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Paul the Psychic Octopus: Difference between revisions
imported>Oddguy |
imported>Sidecar + 1 new pic (japs eat "paul ii") & minor overhaul (still a fucking mess though) |
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{{achtung|''' On 26th October 2010 Paul [[L. Ron Hubbard|left his mortal body]], fused with the universe and is now ready to become our beloved, mind controlling overlord!'''}} | {{achtung|''' On 26th October 2010 Paul [[L. Ron Hubbard|left his mortal body]], fused with the universe and is now ready to become our beloved, mind controlling overlord!'''}} | ||
<center><pre> | <center><pre> | ||
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[[File:Pauls_spain_flag.jpg|thumb|Spain redesigned its flag after Paul helped them <strike>beat Germany</strike> win the World Cup.]] | [[File:Pauls_spain_flag.jpg|thumb|Spain redesigned its flag after Paul helped them <strike>beat Germany</strike> win the World Cup.]] | ||
[[File:Paul_deal_with_it.jpg|thumb|[[U MAD]]?]] | |||
[[File:TIME paul.jpg|thumb|left|Fuck [[moot]], and fuck [[you]]. Paul is ''Time'''s all time [[winrar]].]] | [[File:TIME paul.jpg|thumb|left|Fuck [[moot]], and fuck [[you]]. Paul is ''Time'''s all time [[winrar]].]] | ||
[[File:Paul_has_chosen.png|thumb|left|[[Deal with it]]!]] | [[File:Paul_has_chosen.png|thumb|left|[[Deal with it]]!]] | ||
[[File:Sir_paul_chillin.jpg|thumb|Sir Paul is [[so cash|chillin']].]] | |||
[[File:Cook_paul.jpg|thumb|left|300px|'''Cook''' Paul? [[HATERS GONNA HATE]]!]] | [[File:Cook_paul.jpg|thumb|left|300px|'''Cook''' Paul? [[HATERS GONNA HATE]]!]] | ||
'''Paul''' was an English psychic [[Cthulhu|octopus]] beloved by [[4chan]]'s /[[sp]]/artans, who lived at the Sea Life Aquarium in Oberhausen of [[Germany]], that had been employed to pick the winners during the [[2010 World Cup]]. His selections during the round-robin, group play and quarter-finals have been right on-the-money 100% of the time making him moar successful than every single sportscaster and [[Usi|self-proclaimed "expert"]] thus far. He was also 80% at the Euro 2008. | '''Paul''' was an English psychic [[Cthulhu|octopus]] beloved by [[4chan]]'s /[[sp]]/artans, who lived at the Sea Life Aquarium in Oberhausen of [[Germany]], that had been employed to pick the winners during the [[2010 World Cup]]. His selections during the round-robin, group play and quarter-finals have been right on-the-money 100% of the time making him moar successful than every single sportscaster and [[Usi|self-proclaimed "expert"]] thus far. He was also 80% at the Euro 2008. | ||
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File:Paul tribs.png | File:Paul tribs.png | ||
File:Hokusai1814octopus.jpg |Rule 34´d since 1814. | File:Hokusai1814octopus.jpg |Rule 34´d since 1814. | ||
File:Paulfakery.jpg|/[[sp]]/ shoop in the news. | |||
</gallery>}} | </gallery>}} | ||
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==External Links== | ==External Links== | ||
[[File:Japs eat psychic world cup-predicting octopus - daily mail (july 2, 2018).png|thumb|right|2018: A challenger disappears]] | |||
* [http://www.youtube.com/user/PaulPsychicOctopus The YouTube Account] | * [http://www.youtube.com/user/PaulPsychicOctopus The YouTube Account] | ||
* [http://www.aquarium-ob.de/ Paul's home] | * [http://www.aquarium-ob.de/ Paul's home] | ||
* [https://twitter.com/PPsychicOctopus Paul's twitter] | * [https://twitter.com/PPsychicOctopus Paul's twitter] |
Revision as of 13:00, 2 July 2018
On 26th October 2010 Paul left his mortal body, fused with the universe and is now ready to become our beloved, mind controlling overlord! |
╲╲╲╲╲╭━━━━╮╱╱╱╱╱ ╲╲╲╲╲┃┊ ◒◒ ┊┃╱╱╱╱╱ ╭━━━━╯┊╰╯┊╰━━━━╮ ┃╭╮╭╮╭╮╭╮╭╮╭╮╭╮┃ ┃┃┃┃┃┃┃┃┃┃┃┃┃┃┃┃ ╰╯╰╯╰╯╰╯╰╯╰╯╰╯╰╯ ⓅⒶⓊⓁ☝ⓉⒽⒺ☝ⓄⒸⓉⓄⓅⓊⓈ
—Paul |
Paul was an English psychic octopus beloved by 4chan's /sp/artans, who lived at the Sea Life Aquarium in Oberhausen of Germany, that had been employed to pick the winners during the 2010 World Cup. His selections during the round-robin, group play and quarter-finals have been right on-the-money 100% of the time making him moar successful than every single sportscaster and self-proclaimed "expert" thus far. He was also 80% at the Euro 2008.
Before Germany's games, Paul was offered identical foodz in two identical perspex boxes decked out with the national flag of Germany and their opponent. It is a known fact that Paul made Vegas bookies shit bricks.
Paul made all of Germany furious when he predicted that Spain would beat them, but redeemed himself somewhat by picking the Germans to win the 3rd Place game against Team Uruguay. Again, Paul was correct. He then went above and beyond the call of duty by picking Spain to beat Dutchland in the final, his first attempt at picking a match winner that didn't involve Germany.
A close match went into extra-time after being tied 0:0 at the end of regulation and given that the Dutch seemed hellbent on proving Paul wrong by attempting to cripple every Spanish player to win, people began to have their doubts. Never bet against Paul though. With a perfect record on the line, Paul psychically took over Spain's Andrés Iniesta's brain and gave him the power to score the game winner as the clock ran out. Paul finished the World Cup 8 for 8 (a win for each tentacle), the chances of which is 1/256
Given Paul's amazing record, one wonders how Paul's 1337 octopus powers would fare in matters of global importance such as cut vs. uncut debates and USA vs. EU flamewars on 4chan.
Paul was found dead on 26th of October 2010. The management of the Sea Life Aquarium insits that it was a natural death - Paul was nearly 3 years old and with that a geriatric octopus. However, we assume that an assassination is being hushed over. Either way, the world lost a great mind and a true hero. Paul was definitely the biggest star and best thing about the 2010 World Cup and will be missed by everyone...except for the butthurt Hollish.
—Paul's keeper |
Vidya
Previous Video | Next Video
A Challenger Appears
Mani the Psychic Parakeet from Singapore has other ideas though, picking the Hollish (aka the Netherish) of Dutchland to pwn the Spaniards. Pretty ballsy for a fucking bird from a country that doesn't have a world-class football squad. Since Paul > Mani, you can disregard him cos he sucks cocks.
—Some lame-ass Paul hater. |
ALWAYS RIGHT, ALL THE TIME
—[1] |
Gallery of Paul
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Fuck Yeah, Paul!
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The tree of life. Fixed.
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Just Do It Faggot
See Also
External Links
- The YouTube Account
- Paul's home
- Paul's twitter
- Paul's Failbook
- Paul love/hate site
- Ask Paul a question.
- Paul for FIFA prez.
- Paul on TOW.
- Paul the Octopus finishes historic World Cup run (STUNNING PICTURES).
- Psychic octopus predicts Germany victory over England.
- Psychic Octopus Predicts German World Cup Victory Against Argentina
- /sp/ trolls the world w/Paul shoop
- ...but it doesn't matter cos Paul has spoken. It's Spain ftw.
- Germany v. Spain: Psychic octopus Paul unfazed by death threats, says keeper.
- The cephalopod has received death threats for his World Cup predictions, but he's just telling it like it is.
- World Cup 2010: Ten things you didn't know about Paul the psychic octopus.
- German Idiot bets $631,000 on Germany to go against Paul the octpus' prediction.
- diggin dat Paul
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Featured article July 12, 2010 | ||
Preceded by Sex In Christ |
Paul the Psychic Octopus | Succeeded by eFukt |