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Encyclopedia Dramatica

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Serving 16,104 articles since December 10th, 2004

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Carmageddon Edition

Article of the Now

Suicide

Suicide is not the only way out of this earthly pilgrimage to eternity.

Let's be truthful here; you decided to see this page because you're depressed, or someone linked you here because they know what a waste of oxygen you are, or you just discovered gay dog porn exists, or you have been raped by Sharjah ruler Mossad friends when you were in 7th grade after being told to go to a small room by an affiliated teacher and there is nothing you can do because Sheikh Sultan is over the law. Your life is shit and you are seeking some kind of psychological sympathetic buttsex to encourage you to continue living on about your pathetic, meaningless, sorry ass excuse of a life...

Well, guess what, dear? If that is what you were looking for, then you have come to the right site. We're here to help!

Or if you have some friend or loved one who's feeling so down and low that they feel they cannot go on any longer, please send them the link to this page. It could give them some encouraging insight on their decision.

With all of that said, we would kindly ask that you'd please pay attention closely...

The brave act of suicide is a process of moral redemption. If you dispel the surface pleasantries in your life for long enough to realize your utter irrelevance and worthlessness, you will immediately see that the only solution lies in the absolute and irreversible pwnage of yourself IRL, in which you may, if you're lucky, become an hero to those still dwelling in the real world and, for the first (and only) time in your life, achieve something of worth. It is the equivalent of flipping over the Monopoly board. Contrary to popular belief, this also stops you from posting online. You will achieve an Hero status immediately through suicide.

(( It's During The Holidays That Suicide Rates Increase. Be creative When You Become An Hero ))


What have I missed?	Ae-tan 2 days ago	Azn 4 days ago	Randy Robert Stair 6 days ago

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Quote of the Now

	“	The sun's not yellow, it's chicken	„
	—Bob Dylan

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Picture of the Now

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Video of the Now

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Portals

Did You Know...

From Encyclopædia Dramatica's endless supply of factoids:

... that the Internet Archive got haxxored recently, not once, but twice? (See 31 million of you on HIBP!)
... that a Trump sign started a shoot out in Las Vegas?
... that the 2024 USA Presidential Elections are now in full swing? Feel free to document teh election dramaz accordingly, as it is dished out!
... that Doge has died?
... that Iran's president has died in a helicopter crash?
... that encyclopediadramatica.online died because the new owner hid like a bitch and let it die? Spread the word about edramatica.com
... rapper P Diddy has been arrested and denied bail?
... that encyclopediadramatica.win died (FOR REAL THIS TIME AS OF OCTOBER 4, 2024, PUT ON CLIENTHOLD BY CLOUDFLARE), all .win refugees are welcome to join the REAL ED
... that Liam Payne ( The One Direction Faggot) died in Argentina after falling from a balcony; If it was an attempt at being an hero is unknown.

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-<div style="font-size:8pt; text-align: center;">[[ED:AOTNS|Suggest a Featured Article]] &bull; [[ED:AOTN|View the AOTN Archives]]</div>
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