually destroy the world by sucking it up in his fat. The judge told him to GTFO and lurk moar, to which he replied by eating the nigra.

Reaction to This Article

Last Thursday, Dragomike made a journal about his discovery of this article. His journal was pretty much a rip-off of Two-Ton-Neko's reaction. I mean, just read them both. They're practically the same fucking thing. We all know that if TTN didn't post that 'ground-breaking' entry, then Dragomike would just draw another 'HY00MAN HATE >:O' picture, though that would have been more lulzy.

Tolstoy also posted about it in his FurAffinity journal. Of course, then came the obvious and generic "those JERKS!!1! we r here 4 ur support" comments, as well as the "rational" comments, consisting of how he should kill (you heard that correctly, fucking KILL him!) his brother for accomplishing in a few seconds moar than Dragomike accomplished in his entire life. Here they are, for those who don't want to click on any diseased FA links.

Dragomike's Journal

	“	Well ok, now that was a hit that I never got in my entire fur life. But I am not writing this journal to start yelling and swearing the person that made this page with all those insults about me and my work. Quite the opposite! I am going to praise him! For many reasons! Yes! Really! I am writing this because I tracked down his Username and he is both a user here in Fur affinity and Deviant Art. So I am pretty sure he is reading this! I am not giving his name, don’t go on his page and talk to him, because this is what he really wants! But enough of that! On my subject now! I have to admit that I got quite a shock when I was reading his article, I felt down for a while but as I was reading more and more I begun to laugh! Yes! Laugh so much with all those freaking retarded stuff he was writing! I want to thank him for making this page, becouuuuuuuuse he gave me 2 benefits! You have no idea how much fun is to draw something and the person that doesn’t likes it want to just bash you away with retarded insults! Not only had he made me laugh! (First Benefit) He just makes me want to draw more and more and much more! (Second benefit) Soooo a Big thanks to you buddy!!! Ya heeeeee!! One more thing that made my day! I am going to write you a single line from his article! Check this out! “Dragomike is an untalented fat furry artist who, like many other popular artists, has a huge e-go. He claims he lives in Greece, which is actually furry for 'trailer park in Oklahoma'.” Guys!!!! Can you believe it!! I HAVE A TRAILER HOME IN OKLAHOMA!!! Boy! I never knew that I had a one of those there!!! Geeze that make me so happy!! I can finaly leave Greece and go live there! Hahahaha that makes things better for me!!! I can visit many of my friends! And FINALY Gota have that Pop Tart!!!! Anyway! This Journal went a little big, I want it to close it with a Huuuuge DM sized Thanks for all of you that Replied to tolstoy tolstoy’s Journal. Its so good to know that you have good friends that supports you. As for me Guys Don’t worry! I still laugh with that crap he wrote! I even wet my sweatpants! And I don’t have a spare one to wear!!!! lol Now I have to waddle to Oklahoma! I gota see my new Trailer!!! See you all!! And Thanks!!! :D :D :D P.S For all of you that i gave you the link and the ones that found the article please don't post any links here, for the usual Traffic reasons. :):) Thank you!	„

Tolstoy's Journal

	“	It appears that my bro and good friend dragomike was attacked. No, not physically but here on the net. One those pesky hate sites saw fit to insult and belittle him. Im not going to link you to it because that would generate traffic for this ass clown. It's always the same story. Some intolerant person just has to write mean crap about things that they are unwilling or incapable of understanding. Now, you can take this in many ways. You could fly off the handle and demand immediate retaliation; which would accomplish nothing (unfortunately, all that person wanted was a good reaction, which they got A LOT of.). You cant win an argument against a stupid person over the Internet. Just cant happen. Its easy to lob insults when youre hiding behind a monitor. Thats just being a coward (no, it's being smart, asshole). Its the case with the creators of all those hate sites. Cowards. Every single one of them. Theyd never show up to meet me or any one of us face to face (you wouldn't come out of the fucking closet to meet us, dipshit.). Cowards. No balls. No spine. My bro (coughBUTT-BUDDYcough) DM is a dragon of infinite integrity. He is one of the most wonderful and awesome furs I have ever met. No cheap shots like this will bring him down. Not in the least. Why? Because Shok dar is better then that. He will always be better then cheap anonymous insults. (Because none of us are as cruel as all of us.) Love ya bro. bearhugs Oh, and please dont post links to that site here. Thank you.	„

TL;DR: BAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

They are too stupid to realize that they are "hiding behind a monitor", as they accuse us for doing.

Gallery

The many faces of a fat fuck.
HELP THE POKEYMANS! STOP DRAGOMIKE!
This image is incorrect. Pokemon do not enjoy being inflated.
Once again...CRAWLING IN MY FAAAAAT!
Possibly worse than rule 34?
HAHA HE IS SO FUNNY LOL.

Fan Art

Add pixplzkthnx to Dragomike

Plz to be adding some pix now kthnx. Consult the image selection process for help, or just google up some pix.
Plz remove this notice once there are plenty of pix.