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Laibach: Difference between revisions
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Revision as of 20:20, 25 February 2014
Before there was you damn kids with your newfangled Faggot Bruce and Dethklok, there was Laibach. Laibach were and still are just about the biggest IRL trolls on the music scene, if not anywhere in the world. If you can name a person, place, thing or idea, Laibach has trolled, or at some point, will troll the fuck out of it.
Laibach was formed in some Eastern European commie cesspool in the early 1980s or some shit. I don't know. Does anybody? Nobody cares about that anyway. What is important is what they did next. Immediately after they were formed they decided that their whole shtick was gonna be "Piss off as many people as humanly possible".
Problem, Yugoslavia?
The first major lolcow in the path of their troll ray was to be the entire government of Yugoslavia. You heard that right. And you thought you were so cool vandalizing Wikipedia and attacking the sysops. YOU ARE SMALL TIME.
Here's how it all went down:
- Laibach's first exhibit/concert/art thing/real life troll was baleeted by the slavshit authorities because they thought it made them look bad because Laibach didn't lie about what a shitty place their hometown was. It helped that their logo was an iconic artwork by an artist the commies had declared to be degenerate, and their name was the name of their capital city under Nazi occupation.
- At their next concert, the Yugo fuzz trolled them back with a vengeance by investigating the band and threatening to make news of lead singer Tomaz Hostnik's massive CP and bestiality collection public (Moar liek Tomaz Horsedick, amirite?). Out of fear of the incoming party van and facing a lifetime of potato peeling, anal rape and routine shankings ahead of him, he decided not to take a seat right over there and promptly an heroed.
- Realizing that shit just got real, Laibach showed their true power level and appeared on a primetime TV interview dressed like Nazis and started spewing Fascist rhetoric. Predictably, this troll to end all trolls caused the guy doing the interveiw to go completely apeshit, calling Laibach enemies of the state and at the end of the interview even begging the public to stop and destroy the group. It truly was a glorious day for trolldom and much lulz were had by all.
- Tiring of Laibach's nonstop trolling and finally realizing that the fucknobs didn't get the not-so-subtle hint when their lead singer not-so-mysteriously self-pwned, they dropped the banhammer on Laibach IRL. Doing what trolls do best, Laibach kept the lulz alive by using a symbol instead of their name on their posters and continuing as if nothing ever happened.
THIS BAND MAKES NAZIS CRY
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After the stunt they pulled on their first interview, Laibach decided to take their newfound reputation and run with it, refocusing their powerful troll-fu on the only group easier to piss off than repressive Communist governments, Nazis.
Just like any good troll, Laibach realized that the best way to troll was by appearing as if they actually meant what they were saying , which was exactly what they did at their next series of concerts. Realizing that their stage performances thus far were utter shit, they decided to study techniques used by a famous German stage performer and incorporate them into their live shows and CDs, successfully attracting quite a following.
Now that Laibach had their very own Stormfag fan club, they let the troll out of the bag and announced:
And the hills were alive with the sound of a million Neo-Nazis collectively shitting a brick wall.
FLAWLESS VICTORY!!!!
Little-known fact: during this period they also successfully trolled the Catholic Church, by naming one of their most fascist-sounding albums Opus Dei and putting a picture of a swastika on the jacket art (painted by a known anti-fascist). The Church actually tried to sue for defamation, but got their asses kicked out of court. Not surprising, as their best lawyers were probably busy covering for child molesters.
The Original Fort Longcat
At some point after they epically trolled the lazy, hate-fueled meth heads that make up the White Power movement, somebody took Computer Science III and learned how to make not only websites but those shitty computer-animated videos that were everywhere in the '90s. And thus began the age of trolling on the Internet.
Having been all but permabanned from Yugoslavia, Laibach pulled the ultimate "Fuck you" and decided to make their own LEGIT country, NSK, which stands for New Shitty Kountry or alternately, Not South Korea.
Laibach bills NSK as "The first global state of the universe". So in people-speak, NSK is basically irl Bantown.
It is also worth noting that they have legitimate passports that anyone can apply for.
Moar Trolling From The Pros
Much like any good YouTube pooper, Laibach realized that there were much lulz to be had from taking something perfectly normal and remixing it so it says something completely diffrerent. Usually this means that they take some shitty old song and re-do it to make it sound 100% more fucked up and you don't even have to play it backwards.
Shit that they have raped in this way:
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