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No one likes you: Difference between revisions

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<center><youtube>Qm1osmEK3f8</youtube></center>
{{frame|<youtube>Qm1osmEK3f8</youtube>|margin=auto}}
 
<br>
You know that guy who always shows up uninvited to parties? The guy who spouts off jokes he heard on network sitcoms? The guy who thinks every woman is crazy over him? That's [[you]], and guess what? '''No one likes you.''' [[No one]] has ''ever'' liked you.
You know that guy who always shows up uninvited to parties? The guy who spouts off jokes he heard on network sitcoms? The guy who thinks every woman is crazy over him? That's [[you]], and guess what? '''No one likes you.''' [[No one]] has ''ever'' liked you.


All those friends you had? [[YTMND|They made fun of you behind your back]]. And in addition to no one liking you, [[Shit nobody cares about|no one cares about you]] either. [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bam_Bam_Bigelow#Death You could die and people wouldn't even be moved enough] to [[lulz|laugh]], but that doesn't mean they won't pull out [[mspaint|MSPAINT]] and [[IMMA CHARGIN MAH LAZER|shoop da whoop]] for your e-funeral.
All those friends you had? [[YTMND|They made fun of you behind your back]]. And in addition to no one liking you, [[Shit nobody cares about|no one cares about you]] either. '''{{wikilink|Bam_Bam_Bigelow#Death|You could die and people wouldn't even be moved enough}}''' to [[lulz|laugh]], but that doesn't mean they won't pull out [[mspaint|MSPAINT]] and [[IMMA CHARGIN MAH LAZER|shoop da whoop]] for your e-funeral.


==Identification==
==Identification==
{{warning|Most of these traits may describe you perfectly. In that case, SCREW YOU!}}
{{warning|Most of these traits may describe you perfectly. In that case, SCREW YOU!}}
You say: "Whatever, [[Wigger|dawg]], I gotz me hella [[Nigger|homies]]!" Well, do you? Here's a simple checklist to tell if, in fact, no one likes you.
<br>
*You are [[Al Gore]]
Here's a simple checklist to tell if, in fact, no one likes you:
*You are [[Chris Chan]]
*You are [[autistic]]
*You are on [[Special:Whatlinkshere/Template:Unwelcome|this list]]
*All your "top friends" on [[MySpace]] are people you've never met
*People tell you that you need deodorant
*[[Women]] never give you their phone number
*You give every woman ''your'' phone number
*You spend Friday nights playing [[World of Warcraft]] and [[Second Life]]
*You pose as a woman and cyber with men
*The only time you ever receive text messages is when your wireless carrier sends you an ad
*You spend Saturday nights on [[B|/b/]]
*You refer to all your friends by their screennames
*You edit [[Wikipedia]]
*Your most spoken phrase is: "[[Troll's remorse|C'mon, I was only kidding!]]"
*[[LOL|Virginity intact]]
*You don't leik mudkipz
*[[Rape|GHB]] works better than roses
*You leave comments on [[Tom Anderson|Tom]]'s profile
*All your "[[Poser|homies]]" stood by while you got your ass kicked at that party
*Your Dad fucked [[Your mom|your girlfriend]]
*You are [[sXe]]
*You call people first
*The only people that call you first are your relatives.
*[[Furfag|You wear fur animal suits]]
*You are [[trying too hard]]
*People constantly tell you that [[No one likes you|No One Likes You]]
*You are [[White people|White]], [[Nigger|Black]], [[AZN|Asian]], [[Spic|Mexican]], or [[Arab|Other]]
*You beg for +o (in channel or by sleeping with other ops, like [[Sparto]])
*You've never read a [[Friends only]] post on LiveJournal
*Small children cry when you talk to them
*You listen to [[Insane Clown Posse|ICP]]
*You listen to The [[Jonas Brothers]]
*Two words: [[Shit|Skid Marks]]
*You are b& from [[ED]]
*You are an [[Special:Listadmins|admin]] on [[ED]]
*You honk at people at the drive-thru window
*Your [[MySpace]] profile has [[over 9000]] animated sparkly [[GIF]]s
*You try to spout [[old meme]]s [[IRL]], and are [[Butthurt|surprised]] at [[Shit nobody cares about|the reaction]]
*[[Tori Sue Heck]] has drawn you as a small mammal
*You try to talk to women, but they'll always think you're a creep
*You read this whole list
*You click on the adult dating advertisements on the side of this page 
*You join [http://bubblegumdancer.proboards.com this site]
*You are an [[admin]] of [http://bubblegumdancer.proboards.com this site]
*You are [[Rootbrian|this guy]]:
 
<youtube>auOnyTpk-EA</youtube>


#You say: "Whatever, [[Wigger|dawg]], I gotz me hella [[Nigger|homies]]!" Well, do you?
#You are [[Al Gore]]
#You are [[Chris Chan]]
#You are [[autistic]]
#You are on [[Special:Whatlinkshere/Template:Unwelcome|this list]]
#All your "top friends" on [[MySpace]] are people you've never met
#People tell you that you need deodorant
#[[Women]] never give you their phone number
#You give every woman ''your'' phone number
#You spend Friday nights playing [[World of Warcraft]] and [[Second Life]]
#[[Tony Sidaway|You pose as a woman and cyber with men]]
#The only time you ever receive text messages is when your wireless carrier sends you an ad
#You spend Saturday nights on [[B|/b/]]
#You refer to all your friends by their screennames
#You edit [[Wikipedia]]
#Your most spoken phrase is: "[[Troll's remorse|C'mon, I was only kidding!]]"
#[[LOL|Virginity intact]]
#You don't leik mudkipz
#[[Rape|GHB]] works better than roses
#You leave comments on [[Tom Anderson|Tom]]'s profile
#All your "[[Poser|homies]]" stood by while you got your ass kicked at that party
#Your Dad fucked [[Your mom|your girlfriend]]
#You are [[sXe]]
#You call people first
#The only people that call you first are your relatives.
#[[Furfag|You wear fur animal suits]]
#You are [[trying too hard]]
#People constantly tell you that [[No one likes you|No One Likes You]]
#You are [[White people|White]], [[Nigger|Black]], [[AZN|Asian]], [[Spic|Mexican]], or [[Arab|Other]]
#You beg for +o (in channel or by sleeping with other ops, like [[Sparto]])
#You've never read a [[Friends only]] post on LiveJournal
#Small children cry when you talk to them
#You listen to [[Insane Clown Posse|ICP]]
#You listen to The [[Jonas Brothers]]
#Two words: [[Shit|Skid Marks]]
#You are b& from [[ED]]
#You are an [[Special:Listadmins|admin]] on [[ED]]
#You honk at people at the drive-thru window
#Your [[MySpace]] profile has [[over 9000]] animated sparkly [[GIF]]s
#You try to spout [[old meme]]s [[IRL]], and are [[Butthurt|surprised]] at [[Shit nobody cares about|the reaction]]
#[[Tori Sue Heck]] has drawn you as a small mammal
#You try to talk to women, but they'll always think you're a creep
#You read this whole list
#You click on the adult dating advertisements on the side of this page 
#You join '''{{archive|fHBGO|this site}}'''
#You are an [[admin]] of '''{{archive|fHBGO|this site}}'''
#You are [[Rootbrian|this guy]]:
{{frame|<youtube>auOnyTpk-EA</youtube>}}
<br>
==On [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] ==
==On [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] ==
On ED, it is very easy to tell if no one likes [[you]]:
On ED, it is very easy to tell if no one likes [[you]]:
* Your user page is vandalized with [[Goatse]] or other [[shock images]]
 
* All your edits are reverted
#Your user page is vandalized with [[Goatse]] or other [[shock images]]
* You are [[gline]]d from [[ED IRC]]
#All your edits are reverted
* This has been put on your Talk Page:
#You are [[gline]]d from [[ED IRC]]
{{clear}}
#[[Template:Unwelcome|This]] has been put on your Talk Page:
{{unwelcome}}
{{unwelcome}}
<br>
<div align="right">i.e. <nowiki>{{unwelcome}}</nowiki>.</div>
<div align="right">i.e. <nowiki>{{unwelcome}}</nowiki>.</div>
 
<br>
==What to Do==
==What to Do==
Well, it's easy to say [[Mitchell Henderson|Go Kill Yourself And Then You Will Be Such An Hero]], but to tell you the truth, if No One Likes You now, then everyone will be glad you died. If you care about the rest of the world and weren't so goddam selfish, then you would do yourself in. Because it would make us all very happy.
Well, it's easy to say [[Mitchell Henderson|Go Kill Yourself And Then You Will Be Such An Hero]], but to tell you the truth, if No One Likes You now, then everyone will be glad you died. If you care about the rest of the world and weren't so goddam selfish, then you would do yourself in. Because it would make us all very happy.
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If [[suicide]] is too [[hardcore|cliché]] for you, then there's several choices available to mitigate your shittiness:
If [[suicide]] is too [[hardcore|cliché]] for you, then there's several choices available to mitigate your shittiness:


*Start a [[Livejournal]]
#Start a [[Livejournal]]
*If you already have a Livejournal, then [[Deleting your LiveJournal|delete it]]
#If you already have a Livejournal, then [[Deleting your LiveJournal|delete it]]
*[[Emo|Gauge your ears]]
#[[Emo|Gauge your ears]]
*Dress like an iPod commercial
#Dress like an iPod commercial
*Write shitty [[emo]] [[crap|poetry]]
#Write shitty [[emo]] [[crap|poetry]]
*Join [[Alcohol|A.]] [[Anonymous|A.]]
#Join [[Alcohol|A.]] [[Anonymous|A.]]
*Rent Buffy on DVD and become an [[lesbian|wiccan]]
#Rent Buffy on DVD and become an [[lesbian|wiccan]]
*Start a [[Columbine|school shooting]] or go on a killing spree and aim for the high score
#Start a [[Columbine|school shooting]] or go on a killing spree and aim for the high score
 
#[[Vandalism|Edit]] [[ED]]
*[[Vandalism|Edit]] [[ED]]
#[[Troll]]
*[[Troll]]
#[[Fap|???]]
*[[Fap|???]]
#[[Raptor Jesus|Profit]]!
*[[Raptor Jesus|Profit]]!


==Gallery==
==Gallery==
<center><gallery perrow="5">
<br>
{{cg|Nobody Likes You...|cg1|center|
<gallery perrow="5">
File:Your-hobby-is-stupid-kill-yourself.jpg
File:Your-hobby-is-stupid-kill-yourself.jpg
Image:Childhood trauma soap.jpg
Image:Childhood trauma soap.jpg
Line 93: Line 97:
Image:Rosie Odonnell.jpg|No one likes this guy
Image:Rosie Odonnell.jpg|No one likes this guy
Image:BOUT MY DICK.jpg|He has no niggaz ridin' fo him
Image:BOUT MY DICK.jpg|He has no niggaz ridin' fo him
</gallery>
|
<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Outcasts.jpg|Even if no one likes you, you can still be a [[Internet killers|Celebrity]]
Image:Outcasts.jpg|Even if no one likes you, you can still be a [[Internet killers|Celebrity]]
Image:Michaelmoore.jpg|Making [[lies|documentaries]] endears you to no one
Image:Michaelmoore.jpg|Making [[lies|documentaries]] endears you to no one
Line 102: Line 109:
Image:BenderBCClub.jpg|You could disappear tomorrow and it wouldn't make any difference
Image:BenderBCClub.jpg|You could disappear tomorrow and it wouldn't make any difference
Image:Noonelikesyou.jpg
Image:Noonelikesyou.jpg
</gallery></center>
</gallery>}}
 
<br>
==See Also==
==See Also==
*[[Kill Yourself]] right now, faggot.
*[[Nobody Cares]]
*[[Nobody Cares]]
*[[You have no friends]]
*[[You have no friends]]
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*[[beefrave]]
*[[beefrave]]
*[[Attention whore]]
*[[Attention whore]]
*[[Heather Lind]]
*[[Uncyclopedia]]
*[[Uncyclopedia]]
*[[Insane Clown Posse]]
*[[Insane Clown Posse]]
Line 127: Line 136:


[[Category:Epithets]]
[[Category:Epithets]]
[[Category:You]]

Latest revision as of 01:12, 2 September 2023


You know that guy who always shows up uninvited to parties? The guy who spouts off jokes he heard on network sitcoms? The guy who thinks every woman is crazy over him? That's you, and guess what? No one likes you. No one has ever liked you.

All those friends you had? They made fun of you behind your back. And in addition to no one liking you, no one cares about you either. You could die and people wouldn't even be moved enough to laugh, but that doesn't mean they won't pull out MSPAINT and shoop da whoop for your e-funeral.

Identification

Warning!
Most of these traits may describe you perfectly. In that case, SCREW YOU!


Here's a simple checklist to tell if, in fact, no one likes you:

  1. You say: "Whatever, dawg, I gotz me hella homies!" Well, do you?
  2. You are Al Gore
  3. You are Chris Chan
  4. You are autistic
  5. You are on this list
  6. All your "top friends" on MySpace are people you've never met
  7. People tell you that you need deodorant
  8. Women never give you their phone number
  9. You give every woman your phone number
  10. You spend Friday nights playing World of Warcraft and Second Life
  11. You pose as a woman and cyber with men
  12. The only time you ever receive text messages is when your wireless carrier sends you an ad
  13. You spend Saturday nights on /b/
  14. You refer to all your friends by their screennames
  15. You edit Wikipedia
  16. Your most spoken phrase is: "C'mon, I was only kidding!"
  17. Virginity intact
  18. You don't leik mudkipz
  19. GHB works better than roses
  20. You leave comments on Tom's profile
  21. All your "homies" stood by while you got your ass kicked at that party
  22. Your Dad fucked your girlfriend
  23. You are sXe
  24. You call people first
  25. The only people that call you first are your relatives.
  26. You wear fur animal suits
  27. You are trying too hard
  28. People constantly tell you that No One Likes You
  29. You are White, Black, Asian, Mexican, or Other
  30. You beg for +o (in channel or by sleeping with other ops, like Sparto)
  31. You've never read a Friends only post on LiveJournal
  32. Small children cry when you talk to them
  33. You listen to ICP
  34. You listen to The Jonas Brothers
  35. Two words: Skid Marks
  36. You are b& from ED
  37. You are an admin on ED
  38. You honk at people at the drive-thru window
  39. Your MySpace profile has over 9000 animated sparkly GIFs
  40. You try to spout old memes IRL, and are surprised at the reaction
  41. Tori Sue Heck has drawn you as a small mammal
  42. You try to talk to women, but they'll always think you're a creep
  43. You read this whole list
  44. You click on the adult dating advertisements on the side of this page
  45. You join this site
  46. You are an admin of this site
  47. You are this guy:


On Encyclopedia Dramatica

On ED, it is very easy to tell if no one likes you:

  1. Your user page is vandalized with Goatse or other shock images
  2. All your edits are reverted
  3. You are glined from ED IRC
  4. This has been put on your Talk Page:
GO AWAY!
NOBODY
LIKES YOU!
plz die



i.e. {{unwelcome}}.


What to Do

Well, it's easy to say Go Kill Yourself And Then You Will Be Such An Hero, but to tell you the truth, if No One Likes You now, then everyone will be glad you died. If you care about the rest of the world and weren't so goddam selfish, then you would do yourself in. Because it would make us all very happy.

If suicide is too cliché for you, then there's several choices available to mitigate your shittiness:

  1. Start a Livejournal
  2. If you already have a Livejournal, then delete it
  3. Gauge your ears
  4. Dress like an iPod commercial
  5. Write shitty emo poetry
  6. Join A. A.
  7. Rent Buffy on DVD and become an wiccan
  8. Start a school shooting or go on a killing spree and aim for the high score
  9. Edit ED
  10. Troll
  11. ???
  12. Profit!

Gallery


Nobody Likes You... About missing Pics
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]


See Also