Clarence/Episode Guide

Season One	Season Two	Shorts

Season 1

1. Fun Dungeon Face-Off

Mary, Clarence and his friends go to a KFC with a black cashier - Jeff orders just fries. Clarence makes the fatal mistake of taking Jeff's fries while he's at the toilet. Jeff goes insane and chases Clarence throughout the "Fun Dungeon" in an anti-climactic showdown that parodies Star Wars. They make up in the end and Clarence steals a pair of shoes belonging to a 5-year-old girl.

2. A Pretty Great Day with a Girl

Amy makes Clarence her bitch and they go on a bike ride into the forest and Belson sees, getting the rest of his faggotry gang to go after them thinking they're going to Make Out. They climb an erratic and have a discussion about SRS BUSINESS and are interrupted by Belson and friends and they start throwing pinecones at each other for the rest of the episode, they also threw Sumo in for no fucking reason too.

3. Money Broom Wizard

Clarence and friends use 1337-haxor skillz on all of the games at the arcade because they only have one dollar to share over their poor asses.

4. Lost in a Supermarket

Clarence finds Sumo in the supermarket while trying to find a gallon of skim milk for his Mom. The duo fuck everything up in the store as per usual and crash into Mom, scattering her coupon collection all over the place. It is revealed that all women have an unbearbale coupon fetish, and snatch them like a flock of birds pecking at seeds. To rectify this incident, Clarence steals a dozen coupons like a fucking nigger and reduces the price of the monthly groceries from 280 dollars to just 10 dollars. Sumo also molests a pedophile staff member named "Josh", and he is subsequently v& for chasing a minor.

5. Clarence's Millions

The first time Clarence is actually seen in school. He tried to re-institute Communism through the invention of his own currency, the "Clarence Dollar", but what always happens when Communism is practiced happens: Disaster.

6. Clarence gets a girlfriend

Title says it all. Clarence hooks up with Ashley, which infuriates Jeff because it was his undertaking to be the "Supreme Gentleman". Sumo teaches Clarence how to be an Alpha-Male, but of course he fucks everything up on the date and breaks-up after spilling chocolate milk on "Assley" (as he calls her). In the end, Clarence's friends fondle a corpse. Sumo's brother is apparently a polygynist. There's a brief scene of Clarence in a bikini, proving once again that those who work in making children's entertainment are pedophiles.

7. Jeff's New Toy

Clarence destroys Jeff's sought-after, limited-edition action figure when Jeff refuses to take it out of the packaging to play with. So much for hoarding plastic crap, amirite?

8. Dinner Party

Clarence's family attends a Jewish couple's dinner party and Clarence's filthy-ape immature step-dad (named Chad) gets bored. Chad allows all of the children at the party to explore the attic and because Clarence is such a fat fuck his weight breaks through the roof of the house and kills everyone.

9. Honk

Clarence terrorizes everyone with a horn.

10. Dollar Hunt

Clarence and Jeff accidentally hide a $20 dollar bill in the backyard instead of a $1 dollar bill for some gangstas to find. When the $20 dollar bill is found, some emo faggot tears it in half and eats it then commits suicide, never to be seen again for the remainder of the episode. It turns out the $20 dollars was for the ingredients to cook Mary's casserole for her friends that evening. To compensate, Clarence and Sumo throw a bunch a random shit into a tray and slam it into the oven. Mary's friends eat the diarrhea-casserole anyway and some poor bastard dies at the bottom of a ditch in Clarence's backyard. Clarence dismembered and cannibalized the corpse the following day.

11. Zoo

Clarence and Belson are forced to partner-up for a school excursion at the local zoo. Their teacher accidentally leaves the two dipshits behind, and they get locked in at night. You could only imagine how this catastrophe turns out...

12. Rise and Shine

Clarence acts like a retard for 2 whole hours starting from 5:00 AM. He discovers a wild mountain lion (which he mistakes for a bear at first) and reports it to the cops. Said mountain lion is tranquilized, hurting Clarence's feelings. Dear God the music and characters in this episode are fucking atrocious, oh wait, that's nothing out the ordinary with this series...

13. Man of the house

While Clarence's dumbass parents go out for the evening, they leave their mentally-crippled excuse of a son in charge of the house, and as we all expected, he transforms the household into a diseased crap-heap in a matter of minutes. Clarence also invites the only people in the world who care about him couldn't give a fuck. At some stage the trio are convinced that a "Burger" (Burgler) might break into the house, and in defense, the kids rig the whole property with booby traps. Meanwhile, Chad forgets his V.I.P tickets and rushes back home to retrieve them. Chad gets smashed in the legs with two bowling balls and Clarence does a hit-and-run once Mary discovers the dismembered, half-eaten teenage boys strewn around the house. Makes you wonder why Mary didn't abort Clarence before he fucked-up everyone's sanity.

14. Puddle Eyes

Clarence falls asleep face down into a mud puddle and gets mud in his eyes. He doesn't suffocate sadly. He looks a lot like a Harlequin Fetus in this episode.

15. Dream Boat

Sumo builds a boat to earn the love and compassion of his careless bogan father.

16. Slumber Party

Clarence is accidentally invited to a slumber party where he falsely leads Jeff into believing he's got a hot-shot with the only chance of getting some pusi in his shallow, materialistic life. PROTIP: This episode makes a direct reference to "Straight Illin'".

17. Nature Clarence

Josh (from 'Lost in the Supermarket') makes his return in this episode, luring Clarence and the gang into his car and driving them to the middle of Africa, or some shit. When the car breaks down, Josh becomes a full-blown psychotic bastard and throws himself off of a cliff, only to have his crush "Nature Kate" rescue him after Clarence farts on his head (no, we're not even making this up).

18. Average Jeff

This episode chronicles the life of Jeff Randell.

19. Lizard Day Afternoon

Clarence and Sumo follow a lizard around the neighborhood, leading them to good fortune while Jeff 'Spergs out over a new 3D Virtual Reality video-game console which Belson uses to play realistic hentai games 24/7.

20. The Forgotten

Chad is a lazy grease-mop and forgets to pick up Clarence from school. Another socially-awkward fuckwit named "Brady" is also left behind after school hours. Clarence takes Brady on a pointless journey through the state of Arizona because he has nothing better to do. That's pretty much it.

21. Neighborhood Grill

Clarence's family are dining at the "Chuckleton's" restaurant when Clarence sees his teacher, Ms. Baker, sitting at a nearby seat. Ms. Baker is going on a blind date, and discovers her partner for the night, an elderly wanker (named "Clarence") who writes down every detail of every... fucking... thing that takes place within his vicinity. Clarence barges into Ms. Baker's personal space and causes her to retreat into the women's toilets. Clarence (both the Sperg and oldfag) and Chad follow her into the women's toilets without any fucking awareness as to what they have just done. It's only until Clarence forces himself underneath the stall door and tries to touch his teacher when Mary interrupts and yells for all the men to GTFO. Without even giving a shit, both Clarences, Ms. Baker, and the parents have a fiesta together (despite not even knowing the old-pedo Clarence) and everyone laughs at Josh when he slips and a fork gets lodged into his eye-socket, because kids find mutilation hilarious, right? Has absolutely nothing to do with neighborhood grills but holy shit there is a gay couple in it. This is important because CN is now

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22. Belson's Sleepover

Belson tries to prank every poor fucker who got invited to his house. All of the guests plan to prank Belson back, starting with Clarence cross-dressing and luring Belson into the basement, and Sumo pwning him with a trash can full of puke and shit.

23. Too Gross for Comfort

Some ape-bitch named Chelsea gets invited to the "Guy-scraper", determined that nothing can gross her out. Everyone takes turns sharing Creepypastas until Chelsea and Sumo fuck kiss. OMFG SO GROSS!!!!11!one! She even admits that shes seen the grossest videos on the internet.

24. Pilot Expansion

Is literally just the pilot with a song in the middle and the extra scenes before and after it. It's not even re-animated or re-voiced at all.

25. Patients

Clarence had to deal with Chara while his mom get treated for her newfound carpel tunnel that came from having to repeatedly deal with a customer called 'Sandy'. Remember her, she'll come up again later.

26. Rough Riders Elementary

After tasting KFC's new sauce, Clarence finds he hates it so much he took the time to author a fucking fanfiction about how it's use in brainwashing children to work for them. In his story, Aberdeen Elementary School becomes a dictatorship under the control of KFC. Josh is the Führer, by the way. Just another example of modern storyboard artists incorporating Neo-Nazism into children's television.

27. Nothing Ventured

Chad and Mr. Sumozski are drunk off their asses when they try to start a business while Clarence and Sumo "invest" by capturing a fuck-load of cockroaches and disposing of them in everybody's house at night spreading disease and food poisoning across the town. They're literally following in Stan Pines' footsteps to scam everyone.

28. Bedside Manners

Belson ends up in the hospital so Clarence comes to help ruin everything using a 10-foot-long Sub.

29. Jeff Wins

Clarence teaches Jeff how to cook human flesh for some cooking competition and he inadvertently wins because Clarence swapped the name tags under the presumption that Gordon Ramsay would shoot Jeff had he have tasted his shit. It also revealed that Jeff has two moms. Again, we gotta have dat

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element in the show.

30. Suspended

Clarence and Sumo get suspended from school after pulling a prank on Ms. Baker. The duo learn lots of new things that they would never learn in school, and somehow manage to fix a boiler. Moral of this episode: fuck school.

31. Turtle Hats

Ms. Baker receives an SMS from her boyfriend which reads; "I think U R Turtle Hats". As a result of this typo, Ms. Baker accidentally convinces her students to work on an assignment on "Turtle Hats". Turns out the message was supposed to read "Totally hot". Fucking autocorrect.

32. Goose Chase

Clarence gets terrorized by a goose and develops Ornithophobia.

33. Goldfish Follies

BACK TO THE 1930'S ZOMG!!!1ONE!

34. Chimney

Clarence and friends find a stray dog and decide to keep it, naming it "Chimney". Everybody gets stuck in a wishing well after Jeff tries to fetch a Frisbee but Chimney saves them (unfortunately) by offering a shit-ton of sticks to build a ladder with. This episode has nothing to do with chimneys by the way. At the end of this episode the developers used the fucking Mac Voiceover utility for when Chimney speaks.

35. Straight Illin'

You are honestly LESS likely to puke watching Mr. Pickles than this episode.

Avoid this episode at ALL COSTS!!!

36. Dust Buddies

Belson's Mom forces her lazy-ass faggot son to do manual labor while she hacks into his WoW account for great justice. It's also worth mentioning that Belson's neighbor is a goddamn pedophile, I shit you not.

37. Hurricane Dillis

Clarence's senile dwarf grandmother, "Dilliss", moves in and fucks everything over.

38. Hoofin' it

Clarence and Sumo play PETA by sabotaging a redneck festival. The fat wanker substitutes himself with a pig named "Buttersctoch" so that she doesn't get raped by the people of Arizona. Comedy for Rednecks.

39. Detention

The kids at Aberdale Elementary lace the teacher's food with sleeping pills and turn the detention room into a disco while he's asleep.

40. Hairence

Mary opens up a hair salon in the Summer holidays where one particular customer named Sandy (from "Patients") makes all of the employees her slaves. Sandy is a disgustingly obese nigga landwhale hunk-of-shit that uses a scooter to get around all the Goddamn time, and demands satisfaction with every visit to the hair salon. She is literally Honey Boo Boo in cartoon form. Clarence invents a huge model of himself made out of hair follicles which he creatively names "Hairence". Hairence anally wrecks Sandy and permabans her from the hair salon, sending her all the way through the desert where she finally dies of starvation.

41. Lil' Buddy

Clarence loses recess time because he wouldn't stop fucking with a doll he brought to school and subsequently, he slowly becomes a juvenile delinquent while his mother and friends do nothing about it.

42. Chalmers Santiago

Mary encourages her son to trespass the neighbor's property, because that's what good parents do. Clarence discovers that Belson is the only occupant of this residence and that he is using Clarence's electricity to play his vidya gaemz with, but nobody gives a shit because in Aberdale it's okay to be a criminal.

43. Tuckered Boys

Clarence and friends trip out on their own psychosis.

44. Water Park

Clarence and friends line up at the "Curd Churner", a water slide that operates from the rooftop of a tall, unstable building susceptible to massive damage. While waiting in the line, Clarence sees the Water Park's mascot, "Squirty" and harasses him non-stop, going as far as to steal the costume like a crazy nigger. Josh (surprisingly hasn't killed himself at this point), goes postal and chases Clarence to the top of the Turd Turner like the pedophile he is. Shit, that Squirty costume means so much to him, he literally throws himself off the top of the building and tries to kill Clarence (and himself) in mid-air. Everyone survives, unfortunately, and the episode ends.

45. Where the Wild Chads Are

Chad takes Clarence to a camp site and fucks him in the asshole. Clarence RAEGS and in retaliation, throws all of the camping supplies into a river in an attempt to challenge Chad into survival of the fittest. Chad proves he's a good stepdad by prolonging Clarence's inevitable death when he nearly drowns in the river.

Holy shit Chad is an Adventure Time fanfaggot in this episode.

46. Breehn Ho

Jeff and Breehn have a bitch-fight over a stupid board game. Breehn emo-quits by jumping out of the window and getting stuck in a huge flood, forcing Clarence, Sumo and Jeff to go rescue him. Chad's chainsaw terrorizes the kids and somehow functions while submerged in water and nearly rips Clarence's stump-dick open in one scene.

47. The Big Petey Pizza Problem

Jeff celebrates his 10th birthday at the local bowling alley, but another classmate named Gilben is also throwing a birthday party at the same location. Jeff is full of angst and threatens to drop a bowling ball on Gilben because according to Jeff; there's no such thing as sharing a birthday on the same date. Some other crap happens and Jeff apologizes for being a complete Sperg. "Gilben" is literally a soulless, inanimate object and doesn't even react to anything whatsoever, thus meaning the entire plot of this episode was useless.

48. The Break Up

More of Jeff's crippling assburgers is portrayed in this episode. Sumo triggers Jeff and they both get into a fight, leaving Clarence in charge of re-uniting the two fags. Completely original plot.

49. In Dreams

Clarence's dreams give him an existential crisis.

50. Balance

Balance escape the rabbit hole and tries to fuck Ms. Baker.

51. Spooky Boo

Clarence, Jeff, Sumo, Chelsea, and Mavis explore a haunted mansion on Halloween night, but reveal that the haunted mansion is actually a retirement home. What the fuck?

Season 2

1. The Interrogation

One of the school's spare teachers throw's the students under the bus.

2. Lost Playground

The forces above (Mommy issues) kills Aberdale Elementary's playground budget.

3. Bird Boy Man

More redneck antics.

4. Freedom Cactus

5. Plane Excited

6. Escape from Beyond the Cosmic

Shorts

Have a Ball

Percy pretends that Gilben has a soul.

Beauford T. Pusser

Ms. Baker's cat escapes and ruins the lives of her classmates

Big Boy

Clarence joins NAMBLA.

No, that's what actually happens. He tries to find out what "mature" people do but just makes an ass of himself like always.