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Comic: Difference between revisions
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==Superhero comics== | ==Superhero comics== | ||
Superhero comics come in colorful shrink-wrapped books. Nobody knows what's actually inside these books, because taking off the shrinkwrap would destroy the collector value of the books. They are kept hidden away as saving bonds. | Superhero comics come in colorful shrink-wrapped books. Nobody knows what's actually inside these books, because taking off the shrinkwrap would destroy the collector value of the books. They are kept hidden away as saving bonds. [[Comic book fans]] are also worth mentioning, as they are likely the most easily offended kinds of nerd you can piss off with kicks by telling they that they're just American Weeaboo Comic nerds like their Nip worshipping counterparts, only with even less of a dick size and ego to spare. | ||
The only superhero worth taking the wrapper off his comic is Spider Jerusalem from ''Transmetropolitan'' because unlike most other superheroes who spend the twenty-two papges (minus advertisements, those lazy bastards) flying around in homoerotic undergarments and saving people from [[asking for it|whatever they happened to be asking for at the time]], Jerusalem is seen throughout his comic chain-smoking, eating the eyes of endangered species as a snack, writing his [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|weekly newspaper column]] from the tops of strip clubs while [[otherkin|half-human aliens]] riot against the police below, doing drugs, [[win|making Catholic priests vomit for eavesdropping on him]], [[epic win|and shooting the President of the United States with his bowel disruptor]]. | The only superhero worth taking the wrapper off his comic is Spider Jerusalem from ''Transmetropolitan'' because unlike most other superheroes who spend the twenty-two papges (minus advertisements, those lazy bastards) flying around in homoerotic undergarments and saving people from [[asking for it|whatever they happened to be asking for at the time]], Jerusalem is seen throughout his comic chain-smoking, eating the eyes of endangered species as a snack, writing his [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|weekly newspaper column]] from the tops of strip clubs while [[otherkin|half-human aliens]] riot against the police below, doing drugs, [[win|making Catholic priests vomit for eavesdropping on him]], [[epic win|and shooting the President of the United States with his bowel disruptor]]. | ||
Revision as of 04:46, 26 July 2011
Literature for children and geeks. If you get stuck on the words, you can look at the pictures and they might help you know what's going on. If you're very lucky, there might even be pictures of tits.
Newspaper comics
Newspaper comics are the lowest form of comics, even in Bizarro World. Most of them are "funny", hence the term "funny pages." In fact, some are so funny that they're unfunny. Such is quantum physics. File:No exceptions.PNG Newspaper comics were born at least a hundred years ago to sell newspapers. Back then, most people couldn't read and written news was worthless to them. So publishers tried to make newspapers taste delicious. One day, while experimenting with flavored ink, a horrible mongoloid child was created. This child became "Yellow Boy", a delightful racist caricature who terrorized the country. Many other beady eyed creatures were begotting, most of them horribly un-PC. The people loved these colorful and tasty stories. But some time the magic died, and now the comics are just around to keep old people from complaining.
Superhero comics
Superhero comics come in colorful shrink-wrapped books. Nobody knows what's actually inside these books, because taking off the shrinkwrap would destroy the collector value of the books. They are kept hidden away as saving bonds. Comic book fans are also worth mentioning, as they are likely the most easily offended kinds of nerd you can piss off with kicks by telling they that they're just American Weeaboo Comic nerds like their Nip worshipping counterparts, only with even less of a dick size and ego to spare.
The only superhero worth taking the wrapper off his comic is Spider Jerusalem from Transmetropolitan because unlike most other superheroes who spend the twenty-two papges (minus advertisements, those lazy bastards) flying around in homoerotic undergarments and saving people from whatever they happened to be asking for at the time, Jerusalem is seen throughout his comic chain-smoking, eating the eyes of endangered species as a snack, writing his weekly newspaper column from the tops of strip clubs while half-human aliens riot against the police below, doing drugs, making Catholic priests vomit for eavesdropping on him, and shooting the President of the United States with his bowel disruptor.
Manga
Manga is for fucktarded weeaboos who spend all day inside fapping to Naruto. It features bad translation into English by the Chinese communists where they're mouths don't even correspond to the words, fucked up one-liners that 13 year old boys think are SUPAR KEWL and eyes that are big enough to be seen from space. The normal person who watches manga is a fat fuck with less friends then a /b/tard, which is almost impossible since /b/tards had no friends in the first place. Nerds think manga is ubar kewl and frequently wish that they were characters in a manga. They sometimes even dress up as manga characters, but most of them take to drawing really manga, posting it on DeviantART and then when people post comments saying how KAWAII ^__________^';! it is they believe that they are THE BEST and get plane tickets on the next flight to japan, believing that they can actually draw. There's also hentai, which is manga except with moar bewbs. It's slightly less retarded, as you get to laugh at how horrible the animation is and how easily that tiny moaning chick let herself get raped.
Internet comics
See webcomics.