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David Icke

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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David Icke is keeping us safe from the reptoid invasion.


OH NOES!11 DEY R HEAR!11
The Prophet David Icke
George H.W. Bush, as seen in lower vibration 4th dimension lizard battle mode.

David "D.Icke" Icke (more like David Kike, amirite?) is a former English Soccer player (and the SON OF GOD) who according to him, later came into contact with an extra-dimensional being known to him as the Godhead. This being told him that reptilian beings who had broken out from another dimension were posing as world leaders in an effort to bring about a New World Order. These beings according to Icke are also controlling non-reptilian politicians through Jew DNA. This brought Icke to come to the conclusion that JEWS DID WTC.

David Icke Reptilian?

Fritz Springmeier, whom David Icke plagiarizes from has been locked away by the Reptilians

A popular conspiracy theory is that Wut David Icke is a closet Reptilian/Superjew himself, and is trying to spread crapola against those who are really trying to expose the Illuminati. For example, David Icke's prominence corresponds to the rise of a genuine researcher, Fritz Springmeier, who was framed and jailed by the Illuminati. They then let David Icke go around spewing his shape-shifting reptilian bullshit to discredit the followers of Springmeier. David Icke HAS plagiarized from Springmeier in many of his books.

David Icke on the Jews

   
 
I strongly believe that a small Jewish clique which has contempt for the mass of Jewish people worked with non-Jews to create the First World War, the Russian Revolution, and the Second World War. This Jewish/non-Jewish Elite used the First World War to secure the Balfour Declaration and the principle of the Jewish State of Israel). They then dominated the Versailles Peace Conference and created the circumstances which made the Second World War inevitable. They financed Hitler to power in 1933 and made the funds available for his rearmament. Therefore it is without a shadow of a doubt that JEWS DID WTC!
 

 
 

—David Icke, on how he needs to lrn2history

He has never explained how his own birth into an ultra - orthodox Hasidic Jewish family influenced his attitude towards his fellow Jews.

Icke is one of the few people known in society to have transformed from being a mundane into a complete nutbar in the public eye. Most nutbars were/are nutbars from birth/first attaining celebrity status. This change can also be attributed to the public perception of Michael Jackson who also hates Jews.

Some people would say that David Icke is Batshit Insane. Others would say that he's a complete Fucktard. Whatever side of the debate you stand on, everyone agrees that Icke is a veritable Lulz Machine and/or CA$H Generator via the fine art of {$.(I)KAM}EZ.$.


He doth protest too much

Check out that lust for Sheckels

Do you really think that David Kike could be the leader of the New Age shit party and somehow avoid The Disease of Israel?

Here's his game:

  1. Get the Sheckels
  2. Sheckels rule everything around him
  3. Z.O.G
  4. Zionist Occupation Government y'all.

David Icke on the Origin of the Universe

SRSLY

Icke claims that the entire universe was created by sound. As you can probably tell, this is just recycled religious bullshit ( "In the beginning was the Word ... and the Word was God" - John 1:1, the Hindu "Ohm", etc.)

Icke claims the galaxies were created by sound, however sound cannot travel through space. If you enlighten David to this fact he will ignore you, generally because

"Everything is sound, and it is sound that turns matter and energy into form" - David Icke. (T.W.A.T.)

As you can see according to David, everything is sound. Is my cock sound? It is not. Sound turns matter and energy into form? Well yes if you vibrate something that sticks together, for example iron filings and plasticine, but if it's just about anything else, it won't work.

David bases his theories on a bit of truth and a lot of fiction which equals bullshit. However some retarded people believe him because they like the idea of it. They also buy his crappy books. He also believes George Bush and the royal family are part of the higher-dimensional reptile/Jew conspiracy to unite the world under an intergalactic new world order.

David Icke on being a Sucker

In 2006 Icke was possibly one of the first people in at least 100 years to lose the rights to his own books:

 
 
The background is this. The man involved, called Royal Adams from Missouri, incorporated David's books and company in his own name with David completely excluded. This was without David's permission – of course.

Imagine that. You have worked for 16 years against all the odds, and in the face of enormous abuse and ridicule, to create cutting edge material to alert people to their plight and some guy just puts it all under his own name and tells you he is in control of everything. Gutted is not the word.

David researched and wrote the books; arranged for them to be designed, proof-read and indexed; arranged for the art work and the production of the disk for printing; and paid for all these things to be done.

But when he took steps to have his life's work returned to his control Adams stopped him getting any income from the sales of his OWN books. Adams said that he would only consider restoring the income - David and his family's livelihood - if David signed over rights to all his future works to him.

Adams also demanded $100,000 for David to regain control of his own books – a sum that could have destroyed everything David had spent 16 years creating. Adams also refused numerous requests to make the full accounts of the company available so David could see what he was dealing with.

It gave David only two choices: To accept this extraordinary injustice or take legal action to recover control of what was his and restore the income on which his entire work depends to survive and continue, and to secure the livelihood on which his family depend.

In simple terms, the system means that even if someone does something illegal it costs you enormous amounts of money in lawyers fees to put it right and recover what was yours in the first place.

David has won an interim order stopping Adams selling his books and keeping the money, which will now be held in an independent account pending the legal outcome. The judge ordered the accounts and print disks to be handed over to David.

It was when the judge signed this order that the above email was sent to David's office and Adams launched a "Hate Icke" website. In this it is said that David's books are "overpriced" when we have emails in which David is the one stopping Adams pricing the books too high. David is also supposed to be a "Jew" when he lives in a small flat with one bedroom and Adams has a million dollar house.

The point is that David's efforts to regain control of his own books, and therefore keep them in circulation, is costing a fortune in legal fees and we are asking for help in meeting these costs (see below). If we don't get this help then David's work is in serious danger of disappearing within weeks – which is what the above email says is the whole idea.
 


 

Sauce

Oh noes. :(

Parliamentary candidate

In 2008 Icke stood as a candidate in the Haltemprice and Howden by-election against David Davis. If elected he pledged to unmask David D. Davidson as an illuminati gatekeeper, even though DDD has a track record of (a) having a soul and (b) resigning from his cabinet post to fight an election on the ID card issue (which he won with a 70% turn out).

Ever the savvy operator, Icke announced that, if elected MP, he would refuse to swear the Oath of Allegiance required to take a seat in the House of Commons. Thus meaning that his potential voters might as well fold their ballot papers into darts and chuck them out the window. His campaign consisted of his usual online ravings, hoping that his captive audience of shut-in paranoids would miraculously manage to go outside on the right date during polling hours, eventually locate their local voting stations, and ultimately mark their ballot papers correctly. The results were entirely consistent with Icke's original strategy: To this very day, he has not been seen in Parliament.

The great Prophet David Icke making his pornographic debut.
The Adventures of David Icke

Teh truth?

David was a goalkeeper for Coventry City but never made it as a professional. It seems he then disappeared into obscurity again until he got a job in local BBC radio commentating on Snooker (possibly the greatest sport ever). The powers that be decided they had bigger plans for Dave after he committed career suicide on Wogan. They reeled him to Hollywood (about 1h:30 in) where he would start his divine mission to become the new messiah, he met a fringe loony and 'discovered' DMT, peyote, and acid for the first time ever! Also while watching too many re-runs of Sci-fi show V, he realized for the first time that there was another plane of existence (probably where he is considered sane) and was the first person EVER to work out that you could pretend you were in that other plane! and lo, Dave had invented spiritualism! So he realized lots of books and promotional DVDs.

He admitted "(He) studied the military/government mind-control programs and techniques in great detail for many years during the late-1990s and across 2000," [1] and is now using this on the tin foil hat brigade to launch a war against the repeaters of the established order of shapeshifting reptiles.

Actually Dave was perceiving other 'possible' dimensions and believing in the lizard conspiracy he makes it more real, even when he claims he is fighting against it. As on a a quantum level, belief of an event is a more powerful the actuality and that personalized reality if repeated enough taints the collective reality.

Today David Icke runs his own forum where he lets the crazy people of the net write his next book for him. And in case you did not know the Illuminati killed Michael Jackson.

Had to pay more than $170,000 for his lies

Icke wrote yet another lie about one of the many reptilians taking human form, namely Richard Warman, who used his reptilian lawyer skills to get a shitload of cash from Icke. Of course David has not published this massive defeat anywhere, but he was quick to announce his fund raiser to buy his own Reptilian Jewish lawyers in defense.

   
 
This settlement exposes Icke’s argument that no one had ever sued him because his allegations were true as nothing more than a fallacy
 

 
 

—Warman shitting all over Icke

D.Icke's Law

"As a discussion grows longer, the probability of blaming Jews, Reptilians and Aliens approaches one."

People Who Love David Icke

External Links


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