Eternal September

Vint Cerf: One of the men who helped Al Gore invent the Internets tells it like it is.

Eternal September is an ongoing event that sums up the beginning of the end for Usenet and the internets as we know it. Way back in the early 90's, the internets were getting more available to people as prices for computers went down and gaining access became easier. Traditionally, Usenet would see surges of newbies every September when the school year started (usenet began in universities). The surge of stupid newbies would eventually die down after a month or so and the quality of the place would return to normal as the newbs would start to behave and learn their place. This was the standard peaceful cycle.

However in 1993 usenet was flooded by a tidal wave of a worse kind of newbies, more numerous, stupid and arrogant than the regular influx. This was caused by AOL offering usenet access to its users. For those who don't know: AOL was notorious for being one of the first cancers of the internets, because it made it easy for idiots to gain internet access. Traditionally you actually had to have some intelligence to use computers and set up internet access; this is why AOL users were notorious for excessive use of 1337SPEAK (Sometimes this would even be referred to as "AOLspeak"), due to 13 year old boys being too lazy to type a few extra letters.

When September finally rolled around this time the faggotry was unimaginable. The sheer amount of stupidity was endless, and many who thought that things would die down after September were proven wrong. Some attribute the meow wars as a result of the September that never ended. A year later this term was coined by this quote:

	“	It's moot now. September 1993 will go down in net.history as the September that never ended.	„
	—Dave Fischer confirms all is lost

A Tribute to the tragedy by one of the most respected bands of all time, Green Day

The theory applied to other parts of the internets

The phrase "Eternal September," like "jumped the shark," summed up the common phenomena of how when something gets popular, it goes to shit.

The word "September" can be used as a verb to indicate the process: "Yeah, Caturday was great, but then those 'lolcat' people septembered it."

The cancer that is killing /b/

Notice how sharp it climbs? Yep, that's the cancer spreading

This is known as 4chan's eternal September, when 4chan turned from a bunch of mature adult SomethingAwful goons who pretend to be retards and indulge in the twisted nature of Japanese pop culture, into a bunch of teenage retards whoring for attention and taking things too seriously. This influx of newbies were coined as "Newfags", but unfortunately the word has lost all meaning since the same said newfags who now have been there say, a month or two now are trying too hard to act like they are veterans now and go around calling everyone "newfags".

GRIDS that is killing ED

And the pattern continues...

Not even Encyclopedia Dramatica (NEDM?) itself is safe from this phenomena as seen with the sudden drop in quality over time. First noted in the Hamtaro's Theory article, but became worse. ED's AIDS seems to come from 2 fronts:

1. New users to fail to understand that ED is here to document drama, not be an attack site or a personal army center.
2. With many of ED's users and content surrounding 4chan, ED has contracted second-hand failure by being infiltrated by the "newfags".

Many of the new articles are made by morons who cannot be bothered to lurk for even a small amount of time. They just love to dive in and start shitting up the place with failures that can be categorized as so:

• Exhibit A
• Exhibit B
• Exhibit C
• Exhibit D

Is there hope?

Although it is a terminal illness there are treatments available. One of the best ways is to nip this shit in the bud by banning users/members for unacceptable levels of faggotry. If you don't enforce a standard, then users will think that being a retard is acceptable, and new users will learn off of the retards and so on and so forth creating a feedback loop of stupid that spreads.

• ED Improvement Drive
• The Chemo That Is Curing /b/
• The Stupid Filter

Unfortunately enforcing rules causes massive amounts of butthurt from newfags who will pull all sorts shit like hacking or vandalism which is the equivalent to throwing a temper tantrum. Shame that this is truly the most spoiled generation of little shits that were not spanked.

See Also:

• Elitism
• Sturgeon's Law
• Bunker's Law

External Links:

• The Jargon file
• Web 2.0: The Cancer That Is Killing The Internets

Eternal September is part of a series on Usenet.

[CollapseExpand]

Basics: Flamewar • Followup • Sock puppets • Spam • Godwin's Law • NO BINARIES • Newsgroups: alt.fan.karl-malden.nose • alt.religion.scientology • alt.suicide.holiday • alt.syntax.tactical • alt.tasteless Lore: Eternal September • Guy Macon's original post • Meow Wars • Raping Little Suzy • Susie Q's Party Game Denizens: B1FF • Darkfalz • David Gerard • Derek Smart • Jai Maharaj • Kelly Martin • Kerry Keane • Kevin L. O'Brien • Kibo • Magoo • Nicholas Morency • Onideus Mad Hatter • Raksha • Ray Gordon • Richard Bullis • Ryan Hawe • Schattie • Sine Nomine • Terryeo • Tom Galloway • Tony Sidaway • Wil Sinclair