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Guilty Gear

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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Guilty Gear is a fighting game franchise developed first by the company Arc System Works, whose characters have been stolen by GG's younger and jealous cousin, BlazBlue. Guilty Gear focuses on dudes dressed like chicks in leather, big "swords", flashy and pointless attacks and something that BlazBlue also copied: varying character play styles. It also should be noted that everyone is gay for a particular character named Bridget, who is dressed like a skanky nun because of some paranoia superstition, and uses a yo-yo for self-bondage and hit people in the face with. Did I mention it transforms into Pedobear?


Game Play

 
Typical attack input in Guilty Gear

To play Guilty Gear one must have fingers or at least one hand. Once the first criteria is met begin pressing punch, punch, punch, kick, kick, kick and other random buttons till opponent is deafeated and then later fap to Bridget sprites

Plot

The plot takes place in the year 2172 when the Gears a race of Robo-angel demon machine dicks which have declared war against the humans who ironically created them.

 
Destruction of japan by the Gears

In the game Japan has been nuked by the gears and wiped out from the face of the earth (The gears were created by Nazi Vagina's and were responsible for World War II), thus the gears had been celebrated as HEROES but then the gears realized not to settle in the destruction of the animu-pedo chinks alone but to destroy all Niggers, Jews, Bible Thumpers, Vegans and Gays alike thus the human race stood united in opposition. The Gears were controlled by That Man, who is later revealed to be a Nazi Vagina. For some reason the characters in the game end up fighting in a death match orchestrated by the hands of another gear who wants to use their blood to awaken a giant sex toy that has the power to control other Gears and take over the world by destroying all Niggers making the lazy white man die from losing their slaves. The main protagonist of the game is a closet homosexual who try's to hide it with tight fitting leather and a big sword and takes it upon himself to stop the Gears and the Nazi Vagina.


Guilty Gear Sex

After the awakening and defeat of the Giant Sex Toy Justice all was well, until a new Gear called Dizzy shows up now every character in the game has to hunt down dizzy for sex and thus win.

Guilty Gear XX

A continuation of Guilty Gear Sex this game has lead to the creation of Guilty Gear Sex Reloaded, Guilty gear Slash, Guilty Gear Isuka, Judgement, accent core and etc. The only difference in each of the sequels is NOTHING the same recycled characters, jap rock music. In Guilty Gear XX a new enemy arises in the form of a slut named I-No oh no. I-No manipulates the rest of the cast making them have sex with each other, eventually leading to an epic boss fight in which the player gets their balls stomped. In the end she gets punished by the Nazi Vagina 'That Man' for inducing mass orgies and for being out of the kitchen. Also Dizzy being a total Ditz gets drunk and starts pwning every character that she meets, and Millia kills Zato-1\Eddie for the 10000000000'Th time and Ky discovers a secret organisation is making sex dolls that look like him and hunts them down so he can get a cut of the profit, meanwhile Sol does absolutely NOTHING.

The only reason Guilty gear XX had ever made such an impact in internet culture and anime is because of Bridget.

Guilty Gear: Overture

The game was an EPIC FAIL.

Guilty Gear Xtra

 
Note the Sloppy Tits

The manga version of guilty gear was released on 2003 revolving around two new characters Tyr and Mizuha but this never exceeded more than one volume due to its lack in story depth and overall shitty drawing style thus was just another in the long list of fails in the Guilty Gear franchise.

Guilty Gear Isuka the Downfall

 
Isuka you cant make heads or tails

In 2005 Guilty Gear made history by being the first 2D fighting game to introduce a 'turn' button and four player mode which lead to a mass Butt hurt among its loyal fans. In short a turn button is special button that should be used by players if they want to face each other in a fight, this moveset is completely unheard of in 2D gaming and the Fucktards at Arc Systems taught their bold move to forever alter the gameplay mechanics of 2D games would be appreciated. To further complicate the gameplay was the dreaded four player mode which causes a factory of confusion. This shit only lead to their Crash and Burn and caused a drop in popularity not even Bridget could save the game at that point. To add more insult unlike previous installments there was only one new playable character added and terrible shit piss music replaced the already unbearable retard music. Another falling grace of the game was that while every other game in the world was going online Guilty gear was happy living in the 1980s, the only retards who ever bought the game were japaspeak's and Otaku's for the gay ass characters.

Characters

Guilty Gear has shit cast of gay ass characters, also the males outnumber the females characters like every other game....

  • Ky Kiske - Pretty Boy and a complete douche and wont shut the fuck up about truth, justice and shit, is homo for Sol and collects teacups and enjoys a good Tea Bag.
  • May - Token Loli of the game and like's older men.
  • Justice - Giant Robo sex toy that is the wifu of Sol and mother of his childa, and main boss.
  • Dizzy - Is only 3 FUCKING YEARS OLD BUT LOOKS FUCKING 20. EPIC BOSS CHARACTER THAT CAN FLY AND SHIT FIRE, has good Tits but is still illegal to fap since SHE'S ONLY FUCKING 3. Most of the Guilty gear hentai revolves around her not suprisingly.
  • I-No - The only scantly clad whore of the game whose sole purpose is to please fanboys, is an agent of That Man and sworn enemy of every character cause of her bitchiness.
  • Bridget - The most famous of the Guilty Gear cast for more information go to Bridget main page.
  • Baiken - A samurai wannabe that pulls all kinds of weapons from her cunt.
  • 'Zato-1 - dead guy possessed by a magic beast.
  • Johhmy - A pimp who has a ship full of whores calling themselves the jellyfish Pirates, he is also a pedophile.
  • Venom - Has the gay for Zato-1.
  • Slayer -Vampire of the series claims to be uber powerful but in truth is just a twilight fanboy
  • Testament - Wears a Skirt.
  • Robo-Ky - Sex Doll produced by japan in the image of ky for the purpose of profit.
  • Zappa - Typical Australian citizen

Jap Haters

 
Daisuke Ishiwatari is a Nazi and plans to nuke japan he foretells the future through guilty gear

ORIGINAL QUOTES FROM THE GAME


   
 
Pathetic Japanese... It disgusts me to think that there are still survivors.
 

 
 

—Showing the japs are like cockroaches they can survive a tsunami, a nuke and even Gears.

   
 
Another Japanese man... It looks like they haven't all died out yet, after all.
 

 
 

—Gear expressing rightful hate against a japanese man.


Daisuke Ishiwatari gives everyone a view of a world without the japs through the mega jap hating robo sex machine Justice of Guilty Gear. In the game Japan is a thing of the past and what little japs that are left are protected as an 'endangered species' and kept in zoos were the rest of the world can look at them, separated by a 100 inch thick glass so that the japs can't rape your 5 year old daughters. It should be noted most of the Guilty Gear cast come from America and Europe, This conception of japan makes Daisuke Ishiwatari a Nazi and a respectable person who knows how disgusting the shit eating japs are.

Everyone is gay for Bridget

Immensely popular meme spawned from the love of traps by closet homosexuals in the internet and a character constantly subjected to rule 34. Roughly translated Bridget is a Pedophiles wet dream and popular icon of dick girls everywhere. Bridget is a favorite in 4chan constantly appearing on boards to the point of annoyance and be sure to know any retard who visits \b\ or \y\ will be welcomed by a cock sucking Bridget

 

Bio

Bridget was born in a village in England where the birth of Twins was considered bad luck and so his parents did what any normal parent would do and raised him as a girl instead. Bridget had high hopes for his future he wanted to be a bounty hunter not just any bounty hunter a yoyo wielding Nun Bounty hunter. Bridget sets on a quest to prove his masculinity by dressing like a girl and saying kawaii and playing with stuffed animals all the while searching for the gear Dizzy but fails, bridget then decides "the shit with being a man" and later works as waiter in Jam's restaurant(Whore House) where he services all the local customers(Pedo's).

Powers & Abilities

 

Bridget most notable point is he carries around his own customized robotic pedobear that can sub as a sex toy. Bridget's Pedobear has heightened Loli sensors, advanced speed for catching running Loli's and a built in candy dispenser. Bridget's pedobear can also fight back against would be cops producing sharp blades that can rip apart intestines and rides a giant flaming tricycle for quick escape(this shit is real check out the game). Bridget loves his pedobear.

The Gay Factor

Aside from Bridget the rest of the guilty gear cast are paired for the gayness. Guilty Gear meets the criteria for any series to spawn into a yaoi fandom long haired bishie's, muscled leather strapped douche's, the slender pretty boy, Loud mouthed tough guy and even the Long haired bishie with muscles that stick to close his freakin clothes.

Sol is an icon for gay shit, a personification of straight to gay on 4chan and gayest character only next to Bridget. Daisuke Ishiwatari meant Sol to be some manly testosterone filled roid rage but this fail only lead to a victory in the yaoi circles, Sol is now a constant fuck tool for anyone hoping to fap to manly 2D yaoi and instead of cutesy dick girls.

Gallery of GAH

[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

Cosplay freaks


The Fag Wars Guilty Gear vs BlazBlue

 
a weak comparison

Due to legal issues Guilty Gear had discontinued and its reign of faggotry had fizzled much to the displeasure among its loyal fanbase, but from its ashes rose a new and more gayer game then any of its time BlazBlue. On November 19, 2008 blazblue was released developed by the same retards at Arc Systems and created by Daisuke Ishiwatari this game was the recycled trash of Guilty Gear hoping for a new start. Of course the loyal fans of Guilty Gear could not stand it, then began the fag wars the fans of guilty gear could not handle the thunderclap of change that took place, the weebo's wanted guilty gear back.

 
Round One Lets Rock


On the opposing side the new generated fans of BlazBlue stood united against the fans of Guilty gear, formed from the former fans of Guilty Gear who have since defected to Blazblue due to its 3D graphic backgrounds and HD shit. They proclaimed Blazblue to be a superior and more modern up-beat game, but in truth were only hiding the fact that Blazblue has more Loli's and Tits than Guilty Gear and the lack of any outstanding male characters attracted Perv's and Pedo's by the Dozen's. The war went on leading to immense flaming and bitching spreading far across game forums to the even the lowest bowels of the internet like deviantart. Fans would show their seriousness by typing with their caps lock on. 'The internet knows no fury as a weebo's scorn'.


Both games still used the same trashy shit rock music and all the characters from both games look like they suffer from ADHD. Blazblue follows a plot of Science magic space time and other crazy shit although little attention should be paid to the story the characters on the other hand make up for the terrible plot, animated bouncy boobs and bare ass's are what make the game even sight worthy. Guilty Gear focuses on Bridget and wackiness with its original and out of world characters and more Bridget. Blazblue characters lack even a shred of originality with every character a recycled turd from Guilty gear or a reject from Sailor Moon. The average Guilty Gear fan consists of wannabe Otaku nerds complementing for their lost masculinity, Lesbians, Closet Homosexuals, Full time Homosexuals and Pedophiles. Whereas the average BlazBlue fan consists of migrated Pedophiles from Guilty Gear to BlazBlue, Lonenly Nerds and Fat fan Girls who think Ranga X Jin is kawaii. Both sides are evenly matched and thus we can predict the war can go on until the next game that pops out for 100$ catches their eye.

See Also

External links


 

Guilty Gear is part of a series on

Gaming

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Anime

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