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Fishtank: Difference between revisions

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imported>Dixie
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==Meet the Losers, er, Contestants==
==Meet the Losers, er, Contestants==
{{center|[[File:Fishtank - meet the contestants - da7.jpg|445px]]}}
{{center|[[File:Fishtank - meet the contestants - da7.jpg|445px]]}}
* '''[[Asperger's Syndrome|Jonathan]]''' &ndash; [[Faggot|Outspoken]] lisping [[Christian|christfag]] with [[Chris-chan|aspergers]] and a desire to start a modeling career despite looking like [[13-year-old boy|your little brother with a goatee.]] Most frequently spotted habitually [[Internet Tough Guy|doing pushups]] and reading books (specifically [[Jesus|the Bible]]) to try and appear intelligent. His being on [[Autism|the spectrum]] is <strike>usually </strike>never ignored by the other contestants as he is the only one who will try to hold conversations or actually do anything. Was [[Banned|kicked off]] [[And nothing of value was lost|early]] because it was quickly starting to become the Jonathan show where he endorses [[Andrew Tate]] and insists [[Hitler did nothing wrong]]. <strike>Not interesting outside of Fishtank</strike> [[Shit no one cares about|Nobody here is interesting.]]
* '''[[China|Simmons]]''' &ndash; [[I'm so random|Eccentric]] [[unfunny]] [[pedophile]] which is probably why [[Sam Hyde|Sam]] resented him specifically. Was [[Banned|kicked off]] the show first because [[self-pwn|he wrote a]] [[Paladin-Press|book]] about how to [[Discord|groom children]] at summer camp or something, which makes sense as he often [[transgender|troons]] out and [[I'm so random|wears womens' clothes.]] Anything else he may have done was overshadowed by this because the crew were desperate for something interesting to happen. Was most often seen trying to [[gay|tug]] [[gay|Jonathan's]] [[gay|dick]] out of his pants or [[Africa|stealing things]] to start arguments. Trolled Sam enough to get [[Banned|kicked off]] and got every other contestant [[Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder|a 24 hour break with pizza]] and [[Lel|nonalcoholic beer.]]
* '''[[Retard|Josie]]''' &ndash; [[Guro|Clinically autistic]] [[wapanese|kuudere]] of the house. [[Ceiling cat|Patiently observed]] the chaos. Was probably brought in because her [[High_Functioning_Autism|fidgeting]] is annoying but this backfired as she [[Die alone|kept to herself]] and [[basement-dweller|viewers]] would sit and stare at her tics for hours. Most often seen [[Masturbation|watching]] [[Transgender|Simmons]] [[mantrain|molest]] [[Incel|Jon]] or [[ROFLCOPTER|spinning in place.]] Half of the internet believes she is a [[Flat-chan|tranny]]. For [[Jew|$500]] you can buy her a [[plushie|plush toy.]] [[Do not feed the trolls|Immune to pretty much everything that went on]] because she was constantly [[Terri Schiavo|ignoring her surroundings]] when not directly spoken to. Won [[the game]] by [[unfunny|doing nothing.]]
* '''[[Pokemon|Mauro]]''' &ndash; [[Fat|Morbidly-obese]] [[NORP|normalfag.]] [[No friends|Had no niche whatsoever]] and [[Shit no one cares about|nobody cared he existed.]] Referred to as Snorlax because he [[G2g i need sleep|slept]] 15 hours a day. [[And nothing of value was lost|Lost]] [[the game]] by [[unfunny|doing nothing.]]
* '''[[Whore|Letty]]''' &ndash; [[Do not want|Disgusting]] [[Hotard|e-thot]]. Would have been totally forgotten about except her [[pr0n|pics]] were leaked by a [[revenge porn|vengeful ex]]. Anything she did on the show (not that it was very much despite making it to 2nd place) is [[Drama whore|overshadowed]] by [[Asking for it|teh nudez]]. Most notable [[lie|achievements]] were [[fail|failing]] to be more appealing than a [[retard]] who [[Sonic the Hedgehog|compulsively spins in circles]] and [[fail|not succeeding]] in turning [[Faggot|Jon]] away from his [[BFF]] [[Jesus|Jesus Christ.]] Later [[Oh god what have I done?|regretted]] her decision to be on Fishtank and decided her time on the show was actually [[cyberrape|rape.]] Probably [[And nothing of value was lost|lost]] Fishtank because [[pedophile|Sam]] realized he didn't want to fuck her.
* '''[[Too cool for the Internet|Vance]]''' &ndash; [[You|Failed]] [[USI|normalfag]] who [[lie|claims]] to be a method actor yet [[Anti-lulz|can't be entertaining]] to save his life. Most often seen being [[mock|mocked]] by [[cybersex|TTS]] because he's an [[White Devils|acceptable target]] and even [[Kiwi Farms|random internet speds]] are [[lie|funnier]] than him. [[Doing it wrong|Constantly failed]] to get [[Lolcow|Letty's]] attention (who he clearly [[Lonely|wanted to fuck]]) with [[Christian|Jon]] [[socializing|rebounding]], which would almost be impressive if [[buttsecks|the prize]] wasn't [[SPH|Letty.]] [[Trying too hard|Tried]] to salvage his place on the show by [[lie|pretending]] to be [[retard|insane]] but was too much of a pussy to make it funny. [[And nothing of value was lost|His time on the show is characterized by failed gimmicks that fell flat on their face until he was unceremoniously voted off.]]
* '''[[Scene|Sylvia]]''' &ndash; [[Fat]] [[fugly|ugly]] [[pig]] who tries to hide her excess [[fat]] pounds beneath pounds of [[lie|makeup.]] Looks 45 despite being 23. [[Moderator|Wet blanket]] who [[skank|nobody liked]] in or outside of the Fishtank. Single-handedly convinced the show's producers to water down the TTS feature because every second message was telling Sylvia to lose weight. Also had her nudes leaked but nobody ever saw them because the words "[[The Blue Waffle|Sylvia's nudes]]" are too horrific. A sad blubbery character with no appeal to anyone. Tried to make friends, failed and then [[Victim complex|whined on Twitter]] about how Fishtank didn't [[attention whore|increase her]] [[Onlyfans]] subscribers.
* '''[[No one likes you|Damiel]]''' &ndash; Nobody remembers who this is.


==Gallery==
==Gallery==

Revision as of 18:20, 28 October 2023

Fishtank, also called Fishtank Live was an interwebz-hosted "reality show"/"game show" founded in 2023 by Americunt comedy hack (and notorious terrorist) Sam Hyde, er, "Jason Goldstriker". The basis of the show was the dream of every OG-style internet troll and lolcow enthusiast: Get a bunch of autists together IRL in a house, remove their phones, and force them to compete in depraved challenges for "money", while people online watch the lulz ensue. The initial prize offered to the unlucky "winner" was a mere $10,000.00 of 'Murican money which isn't really that much - but it was eventually upped to $30K USD. This shitshow lasted for just a bit under two months in 2023 before ending its first season.

Meet the Losers, er, Contestants


  • SylviaFat ugly pig who tries to hide her excess fat pounds beneath pounds of makeup. Looks 45 despite being 23. Wet blanket who nobody liked in or outside of the Fishtank. Single-handedly convinced the show's producers to water down the TTS feature because every second message was telling Sylvia to lose weight. Also had her nudes leaked but nobody ever saw them because the words "Sylvia's nudes" are too horrific. A sad blubbery character with no appeal to anyone. Tried to make friends, failed and then whined on Twitter about how Fishtank didn't increase her Onlyfans subscribers.
  • Damiel – Nobody remembers who this is.

Gallery

Videos

See Also

External Links

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