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Brony

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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Bronies are the self titled obsessive watchers of the television show My Little Pony: Friendship is magic, usually adult men who channel their latent homosexuality by watching a show which has an audience bracket that consists of little girls. These basement dwelling sacks of neckbeard flesh latched their grubby hands onto everything pony as soon as they heard the whimsical theme-tune drift through their hairy ears. Bronies smothered themselves with all things related to the show, and spread their sick fetishism throughout the interbutts, declaring themselves the new collective of asperger ridden no-lifes on the block. Every single brony is a closeted furfag, they desperately cling onto the show and it's freakish fan base because they somehow believed that masturbating to cartoon ponies is in some way a step up from yiffing to cartoon animals. Bronies managed slide themselves into the realms of 4chan, tackling b's already potent faggotry with their own, and that's when things got ugly.

"As a person with Asperger syndrome, I learned more about theory of mind, friendships and social interactions from this season than I had in the previous 31 years of life."
What your average brony looks like when he spots some pony ass.
File:Bronie.jpg
Typical Brony.
How ponyfags spend their free time.
Ponyfags are just furfags in denial.
Oh god, please kill them.
Typical Brony Conversation on how Applejack's juices would taste like.
Bronies. They are proud of this.

Analysis of Bronies

File:Bronies lolwtf.jpg
Fact: Not one of these people have a job.

There are many problems with these embarrassments to God. And listing them all would take a thousand lifetimes, and some way of actually caring about the subject at hand, so here we will simply state the more teeth grinding ones.

  • Bronies spread their unfunny memes faster than AIDS spreads at a Native African orgy, even taking other, dead memes and raping them to infinity and beyond. This mostly just involves them half-arsedly taking some caps from the show and then slapping some abhorrent, forgettable phrase or meme onto it without any thought to how hideous the whole collaboration appears to everyone else.
  • They feel the need to defend the show, saying it's a perfect example of everything a good animated series needs, like forgettable music scores, piss poor flash animation, and a script riddled with goofy moments BECAUSE IT'S MEANT FOR CHILDREN and references that supposedly make it complex but really just add filler to the (nonexistent) scripts.
  • Bronies are deluded people in the first place, and that reflects on their opinions of the show. Like the three main popular shows on Cartoon Network (Adventure Time, Gumball, and Regular Show) those shows got attention only because of their sexual appeal and general stupidity. My Little Pony is basically the popularity of Adventure Time and Gumball combined; it's popular because it's the easy-to-sexualize animals and the assumption that everyone is a neon lesbian put into one. It's a shit storm of bad animation, unfunny memes, and Encyclopædia Dramatica articles writing themselves. But for this reason just listed alone, it corrupts the (already pathetic) brain of a Ponyfag into believing that the show is well animated, well written, creative, has superb music and sound, and a gold mine of well deserved popularity. In reality, it is merely a show made by a crazy cunt who did some good shows in the past but fucked up the target audience for this and grabbed... God knows what.

Furfags or hipsters?

 
Fucking hipsters

It's hard to say what exactly the brony menace is. Are they a bunch of furfags or hipster fags? Both. My Little Pony is a show about neon girly animals, this gives the furfag community a boner. Now as for why hipsters love this show it's clearly obvious. Hipsters hate what adults like, however, adults do not fully understand this brony thing and they don't understand why grown males would watch a show for little girls. Thus making My Little Pony perfect hipster bait for every possible hipster reason.

Despite obviously being a bunch of closet furfags, bronies claim they are not furries and will go to great lengths to prove their point. Ironically, even though bronies claim to love and tolerate all the faces of the Internet, they constantly denounce and cast-out furries from any of their boards/discussions.

Why?

 
“ 		 
“Shame” is an interesting word. I think the cuteness and childishness appeals to our original innocence, and innocence knows no shame.

Ponies are not the beginning either; /b/tards have a history of embracing cute and innocent things. That was Boxxy’s appeal. Then there’s cats. Rozen Maiden. Robot Unicorn Attack. The list goes on. What’s interesting is this runs parallel with the /b/tard reputation for being the most vile, wretched goblins on the entire interbutts. I think they’re connected. I think in order to get a disgusting perverted adult, you have to start with a kid just oozing innocence, and beat the fuck out of them. Feed them lies, then laugh at them for believing you. Watch the disillusion sink in as their innocence is torn from them in childhood, seared out of them in school, and then are cast out into the world to be bachelor frogs. So they fap and they struggle with major depression and they rage and they do all the things damaged people do. But somewhere deep down they remember what they were. Maybe part of them is still that way. They see ponies, and damn society’s gender roles, they like them. Then they fap to them, but then they continue to watch the show because it reminds them of something good and pure they had before the hardness of the world robbed them of it.
 

„
 

—anonymous /co/

   
“ 		 
Hasbro completely missed their target audience and hit the internet virgin 18-25 year old male instead.
  		„
  		 

—Sethisto[1]

4chan stampede

 
Big Mcln spouts some info

The cancer

 
Mods = Gods
 
The post that caused the shitstorm.

The many flabby nerdsacks at co quickly latched on to the show seeing it as a colorful distraction for their otherwise pitiful lives and a decent cover for their closet pedophilic tendencies that reveal themselves through the guise of watching a television show for little girls. These flabby maniacs created thread after thread of fanart and fanfiction vomiting rainbow colored anti-lulz into 4chan to the vast and unending dismay of everyone else. A few weeks later, this cancer has found its way to b, and so another unfunny lump of cancerous fandom and asshatery was shat into the sea of diarrhea that is /b/.

The entire decision for a /b/ onslaught was decided by five fabulous tripfags known as Flutter!shy (age 16) Appple!jack (age 22) Pinkie!pie (age 20) Rainbow!dash (age 23) and BigMcIn!!toshdAyGxE (age 14) as shown in the possibly shooped screenshot to the right. And so the gigantic pony monster grew, stuffing it's friendship dick into all the threads and ejaculating despicable pony generals that scraped at the eyes of any front page lurkers. The dribbling masses of Bronies seemed unfazed by the gore and cp that /b/tards desperatley threw at them to qwell the faggotry, and so it was the mods turn to stifle this pinkie pie shaped tumor growing within /b/.

The chemo

m00t and his cronies decided they'd had enough of the bronies horse fucking faggotry and threw about gigantic banhammers left and right, squashing all the ponies into twitching masses of purple and pink guts. The bronies effectively shat their pants with rage and attempted to fight back against what they considered was infringing on their rights by spamming endless unfunny pony image macros and acting like considerably ass-pained little children. On October 22, 2011, a sticky on /b/ was posted by moot, declaring trips to be taken away and as a side-note that all bronies and pony related posts should take their leave. Off course all of the butthurt bronies slithered into the sticky so as to complain some more, only to be led like lambs to the slaughter as m00t b& their unadulterated faggotry out of existence.

The relapse

Moot suddenly realised that he is actually a complete faggot, chuckling at how he'd forgotten such a thing. Therefore deciding to open the flood gates and let the cancerous rainbow magic faggotry stream in by creating a board for all the filthy overweight cretins that worship this god awful show. Proving once and for all that 4chan is the worst place on the internet.

   
“ 		 
This is precisely why we don't negotiate with terrorists. Now that you have your own homeland you can strike at us freely.
  		„
  		 

—Anonymous


"The brony hunter's creed"
 
“ 		 
Every brony that walks this earth. Every man, who covets the evil of the pony. Every man, Who keeps a picture of fluttershy as their background. Every man, Who applies rainbow decals to their car. Who floods the boards of 4chan. Who defiles our memes. Who brings ruin and corruption to the face of our world.

Our mission is to hunt you. To crush you. To ruin you.

We shall tear at the integrity of your legions, and revel in the dying agony of your evil. We shall bring disillusion to your corrupt acclaim, and laugh in the face of your idle threats.

Your evil does not trepidate us. Your evil does not repel us.

We shall destroy and obliterate until you are nothing but a neon stain on the face of the internet.

And when the last brony is cornered, and cannot call for the assistance of its corrupt armies, When they are trapped, and are unable to brandish the blade of evil, we shall remember. Remember all the delusion you have wrought. Remember the corrupted memes. Remember the defilation of everything you have ever touched,

and we will have no mercy.
 

„
 

— Some anon that takes himself slightly too seriously

Trolling Bronies

Trolling bronies is incredibly easy, and could be considered an art in its own. To troll them, simply try the following:

  • State the fact that bronies are furfags
  • State that being a brony means you're gay
  • Insult Assburger's Syndrome and ADHD. - This is surprisingly effective on brony videos
  • To anyone who responds to your mental disorder comment negatively, tell them that they prove your point that all bronies are autistic
  • State the unfortunate truth about bronies: They will never be socially accepted, they will always be unemployed, they will always live with their parents, and most of all, the closest thing they will get to a woman is a Rainbow Dash doll. - The sad thing about these comments is that they are all true.
  • Spam their threads with pictures of older My Little Pony generations.

Videos



   
“ 		 
dash can shit in my face anytime
  		„
  		 


would you suck a pony/zebra cock dressed as a girl?'

What does it feel like to have friends

Well if the 4chan community is shit, maybe Tumblr will be better

Raging that a children's book is too simple for him

Failing to look tough, succeeding to look fat

Chris-Chan gets in on the fun

Bronies represent.

Faux News has a laugh at their expense.

Previous Video | Next Video

Ponyfag Gallery About missing Pics
  •  
    Nope, I don't see a furfag here.
  •  
    Comparable to a brony drug-dealer. (notice the srsly freaked out woman behind him)
  • Normal people obviously.
    Normal people obviously.
  •  
    This is a brony.
  •  
    So authentic!
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

Quotes

  This section needs moar quotes.
You can help by adding moar quotes.
   
“ 		 
First time I've fapped to a story in quite a while. Good show.
  		„
  		 

—Nostalgia Schmaltz

   
“ 		 
I've clopped to rainbow dash. I have a plushie pilow of her on my bed (Perfect body size) with a silicon slit on the underside. Yeah i admit its that bad. I'm not afraid to admit it but i'm not going to abandon my Dashie. Even if she's not real. I hope one day i get to marry rainbow dash and love her for real. Maybe in another life perhaps.
  		„
  		 

—dummynaruto

   
“ 		 
Anyways, here I am at 4 in the morning fapping to pony porn on my 3DS. I wonder what kids at my school would say if they found out about this. Well, they couldn't call me gay since the ponies are girls, so that pretty much rules out every insult they could come up with.

Ah, kids these days.
 

„
  		 

—moltensnow

   
“ 		 
Fluttershy is my favorite.... first the futa story... now this!? Who in the hell would rape fluttershy!? She too dam adorabe, oh wait yeah I figured it out Oc is Anon. Must not read this... clop rating 4.... must resist. Noooo....
  		„
  		 

—ilovebagelz

   
“ 		 
Interesting fic by what I read so far I haven't had time to read the final chapter yet. It seams to be fairly well written, not a masterpiece to be sure though.

I know rape is wrong and all I would never do it my self, but it is one of my weird kinks that gets me off. It's not so bad when it is created via literature or a drawing though because no one is hurt.

Although I do have to say Pinkie Pie's situation made me sick, having her raped on her birthday was just to much even for a work of fiction.
 

„
  		 

—Demi Freak

Previous Quote | Next Quote

 

Brony is part of a series on

Furfaggotry

Visit the Furfaggotry Portal for complete coverage.

 

Brony is part of a series on My Little Pony

[CLOP CLOP CLOPFRIENDSHIP IS MAGIC]
Brony
is part of a series on
the cancer that is killing /b/
 
Sources [-+]
Symptoms [-+]
Forced Memes [-+]
Treatment [-+]
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