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Fallout Online

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File:Fallout76.png
Yes, this garbage is actually the official logo for the game...

Fallout Online, sometimes referred to as Fallout 76 and formerly known as Project V13, is a post-apocalyptic MMO (Minimally Multiplayer Online) "roleplaying" game and Bugthesda Shitworks' latest attempt to milk the formerly beloved Fallout franchise by shitting out a half-arsed attempt at an online Fallout game on the same buggy and outdated game engine that powered 2015's Fallout 4, 2011's Skyrim, 2008's Fallout 3, 2006's Oblivion, 2002's Morrowind and 1982's Custer's Revenge.

Following the release of the final DLC for Fallout 4, Bethesda's Fraud Howard and his team decided to give a huge middle finger to fans of The Elder Scrolls by immediately going back to making moar DLC for Fallout 4 – only this time they'd attempt to rake in even more Jewgold by releasing it as a "brand new" full-priced game.

Not content with just giving a fuck you to Elder Scrolls fags, Bethesda also decided to give a huge fuck you to Falloutfags by setting Fallout 76 a mere 20 years after the great war – thus making it the earliest game in the series timeline and setting things up for Bethesda to brutally rape the Fallout canon.

What's this? A bad Bethesda game?

File:Greatscore.png
Todd is going to rape a lot of employees over this

That's right. This steaming pile of shit that is a digital only game, as the physical copies lack a disk and only come with a code got a score of less than 2.5 on Metacritic and is one of the lowest rated games of 2018. How did they do it? Simple. Don't fix any glitches in the game and leave voice chat on all the time so that people who are near you can hear jerking off to that sexy player model you just made. They had also made the game look exactly like Fallout 4 despite saying they improved the engine to have better graphics quality Also, you can't forget that they retextured Skyrim's dragons and made one of them into a final boss. But wait, you say, this can't be true! Bethesda had the greatest E3 panel of 2018! Well sorry to break it to you, but Bethesda does not care about you or their shitty fanbase and only wants you to buy the shit they can make in about 20 mins. They also felt the need to include microtransactions, just to squeeze out as many shekels from their brain-dead playerbase as much as Jewishly possible. In the name of cutting costs wherever and however they could, Bethesda opted to reuse an old, shitty engine that was never built to be multiplayer-compatible in the first place, a problem that the team resolved simply by stealing netcode from the Quake engine and then calling it a day, not even bothering to implement any of the countless fan-made fixes for their own engine. While not addressing any of the issues players have been reporting since the game was first released, Bethesda keeps a steady stream of shitty and outright useless updates flowing through the pipelines that fix absolutely nothing, because why not? We all know of a similar company that does this, and these are the people Todd looks up to daily.

The Nylon/Canvas Bag Controversy

File:Shitbag.jpg
$200 well spent (chair not included)

Those Jews who were rich enough to purchase the Super Special Edition were guaranteed a Canvas Bag, a High Quality replica of a Brotherhood of Steel helmet, a map that glows in the fucking dark, and some more plastic crap. What they actually got was cheap ass Nylon bag, a low quality helmet with a shitty voice modifier that made you sound like a nigger and has a light that is dimmer than the inside of Kirk Johnson's anus, a map that actually does glow in the fucking dark, and of course, a fuck ton of plastic crap. The problem here is that Bethesda had false advertised the bag that came in the box, which can be considered a crime in the United States and are now forced to give the people who bought it an extra reward. And what reward did they get?

And what can you buy with 500 atoms exactly? Well according to the Bethesda store, 500 atoms is the in-game equivalent to $5, meaning that you can buy basically jack shit in their store. Fans were enraged by this generous offer that Bethesda had given them, and threatened lawsuits again. So they finally decided to stop giving bags to people they sponsored and actually start shipping them using the cheapest and longest shipping plans avalible in order to get the well paying customers their bags as fast as possible. So far they haven't got anymore lawsuit threats from the butthurt, but people still want their money back.

The Nuka Dark Rum Scam

as 2018 was comming to a close, Bethesda wanted to end the year with 1 last fuck you moment. how could they do that after the absolute failure of thier game, make a shity bottle of rum based of the game. it was $80 and an indication that Bugthesda was trying to scam the remaining falloutfags again.

  • What Did You Get?
A plastic shell.
A bottle of shit quality rum.
The realization that you got scamed.

in case you realized it, Bugthesda tried to pander to collecters after receiving bad press from thier last Collecters Editon scam.

The Original Fallout Online

The Fallout Online we got

See Also

Fallout Online is part of a series on

Gaming

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