Simple Wikipedia

I don't understand this article! What is this sex you speak of?

An word does not like.[https://simple.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Asshole&oldid=1484253

Simple Wikipedia is a Wikipedia that supposedly is for people learning the English language. In actuality, it serves as a place where Jimbocrats try to make another shithole club. It uses English for babies & English for super retards and makes ESL students really look like idiots by saying that English learners actually involve themselves in this crap. It is used if the real wiki article is TL;DR. Some of the wikipedo aka wikidiots who cant make on normal wikipedia, end up here in the land of simple stupidity.

Commendations

The creation of Simple Wikipedia was applauded by the Down Syndrome Society, George W. Bush and at least 100 LiveJournal communities.

Criticism

Answering the inquiry if Simple Wikipedia was a joke, another user responded:

No it is far from a joke. I go there, and I work hard there, don't call it a joke. It's very helpful to people. I showed it to some of the people here in rehab and they use simple English Wikipedia. You people are mean, its just for help with young children, and people like those that take part in ESOL.

(Note: it seems doubtful that emaciated junkies in rehab would show any interest in anything, no matter how 'simply' presented it was)

Apart from being laughed at, Simple Wikipedia has called upon the scorn of philosophers all over the world by referring to philosophy as abstract ideas.

Simple Wikipedia has also garnered its fair share of controversy. The most infamous case is that of Bradd Gimpy, a 13 year old boy from Oniontown who had an IQ of 34. While Bradd's parents were having sexual intercourse in the adjoining room, Bradd started surfing Simple Wikipedia by himself. This proved to be the last thing Bradd would ever do; Bradd became so excited about 'wikuhpedia durr speakung muh ung languiguhh uh' (his words, not ours), that he dragged the computer monitor onto himself. Bradd died in hospital at least 100 hours later due to internal bleeding.

This horrible incident led many doctors specialized in mental health to dismiss Simple Wikipedia as dangerous towards those who suffer from a mental handicap. This has caused a schism in the psychiatric community, which in turn has caused many firefights between psychiatrists.

Some electricians have voiced concern over the rise of blackouts across the world due to retards flocking to Simple Wikipedia. This can be attributed to many Simple Wikipedia-users' habit of drooling into the keyboards, therefore causing power grids to lock down, and leaving many citizens without electricity.

Others think that it serves as a platform for bullying anyone who doesn't agree with the most popular admin clique and their dickhead followers. Anyone who doesn't do what the suck-up-to-Jimbo wants them to do gets treated like a witch on Simple English Wikipedia.

'Simple Wikipedia' and technological advancement

Not too long ago, some argued that the effects of technological advancement would make humanity lazy, fat and dumb. They were proven wrong by the fact that today's inhabitants of Kansas are lazy, fat and dumb without having any form of technological advancement for at least 100 years.

In fact, Simple Wikipedia is a sign that humanity is getting even more fucked up. We all know that retards aren't 'stupid'; retards are just habitually lazy and mean, just like fat people.

Basically, this site is trying to teach them "The Basics", which many people of that mental capacity were once not allowed access.

'Simple Wikipedia' as a sign of the impending Apocalypse

References to intellectual decay are found in all the world's holy books. For that reason, some argue that the creation of 'Simple Wikipedia' is a sign of the impending Apocalypse.

Many christians deem Jimbo Wales to be the Antichrist after finding '666' embedded deep in Simple Wikipedia's coding, and Abdul Hamid Al-Salami's Al-Falfa movement has declared a jihad on Simple Wikipedia, stating that it was invented by Satan to draw people into its Claw Of Intellectual Numbness in the wake of the Djahim, the Muslim version of the apocalypse.

Simple Wikipedia nearly came to an end when bureaucratic fuck Netoholic was raped and desysopped.

Simplism

Simple Wikipedia gave rise to the religion now known as Simplism. It is mostly practiced by fat goths who are tired of pretending to know all about Ayn Rand and Nietzsche. Instead, they consider Simple Wikipedia to be the one and only way to intellectual salvation. When confronted with arguments on the degenerative side-effects of reading Simple Wikipedia, they answer that it is fun to know a lot of very special things in simple English!

Meet the Christian Clique

Recently, a user named ChristianMan16, banned on the English Wikipedia as HornetMan16, came to the idiot hole. Later on, two more editors arrived, all with the same viewpoints (Christian, USA conservative, and nutty racist retards) and communicated with each other, like a big MySpace network of sucky shit. They all edited similar articles, and made friends. There's for writing an encyclopedia! But the retards at SEW actually tolerated this, as it was actually an improvement (which is not much of an accomplishment).

Stats

Up to date, there are 18 active bureaucratic fucks in Simple. Two are bureaucrats Blockinblox and Archer7. There is also Creol, a retard who was sysopped after two times of crying out loud: "God Save The Wiki"! and Vector, an Italian is also known for his simple English.

External Links

• A DURRRR
• It acknowledges our .se branch, unlike the English Wikipedia - and even links to it!
• Simple Wikipedia on drugs - Slightly better than the ED article on the same
• Simple English GFDL - Sucks goat shlong, which seems ironic but probably isn't
• Bureaucratic Fucks on Simple

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Simple Wikipedia is a part of a series on Wikis

Simple Wikipedia is part of a series on Wikipedia Visit the Wikipedia Portal for complete coverage.