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Sonic CulT
BREAKING NEWS!! Sazpaimon killed Sonic CulT and it's gone for good |
Sonic CulT was what you would get if you threw elitism, self-loathing, and furfaggotry into a blender. It was the best source of faggy Sonic kids recoloring avatars. The userbase consisted of angsty teenagers that constantly bitched about how much Sonic sucks now (not realizing that he always did) and a bunch of oldbies that bitched about how their community had gone down the shitter -- you can see the same pattern of self-loathing in 4chan's /b/ board. Acting like a Tough Guy Gangsta was also a requirement for joining; as most of the board still seemed to be following to role model of convicted rapist PACHUKA. The Sonic CulT community mainly focused on hacking the Genesis Sonic games and making the newer ones bearable to play. The veteran hackers of the site have all either left or are waiting around for the next Sonic 2 Beta to be found. The site was well known for organized attacks on other furfag sites such as the Tssz, Sonic Stuff Research Group, Sonic Fan Games HQ, Sonic Retro, and The Moogle Cavern. Also notable occasions were being cent cease & desist letters from SEGA for leaking games, in-fighting with it's own community, and generally looking like a web 1.0 disasterfuck. The current owner of the site is Sazpaimon, although the site has been dead for a decade.
Creation
Sonic CulT (With a capital T on the end so it matches to logo giez) was created in 1999 to answer tha age old question, What came first: Sonic the Hedgehog or creepy weeaboos drawing art of dickgirl Amy fucking Sonic in the ass. It was a collection of stolen materials from various other websites. Basically an early Wikipedia for creepy people. At it's height it was the #2 result for Sonic the Hedgehog on most search engines, which goes to show how terrible Sonic websites are in general. Stealing small parts from other sites proved to be profitable, as ad banners went up right away. The forum opened in 2001, giving the weeaboo fans a place to trade pictures of furry ass fisting and illegal copied software.
PACHUKA
The original owner of Sonic CulT was PACHUKA (Also known as RealaNightmaren) up until he got arrested and thrown in jail for the second time for some 15-year-old girl. Before he left, he was notorious for trolling the fuck out of the owners of other Sonic sites, most notably Andy Wolan of Emulation Zone, who at one point actually threatened to sue PACHUKA for causing him so much stress that he started bleeding out of his anus. (Note: This is true, not clever ED satire)
Scarredsun
Scarredsun was the second owner, buying the website for $500 in a scam auction. After a few weeks of fucking the site up, it was given back to PACHUKA for no cost, effectively meaning he rented the site out to a moron for a month. Scarredsun eventually would go on to clone the site and call it Sonic Retro.
Sazpaimon
Sazpaimon is the third owner, stealing the site from PACHUKA while he was doing hard time in the slammer. Sazpaimon effectively restructured the site to being uglier and less functional, and changed the forum software so many times people had to go elsewhere to post their fan art of Shadow the Hedgehog assfucking a clone of himself with his dickfingers.
s0nicfreak
s0nicfreak was a girl that ran a torrent site that was forcibly removed by the MPAA. She then fled to Mexico and started camwhoring on the forums in response to many clitpixplz requests. To make money while hiding in Mexico, she started an auction on the site for her used panties, which ended poorly. She was then forced to whore money off her boyfriend. (As a side note, the auction was not the first time she attempted to whore herself for money.
She eventually got knocked up and promised the members of the forums that she would name her child after Yuji Naka, the lead programmer for the Genesis (Megadrive for you eurofags) Sonic games. Noone believed she'd be fucking stupid enough to do it, so she wasn't paid much attention. When she finally did have the baby, she actually went through with it and made her newborn daughter's first name Yujinaka.
Naming her first-born child after a mediocre gaming icon is not the only instance of her creepy obsession. She also had Yuji Naka's name tattooed on her hand.
boobpixfur10bux
The auction for panties was not the first time that s0nicfreak tried to whore herself for money. Back in 2004, she tried to get people to give her money for [Tits|shitty low-res nudepix]. Needless to say on a site full of creepy furfags, she got the money before the end of the day.
Wetflame
Wetflame was a tranny/stalker/faggot/trap/troll who went from creepy to insanely creepy in a few years. His Buffalo Bill conversion was nearly complete when he earned the banhammer. Was known for stalking other forum members, going as far as to send them packages and call them until they were forced to change their phone numbers.
Ryoga Masaki
Ryoga Masaki is a babyfur, diaperfetish, brony, weeaboo, and general faggot. He was well known for his extremely disgusting and creepy behaviour. He was also well known for hiding images of a certain nature on his personal server.
Cryomancer
Cryomancer was a huge, round, fat man with little to no sex appeal. He was well known for his love of light guns and McDonalds. May or may not like dicks in his holes.
Other Members
- Borisz - Another admin. He's from Hungary, which isn't even locatable on a map, and is therefore most likely a communist.
- IUG - Anti-social cunt. Bans all new members upon first forum post.
- Kojichao - Fan artist/Canadian.
- Beta - Second in charge, making him a huge #2
The Sonic X-treme Hoax
Sonic X-treme was a shitty game that was scheduled to be released on the Sega Saturn, but Sega, already on a suicidal downward spiral, decided not to release a game featuring their mascot on their flagship console even though it was well on its way to completion. Because the game was unreleased, most of the site's members would smash their own dicks with a hammer just to get a chance to play it.
One member put up a torrent for a fake ISO of a beta version of Sonic X-treme a few days before April Fool's Day, one of the people who worked on the actual game, released some game footage to make the hoax seem more legitimate. Apparently the whole fucking website was ignorant of the upcoming holiday and thus went apeshit over the discovery. When it was revealed that it was all just a hoax, the entire community felt so butthurt that some began questioning their personal views of reality itself.
X-CulT
Even the Sonic community had grown tired of Sonic, and, thus, X-CulT was born. X-CulT was created for stealing shit, hacking and researching any game that isn't Sonic-related since the members of the forums needed something to do since nobody that remembers the Genesis gives a fuck about Sonic games anymore. Some of the games covered in X-CulT include:
Mitsuharu Takura
Japanese faggot and English butchering Jap was another fun addition to the circus shitshow of morons. Author of Furry Bomb, a collection of images of Sonic fucking pretty much everyone in his franchise. Scanned uploads of his books caused him much butthurt, going as far as to threaten to quit drawing creepy fan art of Sonic fucking Tails in his asshole.
Email Exchange
From: Mitsuharu Takura Sent: Fri Mar 02 17:07:30 2007 Subject: Quit to upload Furry Bomb doujinsies!! This e-mail from JAPAN. I'm Mitsu Takura,Furry Bomb doujinshi artist. My friends taught me my doujinshies all pages uploading in Sonic cult site. Did you see Furry Bomb's last page? I wrote"Please don't copy,scan,upload~this doujinshi!!!". Want you to upload Furry Bombs. Please quit to upload Furry Bomb doujinshies. If you don't quit to upload,I'll quit to draw Sonic adult.
Response to email: (Mitsuharu Takura's comments are in italics.)
Alright so let me break this down
This e-mail from JAPAN.
Holy shit an email from JAPAN. This deserves special attention!
I'm Mitsu Takura,Furry Bomb doujinshi artist. My friends taught me my doujinshies all pages uploading in Sonic cult site.
I'm sorry, I can't control it if all your doujin pages feel like uploading themselves. Maybe you should train them better. Your friends seem like they enjoy teaching you things. Maybe they can teach you how to properly train doujin pages!
Did you see Furry Bomb's last page? I wrote"Please don't copy,scan,upload~this doujinshi!!!".
Oh that's okay then, we're only uploading them not copying and scanning them. I thought we were doing something we weren't supposed to do. Phew!
Want you to upload Furry Bombs.
Way ahead of you.
Please quit to upload Furry Bomb doujinshies.
..but...you just said...Oh whatever
If you don't quit to upload,I'll quit to draw Sonic adult.
That's okay then, most of the characters are underage, that means you can keep on drawing them. Can't wait to see Furry Bomb #6
Sonic community takes a trip to bantown
The pigs have simultaneously shut down CultNET effectively killing 7chan, Sonic CulT, S2Beta, reportedly for child porn on the /b/ section of the 7chan. Obviously a republican KKK conspiracy. The coppers have reportedly hired Mike Sandy, the renowned haxxxxor from the village of black person. Also apparently the entire CultNet, which hosts the aforementioned sites, is down. Fucking pwned guys.
External Links
- Sonic CulT is officially dead
- Sonic CulT
- s0nicfreak's tattoos
- Proof that Sonic CulT/X-Cult is made up of furries.
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