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The Rolling : MTV Gets Rickroll'd

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I am honored that my fans worked so hard to help me win Best Act Ever at the 2008 MTV Europe Music Awards
 

 
 

Rick Astley

Rick Astley...a winner is you!
God's intention for humanity.
I did my part, anonymous. May I have my dog back now, please?
Ya rly!
ANONYMOUS EXPOSED!: Rick Astley's mum!
Rick gets so many votes that MTV is forced to divide by zero.

In late September 2008, Rick Astley's Mum lobbied hard to get Rick Astley on the ballot as a write-in candidate for MTV Europe's 2008 Awards in the Best Act Ever category, along with a Clash tribute band, a couple of whores, and some pretend rock emo faggots. Rick won the write-in with 98% of the vote. And God saw that it was good.

On October 2nd, 2008, it was announced that Rick Astley had indeed been omnomnominated for the award.

This after a Zerg rush of fan votes propelled him from not even on the radar to off the fucking map. MTV opened voting here and The Rick Astley Appreciation Society went to work lobbying /b/ to vote vote! vote!! VOTE!!!oneoneone DO IT FAGGOT! The voting to be ended on Nov 2nd with a conservative estimate of over one billion votes for Rick, moar than enough (95% of all votes in all categories) for him to be crowned BEST ACT EVER on the Nov 6th show.

When ridiculed by all the butthurt 'music purist' BAWfags (who'd nominated the likes of Bill Kaulitz for BEST EVAR ACT) on MTV Europe's forum, claiming MTV was doing it for the lulz, the show's producer said:

   
 
Rick's fans have obviously decided that he deserves recognition as a pop icon and no doubt they are determined to make sure he wins on the night.
 

 
 

—Richard Godfrey

Rick, when reached for comment, was like LOL WUT?


 
 
What do you think when you hear "Rick Astley" and "BEST EVER ACT"?
 

 

—BBC



 
 
It seems a bit weird to me. I think it's a wind up.
 

 

Rick Astley


Other were similarly baffled.

   
 
The Internet should be switched off. Now. Permanently.
 

 
 

itexaminer.com

"The straw that finally broke the camel's back was the announcement today that Rick Astley is the front runner in an MTV online poll to vote for the best live musical act of all time.

That deserves repetition: Rick Astley, the best musical act of all time. Not Beethoven, Wagner, the Beatles, Frank Zappa or even the Kitten Mincers, but Rick Astley.

He's not there because fat cats in record companies have bribed people to vote for him; he's not even there because MTV is the spawn of Satan; he's there because you, yes you - the Web users - have voted for him."

Others were moar charitable:

   
 
Viewers are used to MTV standbys like U2 and Britney, but a chance for Astley to RickRoll the world on live television would be a special treat indeed.
 

 
 

LA Times

"There could be nothing more "lulzy" than a net wide campaign to steal the all-time musical crown for Astley, a guy who unhesitatingly called the song that twice made him famous "naff.""

MTV later posted a poll on their EU website, asking if Rick was deserving of the nomination. It wasn't even close.

2:36pm Oct 3rd

Yes - The people have spoken and Rickrolling rules! 100% (11,726,515 votes)

No - He doesn't deserve to be in the same category as those great artists! 0% (2,477 votes)

In October 2008 War Was Beginning

   
 
First we had SETI@home then we had F@H now we have this. I honestly don't know which is a better use of our computers..."
 

 
 

Stephen Hawking

Emo fags be hatin'
This is bigger than me and you my friends.
A screenshot taken at least 100 years ago by a BAE commissioned Internet rover, which has finally made it back to us through satellite communications. This poll details the kinds of cancer inducing fanfics V4R was exposed to while trying to spread the lulz.
Bill admits defeat.
MTV asking for it.
Making sure MTV GETs Rickrolled.
DO IT DAVID.
This man accepted Rick Astley's award for him
digg Rickroll'd.
digg gets limerickroll'd

After accidentally learning to Internets, Tokio Hotel's faggot fanbois decided to rig the vote for Bill by using scripts and the iMacro addon for Firefox to automate voting. Because MTV encouraged fans to vote as much as they want, this technically isn't cheating.

   
 
so i can make my mouse repeatedly vote for them...1,000 times without even touching it >:D
 

 
 

—THfag after taking CSIII

However, they had no idea what they were fucking with by trying to hack on steroids. The Internet Love Machine immediately jumped into action and sent out a clarion call for all Anons near and far to counter attack.

An heroic Anon named Vote4Rick from the Land Down Under, came forth from the dugout and stepped up to the plate, setting up an EPIC fan site for all of Anonkind from ebaums, to YTMNDers, to /b/tards, goons, EDiots, UGfags and even the moral fags of Enturb. V4R did not do this alone; many contributions were made by anon, Rick Astley's Mum, and cliche.

Bestactever.com became Anon's HQ for the War on Faggotry and boasted an armory beyond Tokio Hotel fanboi's wildest dreams, with tools which could be operated by skiddies and 1337 haxors of all levels. It was soon discovered by the LA Times resident basement dweller -'Web Scout' David Sarno- who voted over 900 times by accident before writing an article on it. From there it hit teh digg and made rounds at ebaums.

Anon vs. Emofags

While anon was busy running the epic "WebRickVoter", the Delta Force of ebaums began plotting unilateral rAIDS on all known Tokio Hotel fan sites, forums, and chat rooms. With little tech savvy, the Billfags were helpless and a single strike from an /i/nsurgent launched Predator drone wiped them off the face of the Internets.

   
 
Everything is OK. This is only routine maintenance. We will be back very soon!
 

 
 

—Typical banner message on a TH site, after being pwned

As always, the actions of the ebaums squads were pinned on innocent anons, and Billfags attempted to "retaliate" against bestactever.com. V4R was accused of being the "spammer" behind all of the attacks on their precious sites.

After purchasing some used balls from Ru Paul and reading Hacking For Dummies by Michael Sandy, the emofags launched a pretty lame counter-attack on bestactever.com and the official Rick Astley fan site, despite V4R's denials and apologies.

However, just as they do in life, they failed it. They achieved nothing (the web host was performing server maintenance) and conveniently left a shitload of IP addresses which were easily tracked back to servers hosting Tokio Hotel content.

V4R contemplated posting said IPs for the lulz, but a cooler head prevailed. As an olive branch, he even commissioned bestactever's script gurus to formulate a script for the Billfag skiddies to use in a different category that Tokio Hotel was fagging up. A program was designed to cast a vote for Rick in the Best Act Ever category per every nine TH votes in the Headliner category. The fact that THfags would have been openly using voting programs was supposed to help anon in case MTV deemed auto-voting illegal, which never happened.

   
 
It is against the rules. It's a hack. Anything that involves you not using your own fingers to place those votes? Is against the rules, unfair, and WILL get Tokio Hotel disqualified if it catches on.
 

 
 

—Melanie, site admin of Tokio Hotel International and Armchair E-lawyer

This failed horribly, as the THfags were too honest to cheat the election by using hacker programs instead of manually clicking in votes over 9000 times a day. They started to claim that they had never used any methods of automated voting, and that only Rick Astley was receiving "illegitimate" votes. V4R responded by calling them out and buying up advertisement space on a TH fanfic site so that he could place seizure inducing "VOTE FOR RICK" ads right next to their TH twincest fantasies. Sadly, V4R caught both AIDs and cancer while descending into these depths of Internet hell, and passed away last Thursday.

Escalation of Hostilities: IRC Faggotry

In mid-October, V4R naively decided that an IRC channel was in order and set up #bestactever on Partyvan IRC for the growing ranks of bestactever.com Ricktards to congregate, brainstorm, co-ordinate and -eventually- cause massive amounts of dumbass drama with THfags.

It is an unwritten Rule of the Internet, that everything that IRC touches, turns to mold so it was bound to happen sooner or later but in this case it was sooner. It was also supersized. And, as always, the faggotry was exposed almost as it happened, scrapped and pastebin'd for everyone to see.

After a faggot New Kids On The Block fanboi named David (whose alleged g/f is a Billfag) got his ops taken away he PM'd another David with his plans to defect to Tokio Hotel's camp, help them win and take down #bestactever.

After this and various other cancerous Partyvan modfag drama, #bestactever moved to the friendlier confines of Britfag IRC of choice, AnonNet.

Rickrolling The Planet

A week before the show, MTV leaked intel that Rick will perform not one, but two songs live at the awards.

This after Rick Astley's Mum started a petition and encouraged Anon to write in to MTV to demand a live performance by Rick.

However, after some sneaky, 11th hour, backroom music biz dealings possibly involving Tokio Hotel's record label Universal, Rick's invitation to the awards was withdrawn. Sources close to the pop legend later revealed that MTV's brain trust had approached Rick's management and offered to present Rick with his award at a press conference the day before the awards show on the 6th.

Then they wanted him to 'hang out' with his award in the wings at the 'artists' bar' and have all the 'real artists' come by and sign the award which they would then auction for charity. He already intended to do this but MTV were actually dictating to him; there were no other options.

This in exchange for bowing out of the live show where -they feared- he would show-up not only the losers in his own category but pwn all the other alleged 'talent' and claim the entire show on behalf of himself and Anonymous.

Rick told them to fuck off.

   
 
Fuck off!
 

 
 

—Rick Astley

MTV were then forced to laud our hero, without our hero. Perez Hilton picked up Rick's award (not that he was asked to) in his stead and best be giving it to Rick before Rick's Mum has to feed him to the chans.

Rick Astley Wins!-The Moment of Victory... more like ricktory, amirite?

A small step for Rick Astley, a giant step for the lulz.

The FAIL that is the EMAs

Proof that MTV is a bunch of furfags.

MTV, determined to please their target audience, put together a stunning display of faggotry and AIDS. Some argue, that apart from the chronically unfunny host, bland performers and the fact that all the awards were given to the wrong people, it was actually a pretty cool show. The Rick Astley fan base foresaw this faggotry and decided to offer MTV a lifeline in the form of an epic campaign to get Rick the Best Act Ever award; a campaign that resulted in over 900,000,000 votes for Astley. This is at least 100 times the total amount of all votes cast in the 2007 EMAs.

As expected, MTV managed to fail it by disregarding Rick's epic vote count; the fact that he got 80% of all the votes in all the categories was never mentioned. In addition the nominees for Best Act Ever were not introduced on screen like the nominees for other categories, and, since Rick didn't attend the ceremony in order to avoid getting AIDS, the award was accepted on his behalf by some faggot.

Before the ceremony there were rumors of Rick's appearance and even a performance. This could not be arranged, however, due to MTV's strict zero-tolerance policy regarding talent. Nevertheless MTV proceeded to attention whore the fuck out of Rick's nomination before the awards.

Rick's Shafting

Vidyas

#bestactever's resident eyeveechan.
Mudkips liek Rick.
Kitteh 4 Rick
Slowpoke 4 Rick
Spartacus 4 Rick

Rick The Vote

It's A Done Deal

A Vote For Rick Is A Vote For Good Clean Fun

A touching, ballad-y acoustic cover of the good Sir Astley's song

Gallery of De/b/ate The Nominees

Has Rickrolling gone too far?
"A bit of a shock really, a bit weird I think, a bit off the scale."

Fucking With Emos

With the awards out of the way, ebaums' 1337 paramilitary wing started looking at Tokio Hotel fanbois, Perez Hilton and MTV funny. Initially Anon's beef was with the Billfags who were BAWWWing to anyone who'd listen that Rick Astley's Mum was cheating (this despite the fact that they were also 'cheating', albeit less successfully). They'd also attempted to DDoS bestactever.com and Rick Astley's own site. Howevar, after MTV's epic dis of Rick and Perez Hilton stealing his award, the Internet Hate Machine was fired up and readied for war. Stay tuned for moar here: http://irc.partyvan.fm #astleysarmy

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See Also

External Links

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