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MUMPS: Difference between revisions
imported>Bugbear →External links: added a link to the FAQ |
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The '''Massachusetts General Hospital Utility Multi-Programming System''', abbreviated as '''MUMPS''' or just '''M''', is a programming language that is absolutely [[Special|unique]] in its [[Shit|shittiness]]. Unfortunately, although it's constructed as one of those shit esoteric languages like Brainfuck or Befunge, people actually use it. | The '''Massachusetts General Hospital Utility Multi-Programming System''', abbreviated as '''MUMPS''' or just '''M''', is a programming language that is absolutely [[Special|unique]] in its [[Shit|shittiness]]. Unfortunately, although it's constructed as one of those shit esoteric languages like [[Brainfuck]] or Befunge, people actually use it. | ||
{{quote|M is a lousy language with one great data type.|Steve J. Morris, as quoted in the [http://www.faqs.org/faqs/m-technology-faq/part1/ MUMPS FAQ, part 1]}} | |||
The data type he's talking about is the string, which is the ONLY data type in MUMPS. That's right: strings are implicitly converted into numbers while performing mathematical operations. | |||
{{quote|The primary design goal MUMPS was to create code that, once written, can never be maintained by anyone ever again. [...] A more apt name for the language certainly would have been EXPLOSIVE-DIARRHEA.|Alex Papadimoulis, writing for [http://thedailywtf.com/Articles/A_Case_of_the_MUMPS.aspx The Daily WTF]}} | |||
== Code samples == | == Code samples == | ||
The Hello World program looks like this: | |||
<pre style="margin-right:190px;"> | |||
hello() | |||
write "Hello, World!",! | |||
quit | |||
</pre> | |||
As TOW explains, the <code>,!</code> part creates a newline for reasons that are [[WTF|totally obvious]]. The <code>quit</code> part is necessary because the MUMPS compiler doesn't give a fuck about whether or not you want a routine to end. This is also painfully apparent in the very short routine size limit. | |||
Alternative version: | |||
<pre style="margin-right:190px;"> | |||
hello() w "Hello, World!",! q | |||
</pre> | |||
This last program takes advantage of the fact that you can abbreviate keywords like <code>if</code> in one letter, like <code>i</code>. So does this one, which prints out a beautifully formatted table of prime numbers: | |||
<pre style="margin-right:190px;"> | <pre style="margin-right:190px;"> | ||
f p=2,3:2 s q=1 x "f f=3:2 q:f*f>p!'q s q=p#f" w:q p,?$x\8+1*8 | f p=2,3:2 s q=1 x "f f=3:2 q:f*f>p!'q s q=p#f" w:q p,?$x\8+1*8 | ||
</pre> | </pre> | ||
== External links == | == External links == | ||
Revision as of 21:22, 28 August 2014
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Page currently under construction. Don't tag as shit, please. |
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MUMPS is part of a series on Programming. [Enter the Matrix] |
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ADA • Assembly • C • C++ • COBOL • Debug • DOS • Erlang • Error • Fdisk • Fortran • Integer • Java • LOLCode • Machine Code • Matlab • MIRC Script • MUMPS • Open Source • Perl • PHP • Programming language • Python • QBASIC • Ruby on Rails • Scratch • SSH • Visual Basic
Firefox XPS IRC Attack • Safari XPS Attack • Sandworm
Bill Gates • Linus Torvalds • Weev • Goatse Security • Terry Davis • Theo de Raadt
Operating system • Warez • Notepad • Is not a bug, it's a feature • Database Error | |
The Massachusetts General Hospital Utility Multi-Programming System, abbreviated as MUMPS or just M, is a programming language that is absolutely unique in its shittiness. Unfortunately, although it's constructed as one of those shit esoteric languages like Brainfuck or Befunge, people actually use it.
—Steve J. Morris, as quoted in the MUMPS FAQ, part 1 | ||
The data type he's talking about is the string, which is the ONLY data type in MUMPS. That's right: strings are implicitly converted into numbers while performing mathematical operations.
—Alex Papadimoulis, writing for The Daily WTF | ||
Code samples
The Hello World program looks like this:
hello() write "Hello, World!",! quit
As TOW explains, the ,! part creates a newline for reasons that are totally obvious. The quit part is necessary because the MUMPS compiler doesn't give a fuck about whether or not you want a routine to end. This is also painfully apparent in the very short routine size limit.
Alternative version:
hello() w "Hello, World!",! q
This last program takes advantage of the fact that you can abbreviate keywords like if in one letter, like i. So does this one, which prints out a beautifully formatted table of prime numbers:
f p=2,3:2 s q=1 x "f f=3:2 q:f*f>p!'q s q=p#f" w:q p,?$x\8+1*8
External links
Category:Programming Category:Softwarez Category:Internets Phenomena