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Justin Bieber
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This page has more butthurt editing than all the other articles about music artists combined. If page-vandalizing JB fantards are spotted, revert their edits and vandalize their userpages. |
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Warning! File:Logans claim to fail.jpg Logan sperman claims Justin Bieber made it big because of Young Tubers United on Youtube. Irony: Justin Bieber actually got big because of Ytask, a rival group which also has deep roots in pedophilia. |
Bottom: "Baby... baby... baby oh".
—Justin Bieber | ||
Diustin Biber formerly known as Justine "Ladyboy" Bieber is a Beaver-faced talented Canadian lesbian gospel singer who is the current wet dream of 12-year-old girls across the globe and has become this year's Jonas Brothers, and therefore last year's C Simpson only without the descending testicles. She is actually the worlds most famous two year old herpes sufferer, although you wouldn't know it from her videos and marketing team who are selling her as a 12-year-old boy. Chemicals these days...ahhh, science.
She is also a Jewbaby drama queen diva who's already acting like she's Whitney Houston. Her hobbies include twitter, being the quintessence of awesome, twatter, being sexually confused, shitter, not knowing what "German" means, moar twitter and making Protest The Hero angry that she became more famous than they are. And twitter.
The lil' bastard was found on Chatroulette by a talent seeker named Scooter Braun, who, upon discovering that young Beaver couldn't sing for shit (but not wanting to lose that mine of Jew Gold), immediately conceived the perfect, cheapest solution: autotune (see below). Since then, Beaver is followed by a myriad of pre-pubescent girls and pedophiles.
Bieber is also often considered the most romantic singer ever, as she dedicates a lot of songs to girls. Meanwhile, her legions of fangirls -Biebians- are all closeted lesbians or unwittingly bi-curious since they fail to realise that being in love with a shemale makes them 100% gay.
Recently, his music video "Baby" has achieved the most views on YouTube, proving once and for all that humanity is doomed. In addition, Justin Beaver-avoider-who-rather-prefers-small dicks hails from Canada. Seriously, first Celine Dion, then Nickelback, now this? You really fucked us over, Canada. Just for that, we're jacking up prices on our double-headed dildos. But, fortunately, on his "Baby" video, there are more Dislikes than Likes, proving that she sucks.
But, getting views on Youtube really doesn't mean shit. The video of the monkey pissing in its own mouth got well over 5 million views. Shit, that monkey has more talent than Bibber or whatever the fuck that faggot's name is.
History
Just like many other 'talented' attention whores who want to get noticed, Justin Bieber's mother decided to create a YouTube channel to whore out her spawn's alleged talents - singing and dancing - and fish for comments. After going viral and becoming Internet famous some big-ass corporate record label A&R guy surfing the web for shota pr0n to fap to, tapped into the zeitgeist (aka Google) and signed the little faggot to Def Jam. While at the facility to sign his record label, she ended up running into black person, who then took Justin Bieber under custody.
To 'legitimize' the hairdo, they teamed him up with IRL famous rap producers and stars to make records and vidyas for per-pubescent teeny-boppers to get their moist little panties bunched over and make their parents fork over wads of jewgold for records, merchandise, concerts and fan club shit.
Recently, shit hit the fan between Justin Bieber and his totally mature fanbase after an incident in which she was mobbed by fangirls at an Australia airport and had his hat stolen. Outraged by the loss of the only thing concealing his horrid haircut, Bieber posted a Tweet demanding that the mob of batshit insane fangirls should try to be less... well batshit insane when meeting him.
Controversy
Some argue that this is just another cynical, lame marketing ploy by the money grubbing Jews who run the music business to sell sex to underage girls and that the overt sexuality in Bieber's 'music', videos and carefully crafted image is totally inappropriate for impressionable teens who shouldn't be thinking about stuff like Canada's History until they at least reach puberty. Meanwhile, black people are butthurt that white people are perpetuating the rape of their cultural heritage as they've been doing since Elvis Presley. That is to say, no worse than anything else white people do anyway. Other than the fact that Justin Beaver pretends to have a penis in his videos, and does a very good job at it. PS: He is the most faggot person ever existed, and he should die in the black flames of anti-fag hell.. just sayin'.
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Justin Bieber and Twitter
Being an international star|gay, Justin Bieber's popularity|homosexuality can be seen on Twitter and other Web 2.0 sites.
The Trending Topics conspiracy
Justin Bieber constantly dominates the twitter "Trending Topics" list, thanks to the fact that (not counting niggers and Brazilians) twitter is entirely populated by 12-16-year-old Bieber fangirls who spend their lives completing Fun140 "surveys" with Justin Bieber's name in them. These surveys, once completed, post back to Twitter in the format "I just took 'lol if u met justin bieber at the mall wat do?' and answered 'hug him and DEMAND A AUTOGRAPH OR KILL HIM <3'," meaning that a vast majority of tweets mentioning Justin Bieber are computer-generated.
The conspiracy against Justin
Recently, the admins of Twitter realized that their current Trending Topic algorithm fails, and decided to re-write the way Twitter calculates which "topics" are "trending." This has caused Team DisBeliebers, led by the gayest twitter user EVER Bieberisafag to convince themselves their existence mattered. They were wrong. So instead of simply computing the most talked about topics on Twitter (which consists of Fun140 Justin Bieber "surveys" and "RTs" from pop stars), the algorithm now computes the newest topics being tweeted the most. Justin Bieber was not pleased to hear that his pedestal as the most tweeted name on Twitter had been removed, and lulz ensued as Bieber accused Twitter of conspiring against him because they "couldn't handle the Bieber."
Bieber's batshit insane fangirls, determined to beat the system, restored Bieber to Twitter fame, to which Bieber responded by saying (in typical Bieber hypocrisy):
—Justin Bieber, responding to his fans' determination to make him look popular on an Internet website. | ||
The Diustin Biber Conspiracy
—A retard | ||
Last Thursday a retarded 16-year-old Biebian from Brazil released a YouTube in response to a dis by Brazilian vlogger named Felipe Neto. Only she couldn't pronounce "Justine Bieber" so it came out as Diustin Biber. Lulz, drama and butthurt ensued and she made the vidya private but resourceful Brazilfags have been busy reuploading it and spamming up twitter making Diustin Biber one of twitter's hottest trending topics globally -much to the confusion of everyone else in the world. Meanwhile tinfoil hatters have been busy cooking up possible explanations to the trend including batshit insanity like: Diustan Biber is a new viral marketing tactic by her label and/or Biebians to keep la Beaver trending on shitter and that Diustan Biber is a gay Brazilian singer inspired by Justine Bieber. What's for sure is that Diustan Biber is now a meme. In Brazil.
The Bieber Hate Machine
Many of Justin Bieber's crazy fangirls use Twitter or Tumblr (well try) to ensure that Bieber never finds a girlfriend, despite the fact that he's gay. If, in the event that any woman even dares to pose next to Justin Bieber for a photo or sit near him at an award show, a swarm of angry fangirls across the Internet unleash a shitstorm of even greater epicness than that of Internet Hate Machine itself, bombarding celebrities and even innocent girls with death threats and demands to "LEAVE JUSTIN SINGLE! HE'S MINE!11111111"
But, the real hate comes from that of a black person. Usher (aka Black Hitler) is using JB to wipe out the whites by turning all the young Caucasian females into lesbians. Bieber only hits on the Latin, black and Asian girls in his videos (not in real life), so they [non-white girls] don't need to obsess about Bieber [it's all subliminal] and the white boys now are all hitting on non-whites in real life after watching 'Baby' and over 9,000 other hip hop / rap videos. White girls, they are finding out where Justin is in real life. This is only the beginning of Usher's plan to make Negros the master race in Canada and the United States. Phase II of the Bieber hate machine will occur in 2012, the year all of his fans (now an average of 10 years old) hit puberty and realize they are lesbians. By then Bieber himself will be doing blow with Miley Cyrus while they watch the next tween sensation destroy the rest of what they, Barack Obama, Eminem, and Osama Bin Laden started.
The Kim Kardashian Controversial Story
One day, Justin Bieber pretended that he was straight and tweeted that he was Kim Kardashian's boyfriend, apparently for the lulz, or at least the Justin Bieber equivalent to lulz. Nonetheless, this was a lie. The biggest Justin Bieber fans decided to send death threats and hate mail to Kim, resulting in a big story. This shows that fans of Justin Beaver want nothing more than hot, wet lulz, and that Justin Bieber's one and only true love is Christofer Drew Ingle.
Im 12 and what is german?
Last Thursday, Justin was on a New Zealand TV show for an interview here he was asked "Bieber is German for Basketball. True or false?". While we wouldn’t expect Bieber to know this, we did expect him to know what the word German means. Maybe it was the Kiwi accent? But then Bieber looks at the host’s card, and still doesn’t understand the word, saying “We don’t say that in America.” Typical to assume that the host is wrong instead of admitting ignorance.
After the lulz at Bieber’s lack of knowledge, JB responded on his Twitter, yesterday, claiming he thought the host said “Jewman.” (Although that wouldn’t explain why he couldn’t read it on the card lol). And this proves Justin hates jews, blacks and Germans which makes him Super Hitler.
Death of Justin Bieber
On July 4th 2010 Justin Bieber died in an horrific car accident while driving stoned and drunk on tour in Texas. Thanks to Anon anyone attempting to view a Justine Bieber vidya on YouTube was informed that Justine had died and they should check CNN for details. In addition, Biebians were also redirected to pr0n sites and advised to delete System32 to deal with their grief.
The Twitterverse went nuts and Justine's ghost was forced to deny the rumour [1].
It didn't take long for Justine to die again, this time dying of chlamydia after attending an homosexual tween orgy.
After rising from the dead shortly afterwards, he died again in late September 2010 during a 113º heatwave in helLA when his mother left him in the car without the windows cracked when she went shopping.
Justin Bieber: The Movie
In a recent interview with Teen Vogue Jewstin Bieber announced that he demands a movie of himself documenting his rise to fame.
—Justin Bieber to his Jew | ||
Sources close to Bieber confirm that the film will be released in individual ten-minute fragments, but the price to see the film will remain close to that of a full-length film. A fully 3D film, dubbed "My World 3.0," will feature 31 minutes of Bieber repeating the word "Baby" in glorious 3D hotness. The totally original plot and story arc of the film is expected to be a huge hit.
Typical Bieber Fans
Trolling Bieber Fans
The trolling of Justin Bieber fans is like taking candy from a baby. His fans will get massively butthurt over just about anything. They have some sort of disorder that makes them believe that Justin Bieber is some kind of god and that he cares about them when, in actuality, he will never give two shits about any one of them, and he doesn't like fat chicks anyway. They hold him in such high regard that virtually any mention of him in negative light can produce fantastic results. The following list provides some obvious ways to troll fans.
- Fangirls are strangely moral and hate when you swear at them, meaning when you tell them to go ram vibrating dildos up their delicate vagoos they'll probably block you. Now if you have lots of alt accounts they might instead resort to suicide.
- Call him gay and say that he has aids (Because he is and he does.)
- Call him a rapper (Because that's what he is.)
- Say he uses autotune (Because he does.)
- Make note of his age
- Tell them that he doesn't know who they are and will never notice them.
- Tell them that his manager Scooter Braun really discovered him not on Youtube but fapping on Chatroulette.
- Post a link to Last Measure and tell them it's an awesome Justin Bieber website.
- Tell his fans he's dead.
- Tell his fans that he died from AIDS.
- Make a fag username that Bieber might use, tell them you're him and proceed to troll the fuck out of gullible loli.
- Tell them that Bieber had been castrated before puberty to prevent his voice from deepening.
- Tell them that the reason why he's so short and never hit puberty is because he has AIDS.
- Impersonate as one of his fangirls on chatrooms, and claim that the other fangirl is a poser and fake while insulting Justine Bieber.
- Tell any member(s) of his twelve year old girl fan-base that he's a confirmed homosexual. (enjoy mass an hero)
- Hours worth of easy trolling here. Warning, mods will get butthurt if you mention anything that they don't agree with and you will be banished.
- Keep unbanning yourself from Justin Bieber chats.
- Post this on a fan forum: "Last week Justin Bieber collapsed at a party, and had to have his stomach pumped. They extracted more than a gallon of semen, I swear to god it's true."
- Post this on a fan forum: "Last night Justine Beaver confirmed on her twitter account that she will have her first baby. She also said that she can't go to any concerts for a while due to her pregnancy. She also claims that Usher is the father. They have a wedding planned sometime in 2012. I swear to god it's true."
- Make sure to let them know that Bieber is actually a population control tool. What the young female fans don't realize is that they are subliminally sexually attracted to Bieber because of his feminine characteristics, his hair (styled like many women), his voice (sounds like a girl) and his clothes are something only a woman or a skater fag would pick out. THEY ARE TRYING TO STOP YOU WHITE KIDS FROM PROCREATING. This affects the young male as well, because now he thinks he must emulate Bieber in order to look attractive in the now lesbian female's eyes. Thus JB is turning an entire generation into gays and lesbians just like NSYNC did a decade ago.
- Tell them you're Justin Bieber's girlfriend [2]
- Link them to this page
- Here too.
- And here
- and here also Actually one made by trolls for the sole purpose of trolling but should be worth some lulz.
- [3][4] Link them to these two videos
Further Trolling
A less obvious (but equally effective) way to troll his fans is to mistake him for a woman. If ever somebody were to mention good ol' JB in your presence, kindly remind the fan that her name is "Justine Bieber". For further trolling, question the sexuality of her fans, stating that they must all be lesbians for her. Also be sure to mention that Justine is bisexual, since she's had her tongue in Kim Kardashian's cunt while taking big black cock from behind. This practice works equally well in real life as it does on the internet. Be warned though, as Justine's fans are reputed for their animosity, and will more than likely sodomize you with a broom handle for such comments.
Results of successful trolling
"This is getting Fu*king old!!!!!! If like half of you dont even like @justinbieber then how come your watching his videos and searching for him all day and watching him? thats what i thought! SHUT THE FU*K UP IF YOU DONT LIKE HIM AND STOP FU*KING SEARCHING FOR HIM! you do know that the more you fu*king search him the more famous he gets, so technically your helping him get his fame and e where he is today! so i should really be saying thank you to all the fu*king fags who dont like Justin Bieber! HELL NO!! Your the ones that are searching him all day then taking whatever you find and turning it into some kind of... i dont know, something... and its annoying! now your probably like 'well you and a bunch of other people search him too, why isnt that a problem?' BECAUSE WERE FU*KING FANS! we have the right to! we dont take everything we find and make fun of it and talk sh*t about it! when he cries... we, us #belieber s cry... you fags just point your scrony little fingers and laugh! when he gets hurt... we, THE BELIEBERS feel bad and what do you guys do? POINT AND LAUGH!!! i would like to see everyone of you that doesnt support Justin do better! i would like to see you become as famous as he is and have as many girls OR guys druling over you! i would like to see you make it at least a week without letting the fame get to your head! and i bet you, even if ANY of you tried to do atleast the first 3, you all would fail! and let me tell you, you would have most likly (unless their family ...maybe)NO BELIEBERS on your side supporting you because you didnt support who we like and care about! you talked sh*t about him! and if you say 'i dont care if any 'beliebers' arent on my side!' let me just refresh your memory... THE BELIEBERS ARE MORE THAN HALF THE FU*KING WORLD DUMBSH*T!!!!!!!!!!" --@ItsCheyCheyBaby
Unbanning yourself from Justin Bieber chats
To unban yourself from Justin Bieber chats, right click on chat window, select settings, click on folder, move the slider to the left, confirm, then reset your modem or use proxy. Happy trolling!
Defy the Banhammer:
- 1. Follow above instructions.
- 2. Use a proxy, make sure the IP is unique to previous bans.
- 3. For Vista/Win7: Go to %Appdata%\Macromedia\Flash Player\macromedia.com\support\flashplayer\sys\#www.xatech.com
- 4. Two options: Delete this folder, or open the file in notepad and add this onto the end.
- @Y
(Copy line) then save. Should resemble:
¿ NTCSO � �www.xatech.com/settings �allow� �always� �klimit @Y
- 5. It may be a good idea to clear browser history too.
- 6. Reconnect. If everything works right, this will get you back into the JB chat. It can even get past being "banished"
- 7. Recount undermining the banhammer for lulz. If banned, repeat.
- 8. Requires a bit of persistence.
Moar Trolling
There is now a vote on Twitter for which country he will start his My World 2011 tour:
http://tweeter.faxo.com/Justin_Bieber_My_World_Tour_2011
1)Do captcha to prove your human or sign into Twitter account 2)Vote Somalia 3)??? 4)Profit!!!
Somalia is currently #1 with over 53458 votes thanks to the efforts of his fans.
JB is a cunt
On 18 March 2010, Justin Beaver visited London, only to find a huge crowd of retarded fangirls waiting for him. Somewhere in this crowd was this Facepunch forum member [5] waiting eagerly to see Justin. On a piece of paper he wrote Justin... Cunt!, to piss Justin off. He showed him this paper, but got no response at first. Eventually Justin saw it, and since he agrees on being a cunt, he signed it. But the fangirls saw this too. Massive butthurt was caused, since many of them didn't get his sexy autograph, and the guy had to run since the prepubescent girls wanted to hurt him. In the event he has injured his hand. In this video, you can see the paper being signed in the beginning. Notice the huge amount of pissed girls, when he was leaving at the end of the video.
—Justine Beiber being a fucking dumbass rapper |
JustinBieber.org
JustinBieber.org is a forum for Bieberfags to participate in the same Bieber shit they do on Facebook, YouTube, etc. However, this forum provides the faggots with a section to post fanfiction about Bieber. This being said, it is aweful. The forum currently has no troll and requires much more. All accounts have to be approved by a mod before they are activated, so try to make them look real.
Pattie Mallette supported Ytask
Justin Bieber, before being famous has actually joined Ytask, a big pedophile grooming group on Youtube. You can read more about this here.
Patty Bieber, who was posted here a long time ago, is actually Justin Bieber's mom and she has made videos supporting Ytask:
—How to listen to Justin. | ||
Rehosted because JewTube is gay, hence how Justin Bieber started his career there.
Pattie is actually a hueg Christfag and initially pimped out her little girl hoping she would get signed by a Christian music label. She prayed that God would use her girl as a modern Prophet Samuel, a voice to her generation. A youth pastor, perhaps? Or even a singer on a Christian label, she thought?
Sadly, (for us) God does not approve of faggotry so she had to settle for dealing with negroes and kikes when a deal with Jesus failed to materialise.
Justin Bieber gets hit by a water bottle
Anonymous bought a ticket to her concert and threw a water bottle as a point of disgust. It should have been a grenade. In which case, please point to the video below.
See Also
- EricDouglace
- Greyson Chance
- Bieberisafag
- Bill Kaulitz
- Almost rapped
- Britney Spears
- Jonas Brothers
- NeverShoutNever!
- Beastie Boys
- Eminem
- Internet Celebrity
- Ytask
- SEND JUSTIN BIEBER TO NORTH KOREA (fgt won't go cuz Justin Bieber Hates Koreans)
- Faggot
Don't EVAR See
External Links
- get some fappable videos for trolling groups in the favorites section
- posting clips of content found here in the video response section of justin bieber baby causes his male fans to jizz uncontrollably and his female fans to have an overwhelming urge to finger themselves
- Fan Site
- OMG ON TWITTER!! <3
- OMG ON YOUTUBE!! <3
- OMG ON YOUTUBE AGAIN!! <3
- OMG ON MYSPACE!! <3
- OMG ON FACEBOOK!! <3
- Fansite
- Chat room
- Lesbians that look like Justin Bieber
- Lesbians Who Look Like Justin Bieber Facebook
- Justine's Bio at manager Scooter Braun's site
- Scooter's twitter where you can see man/boy love in 140 characters or less
- Justine gets kicked underage b& from an r-rated movie, then complains cause it's not Chuck E Cheese.
- How many Justine Biebers could you take in a fight?
- another fan chat. STILL FRESH!!!11
- Engadget shows its support for faggotry
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Justin Bieber is part of a series on Visit the Music Portal for complete coverage. |
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Justin Bieber is part of a series on Visit the Faggotry Portal for complete coverage. |
 Justin Bieber is part of a series on articles which are the subject of retarded edit wars |
Beware all ye who tread here Atheist • Ape • AQ Worlds • Black Jesus • Christian • Chimp • |
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