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Polcompball

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You've heard of Polandball, right? Well what if instead of making comic strips with personified countries, you used personified political ideologies as characters instead? Well that's pretty much the short of what Polcompball is.

Introduction to the Political Compass

The name "Polcompball" is short for Political Compass Ball which takes its name from the so-called Political Compass. This so-called "compass" has 4 panels divided by 2 axis; a vertical axis denoting the libertarian and the authoritarian, and a horizonal axis denoting the left and the right. Any political ideology can supposedly be placed on this arbitrary compass and even your own political leanings can be determined by the political compass. If you place in the Authoritarian-Left quadrant, you are a communist. If you place in the Authoritarian-Right quadrant, you are a fascist. If you place in the Libertarian-Left quadrant, you are a pot-smoking Antifa hippy. If you place in the Libertarian-Right quadrant, you are a MAP Rights Absolutist who believes child pornography is a personal choice.

Polcompball Wiki

The polcompball wiki is a wiki-style compendium of all the known political ideologies of the periodic table, complete with polcompball depictions and aspergers everywhere. That said, there is nothing particularly lulzy nor interesting about this wiki, so let's move on.

Anarchy Wiki

The Polcompball Anarchy wiki is where things really start to get interesting. Unfortunately, as the name might suggest, this wiki is not actually an anarchy, as there's still rules and guidelines and moderators. Where this "anarchist" label comes from however is indictive of its creative freedom in which you are allowed to create articles for your own made-up hypothetical ideologies (of which usually wouldn't meet the standards of the up-tight provisionary Polcompball Wiki). Of all the cursed and unwieldy unions of ideological dichotomy, the highest gems of this wiki has ought to be the self-insert articles, in which users write about their own (usually out-right bizarre) political beliefs worked into an ideology that could only be held by no one but themselves. These self-insert ideologies usually fall into one of these categories:

  • Mundane: Nothing particularly interesting about these. Just some faggot with uninteresting political beliefs who wanted to make an article and a flag so he could join in on the aspergic fun with the others. Not even the communist ones are interesting. They are quite frankly not worth reading through unless you have a self-insert article yourself and you're looking for people to fit into your "friends" list.
  • Fetishistic: These ideologies are meant, in theory, to fulfill their artificer's perverted fantasies, and are usually meticulously planned out through a political process that serves or promotes their sexual fantasies. As a result, these people sometimes actually have sexually fantasies about polcompballs themselves. These ideologies usually support one or more of the following: naturism (nudism), hedonism, LGBT rights... well- maybe I should just list out a few actual examples for you instead.
    • Airisuism: (or "Smithism") is an anarcho-syndicalist ideology- but with catboys. In fact, under an Airisuist society, catboys will be bred in captivity so that "there will be free distribution of catboys to the public to fuck and/or date." Did I mention Mr. Smith here is a literal otakukin and an autogynephile, if that says anything.
    • Kira Kweenism: Another anarcho-communist ideology; this time belonging to a degenerate furfag. This article goes on to state that "A Kira Kweenist society will also have at least one worker-owned Himbo Hooters, as well as value decentralized redistribution of werewolf daddies and baras of all species to breed with the citizens of said society/commune."
  • Schizophrenic: These ideologies are some of the most crazy and idiosyncratic ideologies you will come across, often stepping into the realms of nazi mysticism, otherkinism, occultism, conspiracy theories, Aspergers, LARPism and sometimes even "off-compass" and "omni" ideologies (i.e. utter retardation), all culminating into the most absurd and bum-fuckingly stupid thing you will ever read.

Gallery

See Also

External Links

Polcompball
is part of a series on Politics.
Ideologies: [You are wrong!We are right!]

Alt-rightAnarchyCapitalismCentrismCommunismConservatismCyanismDemocratHippieLiberalismLibertarianismMiltopismNaziNihilismNeo-conPacifismRepublicanReconquistaSocialismStoner GuruTory

Issues: [Fuck it, Too lazy.Get it fixed!]

AbortionArab SpringBahrainBarron TrumpBirthCISPADeath penaltyDrugsEnvironmentalismGaysGeorge Bush doesn't care about black peopleGirlfriendsMarijuana AddictionGround Zero MosqueMarijuana AddictionMass ShootingGun controlGunsHealthcare (2) (3)• HomelessHousing CrisisHuntingIceslaveIranMarriageMiller TestMiltopiaNAUPimpin'RacismShoesTaxesTerrorismUnemploymentWarWelfare

Politicians: [Rigging Elections is funVote for me]

AhmadinejadAkinAOCB.AllenG. AllenAngleAshburnBachmannBhuttoBin LadenH.BidenJ.BidenBlagojevichBlairBoehnerG.BrownS.BrownBunningJim TraficantDubya BushGeorge H. W. BushBurrByrdCainCameronChavezCheCheneyChomskyChretienChurchillClintonClinton IIChelsea Clinton Hillary Clinton CleggCohenColemanCorbynCowgerCraigCthulhuCunninghamCurtisD'AlemaDeanDelayDuterteDwyerEdwardsFaganFiorinaFoleyGerald FordRob FordGellerGillardGingrichGiulianiGonzalesGoreGrahamGravelGreeneGriffinHagueHansonHardingHarperHarrisHitlerHowardHuckabeeHusseinJacksonJamesJidetteJohnsonJohnson, BorisKennedyLaRoucheLBJLottKerryKindKissingerKucinichLewinskyLiebermanLimbaughLoughnerMajorMarceaux.comMarxMcBerryMcCainMcConnellMcHenryMcKinneyMercerMichael BloombergMooreMorocco MoleMussoliniNaderNixonObamaO'DonnellOsbornePainePaladinoPalinPaulPelosiPencePerryPinochetPrittPutinQuahQuayleRasanskyReaganRendellRiceRobertsonRomneyRoveRuddRumsfeldRyanSaakashviliSandersSantorumSchumerSchwarzeneggerSharptonCyril SmithJacqui SmithSpitzerStevensStranahanSupremeTaitzThatcherThompsonThorleyTPMMuckraker MoleTrudeauTrumpVanceVenturaVitterWalzWarsiWashingtonWaxmanWeinerWestWilliamsWilsonWolfowitzXXenophon

Parties: [No beer? Fuck that.Hell yeah, a party!]

America's Third PartyBlack BlocDramacratic PartyHard PartyLemon PartyLiberal Party of AustraliaNorth American DONG PartyOBAMACORNSocialist Workers PartyPirate PartyZapatistas

Tactics: [Rage Quit.How do I get elect?]

2013 US Government ShutdownBlaming ChinaCaptain Nigga DefendaCloward Piven StrategyCritical race theoryCuckservativesDemockeryDoomsday ClockG20 Toronto LollercaustLiberal Butthurt SyndromeLiberal guiltMacaca#NotMySuperbowlChampsOccupy DemocratsOperation LemonpartyRaped StatisticsThe ResistanceUpworthyWunderground

See also: 2012 Elections2016 Presidential Elections2020 Presidential Elections2024 USA Presidential ElectionsInternet PoliticsPizzaGatePolitical communitiesRoe v. Wade

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