Emu War

The great Emu War was a war fought between the entire country of Australia and approximately 20,000 Emus in 1932. Since the operation took place in Western Australia, the effort was doomed from the start, ultimately leading to a decisive emu victory despite the fact the Australians were armed with machine guns. No seriously.

The enemy.

Bringing up the Emu War is a common practice on 4chan's /pol/ and int boards as a catch all response to the ever increasing problem of Aussie shitposting, which currently represents at least 90% of all posts from the country.

Emu War: A history

Throughout the 1920s and 30s, many Australian farmers were becoming upset about how a native species was using their farm land to migrate to the coast after the breeding season and, in the process, ate all their crops. Since most of the farmers were World War I veterans and they were only facing a few thousand birds with brains literally the size of a walnut AND they were armed with machine guns, all expected this to be an easy cull, right?

Wrong, The cull was largely unsuccessful due to the bird's habit of traveling in large groups so that when someone opened fire on them, they would end up running off in all directions in an orgy of failure. All in all, after 5 attempts to exterminate the emus the farmers just gave up trying and the world's stupidest bird was forever famed for humiliating veterans of the world's deadliest war.

• 
  Postbellum situation report.
• 
  The truth isn't much better.

On 4chan

Since almost all posts by Australians on 4chan contribute absolutely nothing in the means of quality or even relevance to the OP it has lead to many posters simply responding with "Yes, but we can at least win a war against oversized chickens." Which is often met with the almost equally predictable "Can't handle the banter." It can sometimes be a somewhat successful tactic in removing Australians from intelligent discussion on /pol/ and /int/ but most of the time, it just encourages them.

The battle of Kiska

Nevar forget.

A response to Emu War posts made by Americans or Canadians, is pointing out that the two nations managed to suffer significant death, injury, and damage while trying to secure an island from the Japanese during World War II, despite the fact the island was completely uninhabited at the time. It has been suggested by many that this is because Canadians are hopeless at warfare, hence the heavy causalities suffered. Posting about the battle of Kiska on 4chan will result in instant arse pain and completely derail any hope of a thread and replace it with the debate which has plagued mankind for years:

	“	Which is more humiliating: losing to the world's stupidest birds or losing to an uninhabited lump of rock which is part of your own country?	„

The answer of which shall forever be unknown.

See Also

• Australia
• /pol/
• /int/

External links

• Emu War

Emu War is part of a series on Ausfailia [CollapseExpand]

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Featured article August 5 & 6, 2015
Preceded by IRC	Emu War	Succeeded by Pacificoceanasia