Fishtank

Fishtank, also called Fishtank Live was an interwebz-hosted "reality show"/"game show" founded in 2023 by Americunt comedy hack (and notorious terrorist) Sam Hyde, er, "Jason Goldstriker" and media producer Jet Neptune. The basis of the show was the dream of every OG-style internet troll and lolcow enthusiast: Get a bunch of autists together IRL in a house, remove their phones, and force them to compete in depraved challenges for "money", while people online watch the lulz ensue. The initial prize offered to the unlucky "winner" was a mere $10,000.00 of 'Murican money (which isn't really that much) - but it was eventually upped to $30K USD. This shitshow lasted for just a bit under two months in 2023 before ending its first season.

Season One

The first season of Fishtank aired in early 2023. Of course, it will probably never be topped by the subsequent seasons.

Meet the Losers, er, Contestants

• Jonathan – Outspoken lisping christfag with aspergers and a desire to start a modeling career despite looking like your little brother with a goatee. Most frequently spotted habitually doing pushups and reading books (specifically the Bible) to try and appear intelligent. His being on the spectrum is usually never ignored by the other contestants as he is the only one who will try to hold conversations or actually do anything. Was kicked off early because it was quickly starting to become the Jonathan show where he endorses Andrew Tate and insists Hitler did nothing wrong. Not interesting outside of Fishtank Nobody here is interesting.

• Simmons – Eccentric unfunny pedophile which is probably why Sam resented him specifically. Was kicked off the show first because he wrote a book about how to groom children at summer camp or something, which makes sense as he often troons out and wears womens' clothes. Anything else he may have done was overshadowed by this because the crew were desperate for something interesting to happen. Was most often seen trying to tug Jonathan's dick out of his pants or stealing things to start arguments. Trolled Sam enough to get kicked off and got every other contestant a 24 hour break with pizza and nonalcoholic beer.

• Josie – Clinically autistic kuudere of the house. Patiently observed the chaos. Was probably brought in because her fidgeting is annoying but this backfired as she kept to herself and viewers would sit and stare at her tics for hours. Most often seen watching Simmons molest Jon or spinning in place. Half of the internet believes she is a tranny. For $500 you can buy her a plush toy. Immune to pretty much everything that went on because she was constantly ignoring her surroundings when not directly spoken to. Won the game by doing nothing.

• Mauro – Morbidly-obese normalfag. Had no niche whatsoever and nobody cared he existed. Referred to as Snorlax because he slept 15 hours a day. Lost the game by doing nothing.

• Letty – REAL NAME NINA VOLYANSKA Disgusting e-thot. Would have been totally forgotten about except her pics were leaked by a vengeful ex. Anything she did on the show (not that it was very much despite making it to 2nd place) is overshadowed by teh nudez. Most notable achievements were failing to be more appealing than a retard who compulsively spins in circles and not succeeding in turning Jon away from his BFF Jesus Christ. Later regretted her decision to be on Fishtank and decided her time on the show was actually rape. Probably lost Fishtank because Sam realized he didn't want to fuck her.

• Vance – Failed normalfag who claims to be a method actor yet can't be entertaining to save his life. Most often seen being mocked by TTS because he's an acceptable target and even random internet speds are funnier than him. Constantly failed to get Letty's attention (who he clearly wanted to fuck) with Jon rebounding, which would almost be impressive if the prize wasn't Letty. Tried to salvage his place on the show by pretending to be insane but was too much of a pussy to make it funny. His time on the show is characterized by failed gimmicks that fell flat on their face until he was unceremoniously voted off.

• Sylvia – Fat ugly pig who tries to hide her excess fat pounds beneath pounds of makeup. Looks 45 despite being 23. Wet blanket who nobody liked in or outside of the Fishtank. Single-handedly convinced the show's producers to water down the TTS feature because every second message was telling Sylvia to lose weight. Also had her nudes leaked but nobody ever saw them because the words "Sylvia's nudes" are too horrific. A sad blubbery character with no appeal to anyone. Tried to make friends, failed and then whined on Twitter about how Fishtank didn't increase her Onlyfans subscribers.

• Damiel – Nobody remembers who this is except for the fact he's a plant on this season.

Season Two

Apparently, this shitty show was brought back for a second season in winter. The show began streaming on December 18, 2023, with Sam Hyde as Judge Jebediah Goldstriker.

Meet the Losers, er, Contestants

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  The original cast before Frank and Cole replaced

• Cole – A rich guy who LARPed as a detective when the show begins. Fall in love with the Chinese contestant in the show. He even cried when she left the show. Kicked out on day 10 for mentioning Letty's real name Nina which is a big no-no in Fishtank.

• Brian – The best looking guy in this second season. A rich frat-boy who suddenly became poor after losing his job & his parents refusing to bail him out. Joined the Season 2 show cast with the sole motivation of getting that bread!

• Shinji – A Japanese guy that became the audience favorite. He revealed himself that he had worked as a Porn actor in Japan.

• Jimmy – Randomnly spews Conspiracy theories and drops Redpills about the USA government, Nigger, etc. Has constant anger issues and threatens to beat or murder someone. Is also into trannies and femboys. Literally /pol/ personified.

• TJ – Nobody remembers who this is except he has long hair which makes him look like a Tranny.

• Summer – Crazy, BPD, and Coal burner chick who pukes and had a breakdown every single day. Left the show on day 5 after she became unbearable to everyone - including the production crew. Claims to have been raped during the show after she left.

• JC – Some Chinese girl who is the youngest contestant and also the most normie than all contestants. Left the show on day 5 because she wanted to save Cole or was too normal for this kind of show.

• Trisha – A girl who tries to fuck every single boy on the show. Possibly a literal prostitute.

• Megan – Fat, ugly, landwhale pig who (most likely) used to be cute before she gained weight and began taking meds. Likes Death Grips and Roblox. Left the show on day 7 because she thought Jimmy would kill her while she was sleeping.

• Tayleigh – Suspected to be transgender, and is also a /pol/chuddette.

• Frank – A fat black guy who was supposedly intended to be in the show-cast but got canceled out after he was discovered to be a friend with one of Letty's exes. Replaced with Brian.

• Cole – The original Cole, and looks like Anne Frank. No one knows why he was replaced or perhaps he is the same person as Cole in the show.

Gallery

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  This is what the show's producer actually believes
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See Also

• Sam Hyde
• Big Brother - the TV show

External Links

• Official Fishtank Website
• the KnowYourMeme entry on Fishtank Season 1
• the KnowYourMeme entry on Fishtank Season 2

Fishtank is part of a series on Trolls Visit the Trolls Portal for complete coverage.

Featured article December 29 and 30, 2023
Preceded by Internet points	Fishtank	Succeeded by 2023