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I Can Has Cheezburger?
"I Can Has Cheezburger?" is the banal, ripped-off name for a site where the borderline-retarded masses of the world first learned of what 4chan has long known as Caturday. It was started in January 2007 by Eric Nakagawa, a rather inarticulate AZN in Hawaii, with a picture he "found on the internet." It is composed of a group of furries and shut-ins (typical memefags of 4chan) sitting in their basements uploading pictures of cats to which they masturbate, adding captions using the grammar of an ape on crack to sound cute when in reality it just makes them sound like what they truly are; fucking perverts. In an effort to simplify and make more accessible and mainstream the concept of Caturday, which he himself could not grasp, Nakagawa coined the term "lolcat"
The death of Caturday as we know it?
In June 2007, "I Can Has Cheezburger" (ICHC) became a partner with Photobucket, which is owned by Fox Jews (who in turn got owned by Anonymous, but that's another story). The widely used Photobucket posted a link to a the "ICHC Factory," where users could upload and create their own "Lolcats" and submit them for the rest of the dullards from Web 2.0 to create their weak version of joy and at the same time taking every long running Caturday pic they could find and slapping their fucking ICHC watermark on it to be an eyesore for the ages. Many long-time 4-channers yielded to the Photobucket juggernaut and claimed that Caturday was now dead. This assessment was premature. While it is true that your grandmother and your 9-year-old nephew and your developmentally-delayed cousin Shirley are now gurgling at "Lolcats" they receive from each other in the e-mail, they learn nothing from these cheapened, dumbed-down image macros, and could not even begin to grasp the real power in Caturday's casual elegance.
tl;dr Lolcats make you gay.
Not for amateurs
Later in 2007, ICHC and Nakagawa were profiled by Business Week, one of the most tl;dr magazines in America. In the article it was revealed that Nakagawa is currently making close to $6,000 USD in ad sales from the site each month, with over 500,000 page views daily. This is yet another confirmation that the Internets are serious business. Many people find it funny that someone who enjoys "Caturday" gets in an uproar over this site. This could be compared to a Star Trek Fan getting upset over something involving Star Wars.
Lulz was corrupted
Predictably, other low-imagination opportunists joined the looting of beautiful memes, corrupting the lulz therein and turning it into "lol." The name "Caturday" itself was stolen for another "copycat" site called "Katurday." Then someone targeted many of the other *chan memes, such as "A cat is fine too," distorting them completely so that they would only appeal to retards in the real world as opposed to online. Strangely it escapes the grasp of most people crying over this phenominon that the chans stole the memes from SomethingAwful(grinman) and YTMND(nedm) in the first place.
This phenomenon of "mainstreaming" what once was rare and amazing is nothing new. For example, the "mainstreaming" of the Internet itself. This allows many infantile fucktards, such as those found communities like 4chan, to find a voice and make themselves feel important and noteworthy in such important matters as LOLCats. Which is of course far from true, when really they probably shouldnt even be breathing.
If it is any consolation, these abusers will never truly understand that which they mock and defile with their weak, shallow imagery and infantile blurbs. Also, they are asking for it. Seriously.
Habbo steals LOLCATS
The flying monkey circus of Habbo Hotel are at it again. To try to "fit in" they have started using this to draw moar and moar children to keep their massive underground pedo gig going. There was a link to the article... but the article was deleted.
One Step Too Far & The Final Solution
On Friday the 25th of April, a thread appeared on Ebaumsworld. It included a link to an interview on wired.com with the canihascheezburger fgts. In what can only be described as an act of catastrophic stupidity, they dropped dox on themselves, and claimed responsibility for the creation of Caturday memes!
See the interview here: http://blog.wired.com/underwire/2008/04/behind-the-me-3.html
Agents of ebaumsworld were enraged. "ROFLcon? WTF is ROFLcon? RAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!" they decried. The rusty internet hate machine was revved up again, and in a few hours full dox had been compiled, and harassment began.
Within seconds, a crack team of engineers were working on a final solution for the Caturday thieves. Weapons were deployed to all foot soldiers willing to fight for the dignity of Ebaumsworld. But as always, nothing happend because 4chan is little more than a paper lolcat.
LulzFTW is a corruption of lulz
To further capitalize on the originality and success of LOLCats and placate the anonymous masses, the creators of LOLCats launched lulzftw.com to promote their new book of image macros. Failbook group SFags have an opportunity to meet the creators of LOLCats in their city on September 21. Failbook group Location
Anti-lulz
Trying too hard coupled with unfunny anti-lulz killed Caturday. Behold, the deepest depths of failure on the internets:
Time isn't laughing, either
Time magazine, following the insufferable internet trend of divvying up meaningless factoids and opinions into their very own Top Ten list, lists Lolcats as the #4 most overrated blog on the internet.
Proper methods of trolling ICHC
- Post "FIRST!" on every submission. While Unfunny, it will generate a lot of butthurt from "the regulars"
- Sign up for a new account and kindly reject the welcoming committee that forms when they realize you're new to ICHC.
- Link to Zippocat.
Women and ICHC
As the ICHC plague grew and grew, even women, mainly 40 year old moms, began learning to use the power of the internet to browse ICHC for lolcats, leaving the kitchen for hours on end, forcing many men to confront them. And as if thats not bad enough, many of these woman lurk ICHC like theres no tommorow, turning what used to be mildly funny captions, into stupid, cute captions that only the inferior and over-emotional female mind could conceive.
However this milfy-addiction to ICHC leaves a great oppurtunity to produce many good laughs when properly trolled. See "Proper methods of trolling ICHC".
Galleries
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Sux
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Fale
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Nothing is sacred
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Lolfat
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To all hoomans who sell cat costumes
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Azn version
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Who says lolcats cant be intelligent?
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chocobo's on my lolcat?
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World's first LOLcat from 1905
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missuse of the lulz
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done by a fat black person woman
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Attempt to make a lolcat "edgy"
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even Google knows lolcats are made of fail and plagiarism
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Unlikely.
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lolcat tutorial
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missuse of lulz yet again.
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a rip off of YTMND
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The mystery is solved
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No, you can't
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Ha ha.
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At least one ordinary Web 2.0 person is not fooled
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Teh Profecy Wuz Troo!
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He pickz his nose
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A typical image on I can has cheezburger.
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No nigrz on Cheezburger
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Targeting other 4chan memes
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Vader Cat
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Wannabe
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it are fact. i know bcuase i edtied the wikipedia article about it
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Kitteh tells you the truth.
See Also
- Cats
- Caturday
- Internet linguistics
- LOLcat Translator Project
- Fail Blog
- Know Your Meme -
ICHC with 10 times the faggotryThey actually OWN this site now.
More Examples of Lolcat faggery daggery doo
- Trollcats.com
- Lolcats.com
- Loldjs.com
- Lolthulhu.com
- Katurday.com, "The ultimate lolcat source"
- Lolcats MySpace
- The Lolcats Collection
- LOLCat Bible Translation Project
- At first glance Caturday win, on second, LJ faggotry as usual.
- Wikipedia, in a shocking turn of events, now supports lolcats.
- The Complete History of Lolcat, part 1.
- Speak LOLcat
- The Online LOLcat Translator Project
- LOLcats 100 years ago
Further degradations
- Lolcunts
- Lolbots
- Loliticians
- Lolgays
- loltards
- lolrats
- Lolcode
- Lolthulu
- lolsecretz
- Loldjs
- lol bible
- funny cat videos
I can has Goatse?
- Make your own 'I can has cheezburger' here for Graet Justice! - Plz to be raping and flooding with pr0nz
I Can Has Cheezburger? is part of a series on Visit the Sites Portal for complete coverage. |