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Amy's Baking Company
Amy's Baking Company, run by Amy and Samy Bouzaglo, is a WORLD CLASS restaurant in Scottsdale, Arizona, where you can expect to be treated with speedy service in a friendly atmosphere and treated with the respect that you, as a discerning customer of exquisite taste, so richly deserve.
LOL, just kidding, it's a festering shithole run by a pair of self-centered, ego maniacal, batshit insane assholes who can't even take the slightest measure of criticism without having an epic meltdown like an angry toddler in a therapy session. While normal people can generally take criticism with an open mind, or at least a closed mouth, little miss former jail bait Amy and her ever devoted, doting, sugar daddy husband (who's old enough to be her dad) instead respond to any form of criticism as if it were a directed personal attack on them and their character. To the point where they quite literally explode in frothing rage before "taking their ball and going home"...by which we mean that they SHUT THEIR ENTIRE RESTAURANT DOWN, every other minute Amy reaches the point where she can no longer function as an adult (which is pretty well a daily occurrence).
The Restaurant
Amy Bossington had a dream. She wanted to open her very own restaurant. Unfortunately, she had no training, and couldn't cook worth shit. Then along came Samy Bouzaglo. For reasons too fucking retarded to list, he decided to fund her stupid dream, and the two were later bound forever in ill-advised matrimony. In 2010, Amy's Baking Company was born, and didn't do half-bad for a while. But then they decided to turn their bakery into a bistro.
You Just Don't Know Good Food
Almost immediately, they started receiving negative reviews on Yelp, much to the butthurt of Amy. The reviews cited piss-poor service and lousy food with ingredients that taste like shit together, on top of the rude behavior of the managers. Amy and her husband decided that the only way to fix this problem was to maturely respond to the negative criticisms by logging onto Yelp and insulting people in a five-star review of their own restaurant.
— Amy, on Yelp | ||
Take careful note of the ALL CAPS, baseless insults, and wild excuses. They will be a recurring theme.
This incident was later picked up by the local news, who wrote an article about it on their site.
Kitchen Nightmares
Gordon Ramsay decided to try his hand at saving this sinking ship of a restaurant on his television show, Kitchen Nightmares, in 2013. Needless to say, it didn't go very well. A clip of the episode was posted on Reddit before it was aired, and was later taken down and had its comments disabled following the inevitable shitstorm.
Right off the bat, Amy exposes her craziness to the world by rambling about how haters and bloggers have been trash-talking her business and lying about her food, how she loves her cats, and how she knows Ramsay will tell everybody how lovely her food is.
And thus begins the downward spiral into chaos. We learn that she thinks that the bun on a salmon burger should be spewing liquids at the slightest touch, that raw pizza dough is "crisp and crunchy", that her husband steals tips from waitresses (which in this case isn't technically illegal because they do pay full-time wages to the staff), that she sells ravioli she buys from the grocery store and calls it fresh, and how, like an aspie on deviantArt, she and her husband collapse into sputtering insanity at the slightest hint of criticism.
He gets approached by former employees too, and they tell him that Amy fired at least 50 (it ends up being over 100) staff members in one year, and that Samy had his employees wash his car for him.
Following a second conversation with Amy and Samy that starts off with them "clarifying" a few things with him, namely that the reason some orders MAY have been a little messed up was because Ramsay was distracting Amy by being in the kitchen and disrupting the normal flow of things (even though he spent most of his time out in the dining room), Ramsay decides that he can't help them. He does the only sensible thing shown in this episode, and just walks the fuck away.
Funnily enough, this is probably the calmest Ramsay's ever been on television. And considering he just straight walks out on the restaurant at the end, that's saying something.
The Aftermath
Almost straight away after this was aired, Amy's Baking Company's Facebook page exploded. Like the mature, responsible, even-headed adults they are, they figured this was the perfect opportunity for an ALL-CAPS SHIT-FLINGING CONTEST. This went on for several hours, during which time this shit was spread all over Facebook.
The next day, they claimed their page was hacked.
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What the fuck am I reading? -
He's going to call the Internet police. -
Hey, at least she hates Reddit, she can't be all bad. -
Racism is good for business. -
Ressling?
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Say it to my face fucker not online see what happens -
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Her cats are her "kids". No, really. -
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Lol, okay
Like a Phoenix From The Ashes...
ABC temporarily closed its doors about a week ago at time of writing, but says it'll be re-opening on May 21st. They held a job fair on Sunday where they hired 30 new crew members, and we can expect them all to be fired within a month.
See also
External Links
- Their website
- ABC on Yelp. Tell them how much you love their food.
