Faggot Bruce

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Faggot Bruce is the hottest rap sensation to hit the mean streets of the internet since Yo' Momma On Crack Rock. His lyrical stylings would fall somewhere between Fitty Cent and Liberace if both of them were locked up in a supermax prison and were forced to be cell mates. The resulting mpreg would roughly approximate Faggot Bruce in lyrical content, "phat" beats, and a penchant for buggery. Bruce has made a name for himself rapping about all the current issues facing the gay community through the bastard child known as homo-hop, focusing on negro prison rape and ticklin' turds. What more could you ask for?

Dats Racys!

Naturally, Faggot Bruce's rise to internets fame has been marred by h8rs from the rap community. For the most part, this demographic is made up of prisonbait and sexually frustrated 13 year old boys who are uncomfortable with a strong black man tenderly loving a white man's wet, quivering corn hole, while they can't even get a crack whore to slob their knob. Hilarious comments can be found in almost every one of his internet profiles.

Vidyas

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Cockstar
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Mash That Dinner
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Turd Tickler

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Personal Statement From Faggot Bruce

   
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I aint gon write some bullshit like all the other herbs on this site. I make raps cause most radio ho's can't put it down like this. Thugs can go the other way too, and I do. I aint no gangsta, I'm my own boss. No sets, no hoods, nathin.

Don't e-mail me askin' me where I'm from. Don't ask me my real name or where I lay my head. I am the Alpha and Omega. I am you, your mother, and that hot trick down the street at the same time. Bruce is a way of life son.

Enjoy this, or I will empty a clip into you.

Kisses
 

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— Bruce

Lyrics Sample

The Faggot Bruce
   
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(lickin' on a cock)You grip it then you kiss it
(lickin' on a cock and balls)I'm gon' stick it
(lickin' on a cock)It's time for abuse
F A double G O T this is Bruce
(lickin' on a cock)You grip it then you kiss it
(if it aint swole)Then punch the tip and twist it
(lickin' on a cock)It's time for abuse
F A double G O T this is Bruce
 
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—Faggot Bruce

Faggot Bruce IRL

Let's face it: This is basically the gay, negroid version of Group X, Arabian Rap Sensation or Tai Mai Shu for the under-18 crowd who can't remember that this sort of shit is just a few overweight white dudes pretending to be ethnic minority rappers for the lulz.

While Bruce is currently loved by all internet netizens, this will only last as long as he remains anonymous. Once internet liberals find out he's actually a straight white guy Bruce is expected to be prosecuted for hate crimes.

And you know what? He's still better than Samwell.

What the fans are saying

   
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this guy is absolutely not the real deal… he’s a total novelty act… no one in the world would rap like this without it being a total joke… his stuff is hilarious
 

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— Wow, a user that doesn't think Faggot Bruce will rape him in prison

   
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Who is FaggotBruce? A homo-erotic vigilante watching over the ghettos protecting the interests of the noble rapfag community?A shadow we can lean to in the midst of the syphilis-stained crimson night? or a sociopathic criminal rapist that won´t hesitate to anally penetrate our delightfully virgin rectums to death? I think it´s a question that we and future generations have to ask ourselves as history unravels. Until then, all we have is a name.......
 

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— TehUltraChancellor, a jewtuber who thinks Faggot Bruce will penetrate your virgin rectum to death

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External Links

Featured article December 17, 2009
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