User:Anwar Sadat's Horny Ghost/sandbox/solar system

The Solar System
Shown to Scale

Our Solar System is comprised of a single star and a multitude of celestial-bodies which rotate around it; all of which formed following the collapse of a giant molecular cloud of DOOM less than 9000 years ago, according to scripture. The solar system is the setting of the two Star Wars trilogies and more importantly, the home to everything we call lulz. It is a list of discrete members, and like dinosaurs and rocks, so acts like nectar to autists everywhere.

Aspie Bait

The fact is the solar system is an invented construct, existing only in the minds of astronomers, no two of which agree on it's members, boundaries, or anything else having to do with it. Armed with only Bill Nye the Science Guy by way of education, in step the aspies. They insist that their understanding is holy writ, and anyone who disagrees is clearly educated stupid. The best example is the Pluto drama of 200whateverthefuck where every aspie came out of their e-caves to moan at the addition of “dwarf” to the classification of Pluto. Angry letters were sent to people with no control, YouTube comments were angrily thumbs-upped, and short-lived Facebook petitions were signed en masse. Aspies lack any introspection, and so the fact that nothing had changed didn't quench the fires of aspie rage.

Edit Wars

The idea of the solar system, being an invention of humanity affects nothing whatsoever, and so attracts spurgs like Mexican roofers to a taco truck. Perhaps the single most pointless of the Wikipedia edit wars, archive page after archive page is crammed full with tasty aspie tears shed over whether of not both words of the solar system are capitalized. Neither side did much but cite examples, hoping that repetition will win converts for the first time ever. All other edits are attempts to add whatever golf ball sized rock NASA scientists point to this week to justify their jobs. It need hardly be said that none of the editors have any training, experience, or knowledge of any sort in the subject of astronomy.

Trolling

These are well trod trolling grounds, and semi-protection means you'll have to put some time in “correcting” formulas before improving the coverage to make it stick.

• Start another battle over capitalization

• Change each and every instance of “the sun” to “Sol”, like the queer who wrote the first draft of this article.

• Invent myths from cultures about the moon, with bonus points to inventing cultures to match.

• Include a picture of the solar system to scale, as requested.

• Destroy the solar system.

	“	I have just had to revert about six consecutive vandal edits. I have to wonder what it is about this page that attracts so many vandals. Also, given that their content was rather offensive, it seems strange that no one noticed them for over an hour.	„
	—Serendipodous. Circa 2005.

	“	I'm not sure if this is a valid measure of vandal attraction, but once the first fifty edits in the history section consist entirely of reverted vandalism, I think it's time to put a lock on it.	„
	—Serendipodous, two years later, killing all the joy.

	“	Why is Wikipedia so afraid of capitalization? Do people think they will accidently become German?	„
	—AjaxSmack, expressing a reasonable concern.

	“	It's not fear of captialisation, it's fear of improper capitalisation. If we succumbed to every temptation to capitalise, we would suddenly find ourselves back in the 17th century, inne whiche alle Wordes of Sufficiente Importe were Capitalized or writtene inne Italicke fonte.	„
	—Killjoy Serendipodous, explaining his rationale for the rape/murder of GoddessMillenia

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The Planets

• Mercury
• Venus
• Earth
• Mars
• Jupiter
• Saturn
• Uranus
• Neptune

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