3GI Industries

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Doing it for the lulz money.
A more suitable logo for 3GI.

3GI Industries is a crew of young misfits from Milwaukee, Wisconsin that are infamous for ripping off the ideas of other YouTubers and claiming them as their own, most notably the real life Super Smash Tournament video series.

Ripping Off TV Shows

DO NOT WANT.

3GI began its career when the crew were all just teenagers who wanted so badly to be like the guys in Jackass. They impulsively began filming themselves doing a myriad of ridiculous stunts and public trolling while wearing costumes and using props, firecrackers, and other explosive devices.

Some of this idiocracy included dressing up as JFK while going through fast food drive-thrus and pretending to get shot after their food was handed to them, dressing up as an astronaut and walking slowly on the beach like they were on the moon, dressing up like a devil and hanging out around a church, and mixing firecrackers with bicycles and skateboards.

This compilation would ultimately be edited, compiled, and packaged as the Welcome To American DVD.


Teenagers + explosives = PROFIT


This stealing of other people's successful ideas seemed to be successful for them, so with the satisfaction they found in this rip-off of Jackass, they put all of their tiny, adolescent brains together and came up with an idea that would shoot them straight into the hideous, tore-back vagina that was internet fame.

Ripping Off YouTubers

"Creators of the Real Life Super Smash Tournaments and Shrek parodies." OK then.

The gang realized they had one main thing in common: they all liked video games, and they were all willing to humiliate and hurt themselves for attention and recognition. And with Grant's shameless theft of content, they couldn't possibly lose, so they banded together and re-created their own version of a pre-existing real life Super Smash Tournament.

This was not an original idea as it had been done a few times already, and they tried to be edgy and take it to the extreme by making realistic costumes, replicas of items from the game, and of course using firecrackers and explosives to make it more lifelike. The plan worked, as they have successfully brainwashed the internet into believing the Smash Tournament was their idea, and anyone else doing it is ripping them off, even if their video was in fact posted before 3GI's was.

The best way to describe the series in a nutshell is a bunch of guys in their late teens and early 20's with ADHD and too much free time hitting each other with baseball bats and electric mosquito rackets, wrestling around with each other in the woods, and shooting each other with potato launchers and other things that go boom. Oh, and there's a girl off to the side somewhere too.


This video was uploaded 3 YEARS before 3GI posted their first Real Life Smash Tournament
3GI's version


Along with stealing this idea, Grant is apparently also a big fan of RackaRacka from YouTube, who's creepy Ronald McDonald character earned them a spot on YT's front page. Grant not only tried to copy the Ronald costume, but he also talks in the same high-pitched voice and offers people McDonald's just like they do in Racka Racka's videos. How blatant can you get?


RackaRacka's video
See a difference? Neither do we


As if that isn't enough, Grant has also found a way to successfully profit off the pre-existing meme of Shrek by using crowdfunding to get donations for a "Shrekfest" that 3GI holds. He promotes this by rehashing outdated memes such as "Octogre" and going on about how many layers onions have, and even ate an entire onion in an episode of the now-canceled (lol) 3GI Show just to show how original he is with using Shrek as a form of entertainment.

Even Grant's editing style was ripped from the Tim & Eric show from Adult Swim, which Grant shamelessly owns up to. He honestly believes that editing the same random noise in and out of a video a thousand times is going to be perceived as funny and original, when in reality it's a stupid rip-off.

The Goof Troupe

With their relatives and everyone they went to school with wanting to get in on the action, there are too many featured guests to give a shit about, so instead we'll only detail the original major players of the game. Some of these people have since seen the light and abandoned Grant's rip-off act in search of something more fulfilling in life, and have been replaced with even lamer individuals who aren't even worth naming. But we will say that Grant has humorously found himself a "vegan bodybuilder" girlfriend who will likely have him sucking down tofu soon enough.

Grant, after sucking the dicks of the YouTubers whose content he steals.

Grant Duffrin

Grant diagnosed himself with Peter Pan Syndrome, and rightfully so. This anorexic manchild is responsible for bringing together the motley crew that makes up 3GI Industries. When he isn't rocking his biker cop mustache, he has an uncanny resemblance to some type of marsupial.

Grant Duffrin is basically the Carlos Mencia of YouTube, seeing as he has stolen ideas from several successful channels before him and profited off the theft. As the brains of the operation, Grant calls the shots, but also gets stuck doing all the work: making the costumes, spending hours upon hours on grueling editing sessions, taking the fall whenever the cops are called for reports of explosions, and paying for everyone's pizza every time they order out. But his name is still all over the credits and that's all that matters.

No one is sure just how much of Nintendo's dick Grant had to suck to become an official advertiser for them, but getting paid to dress up like Mario characters and act like a jackass in public is a pretty sweet deal.

Eric Nitschke

The pretty boy.

Eric's name and appearance scream total Deutschbag. This baby-faced, golden-haired boy was perfect for the role of Link in the Super Smash Tournaments, but not Grant enough to play him in the Link To The Future series, cus it's Grant's show and he's the star, bitch.

Eric's soft-spoken Euro-ass is always too stoned to utter a single coherent sentence during The 3GI Show, rendering him to stuttering and slurred gibberish that trails off at the end. Staying true to his Nazi roots, Eric posted a video of himself speaking terrible German for his language class. Must have been Intro To German, amirite?

Taylor Campbell

OH EXPLOITABLE!

Too fat to actually fight in the tournaments, Taylor stands off to the side munching on potato chips as an extra and looks amazed whenever there's a loud noise or an explosion.

Judging from his role in The 3GI Show, he's the biggest burnout in the group. He brings entertainment to the show by sounding a little like Seth Rogen and laughing like a baboon at pretty much everything. This, combined with his long hair, chunky build, and hipster glasses, makes him a fat hippie stoner.

Taylor also has his own bit in 3GI called "Explore Milwaukee" where he dresses in an all-pink suit and black fedora and hits the town as the Puzzle Master, giving troll interviews to local residents while unrelated pictures of McDonald's hamburgers and random sound effects pop up on the screen. At least walking around town is getting him some much-needed exercise. Interestingly, his YouTube channel feed contains only a couple of Bowflex videos that he liked, most likely to "watch later."

Your average gaymer.

Kevin Gonring

Kevin is your average gamer guy with an average-sounding voice.

He really is just an average guy all around.

He plays an average role in both the tournament and on The 3GI Show.

He will likely live an average life and die an average death.

The avoider of ladies and showers.

Shaun Stacey

Shaun is a greasy stoner with a geeky voice who looks like he hasn't showered for days on end (pic related). This is most likely a result of endless nights wasted on gaming.

He had nothing interesting to offer to The 3GI Show and was most likely cut after the first episode for that very reason.

Oh, and he was Pichu in the second tournament.

Kayla Bruss

Kayla Bruss = infected with GOTIS.
You can help by not giving her any attention.


Kayla isn't the only girl in the group just to keep it from being a sausage fest, she's the only girl in the group because she's the only girl that these nerds may have any chance of getting with. Of course this means she's equally as nerdy, as well as a bit of a tomboy. This is still a fail for the guys though, as none of them have the balls nor the experience to hit her up for a date.

She-thing.

Kayla is cute enough to be the bespectacled librarian in a typical sexual fantasy, but not experienced enough to make the fantasy come true. Too girly but not tomboyish enough to battle in the tournaments, she roleplays as the various Pokémon that emerge whenever a Pokéball item is thrown, attacking the field with smoke, firecrackers, and other projectiles.

Her voice was featured in the first of The 3GI Show episodes, offering a unique female perspective where she tried desperately to fit in with the boys by blurting out parts of the human anatomy, and most notably by reading a furry porn story called "Dogs As Lovers." She was later cut from the show because bros before hoes, and then promptly rehired due to flatlining ratings.

After discovering this article, Kayla freaked out and attempted to vandalize it by rewriting her section to be more PG-13, but was swiftly reverted and banned. After realizing how the rest of the world saw her, thanks in part to this article, she left the 3GI sausage fest to pursue better hobbies and asked that her name not be associated with it again.

Professor Jack

Game Gramps.

This old man showed up one day inquiring about the constant test explosions he heard going on in the neighborhood. Once the gang filled him in on the gig, he demanded to be a part of the action. The guys told him to fuck off, but after he threatened to report them for terrorist activities and shut their happy little project down, they reluctantly signed him on.

Old man Jack was given a pair of commentator headphones and a Professor Oak lab coat and was told to act funny like Eugene Levy in American Pie, but what he did instead was blandly point out the blatantly obvious and make occasional references to the family cat. They were wise to use him sparingly, and unfortunately for the Prof., they later sold out by featuring celebrity guest commentators in the third tournament, rendering him completely redundant.

Kayla would not like you to know that Professor Jack is in fact her father, Jack Bruss, so whatever you do, don't mention that to anyone. Also don't point out the strange coincidence that Professor Jack disappeared from 3GI videos at the same that Kayla did, because it's all just a coincidence, people.

Other Video Attempts

Sure, it's just a "costume."

3GI has attempted to make other video series as well, such as ripping off both the Legend of Zelda and Back to the Future with their Link To The Future series, as well as their own short-lived 3GI Show, but most of their subscribers only ride their cocks for Super Smash Tournament videos. Their fanboys even go so far as to comment "what about super smash guise?" on any new upload that isn't a Smash Tournament video.

Recently their fantards have been complaining that they don't like the new editing style of the latest tournament and they demand it be restored to its original ways or else. 3GI responded in anger by mocking the comments with their own individual accounts and even made a video calling them crybabies and telling them to dislike the video and unsubscribe if you don't like it, which they promptly did.

Half-naked teenage boys running around outdoors? Shotacat approves


Shout-out to ED, Where Real Gaymers Go for Research

Freak of nature SammyClassicSonicFan.

An EDiot discovered that Grant had mentioned Encyclopedia Dramatica during the 3rd episode of The 3GI Show. At the 2:36 mark, he says he did research on the wiki for none other than front page celebrity SammyClassicSonicFan.

Apparently he wanted to feature the ear-raping autistic boy as a guest commentator for the third Real Life Smash Bros tournament. This is comparable to Howard Stern bringing retards, midgets, crackheads, and drunks on his show in exchange for cheap laughs at their expense, and further proves that Grant will do anything to make up for his lack of originality and make a cheap buck.

Unfortunately the lulz couldn't be had because Sammy's mom discovered his inbox and was not too happy about having a random group of men wanting to feature her special son in their violent video. His spot was filled by a less lulzy YouTube nobody, and nobody ended up watching it.

Obvious Fetish Material Exposed

Blatant Sickfuckery

Grant's a big boy.
Taylor fulfilling a fan-requested "challenge" of jogging in a diaper filled with Cheetos until it empties out.

It doesn't take an armchair psychiatrist or a Fact Cat to see through 3GI's innocent "virgin gamer" front they unsuccessfully attempt to put on. Being young men (and a tomboy) on the internet, 3GI's main source of views obviously comes from the diverse crowd of sexual deviants that frequent YouTube on a regular basis.

3GI's childlike wrestling matches can easily be interpreted as thinly-veiled gay porn, and it doesn't help their case when they constantly feature shirtless cut scenes or entertain various fetishes in their videos, such as wearing and throwing diapers at each other, pouring liquid that looks like feces on each others faces, and parading around town in animal costumes.

Grant's emaciated body alone draws in a thinspo crowd, and Kayla's attempt at wearing heavy amounts of makeup on the 3GI Show begs the question of whether she wants to captivate the rare cases of heterosexual male viewers or send signals to her beta male costars. Grant's response to these allegations was that "no fetishes were intentionally being filmed," because it's simply "fun" to run around in diapers and create costumes which feature BDSM zipper-mouth masks for your friends to wear.



Begging for Pizza Money

Grant will do anything for love.
And we mean anything.

3GI's latest scheme involves begging their underage and sexually perverted audience for small increments of money by selling custom print t-shirts. And by custom print, I mean a t-shirt obtained from Goodwill scrawled on in their signature style with images of Shrek, Ronald McDonald, pizza, and of course their own hideous mugs.



Ringleader Grant is so desperate to get his fans to reach into their welfare accounts or press their parents for money to send him for these shirts that he's willing to entertain anything and everything requested of him.

The proof is in the pudding.

At this point in time, Grant needs to realize that he has a much better chance of making it big in the porn industry by continuing to voluntarily entertain a myriad of twisted interests for the online world instead of feeling obligated to make homemade videos with his friends and pets in the borrowed style of Tim & Eric.

Along with the t-shirt, 3GI also sends a "trash prize" as a free bonus, which includes random gems such as portions of the scripts used in their boisterous videos and actual dirty diapers, likely worn and shat in by Taylor after a routine night of video games and pizza.

Quotes

   
 
Eric, when we get under the covers, I'm like an animal. I give hugs like they're going out of style. My dog found out the easy way.
 

 
 

—Grant Duffrin, leader of 3GI Industries by day, dog-fucker by night.

   
 

I have a bathroom experience. I was probably 10 years old, and I was at my sister's soccer game, and I needed to you know, make the brown. I went to the porta-potty, and whatever it is, the pot that you poop in, was pretty full with poop and pees and chemicals. And then I had a very dense dump and the water splashed up into my anus and it burned really bad, and I couldn't really sit down for a while.
 


 
 

—Taylor Campbell, describing a typical fat guy experience.

   
 

If you have a dog, chances are he's practically your best friend already. He's more loyal than any man and loves you completely, unlike many men. He doesn't talk back or argue, and he's always there for you. Why not take it a step further, and let him become your sexual lover?
 


 
 

—Kayla Bruss, reading an insightful story on The 3GI Show.

   
 

We're all about the diapers!
 


 
 

—Grant, shamelessly setting the record straight.

See Also

External Links


3GI Industries is part of a series on

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3GI Industries is part of a series on YouTube.

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Featured article July 09 & 10, 2014
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