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Revision as of 14:26, 28 August 2011
Dinosaurs have a lot more internet relevance than it seems, as they are involved with the two largest bases of fucktards on the internet - creationists and furries. Also occasionally known as "Drama-saurs", any mention of dinosaurs, accurate or inaccurate, will cause a shitstorm of drama by people who spend far too much time on the internet.
Dinosaurs are the official best thing ever.
Unpopular Science
Mentioning dinosaurs is a sure-fire way to get a rise from any creationist who will claim either:
- Dinosaurs existed for thousands, not millions of years.
- The word "Dragon" in the Bible actually means "Dinosaur", which means dinosaurs and humans lived at the same time.
- Dinosaurs did not exist. Ever. They are hoaxes made up be evil scientists who want to destroy religion.
- Others think that dinosaur fossils are actually the bones of dragons, re-arranged by Satan and his minions to make Christians doubt the Bible.
- Dinosaur bones were put by God just for a couple lulz.
It should be noted however that not all faith-heads automatically reject the idea of dinosaurs, as is the case of Raptor Jesus, who is worshiped by millions.
Evolution
Most dinosaurs became either reptiles(no retard) or birds. This is what most people think. As it turns out, dinosaurs are even more distantly related from humans than previously thought.
Before they evolved into apes, niggers were originally dinosaurs. Specialized bones - noticeably the enormous lips - were found in Africa. Scientists refer to it as a giant lawnmower. Its diet is unknown, although judging by it's descendants it's an easy guess.
The idea that humans are directly descended from dinosaurs should not be confused with Reptoids, which are lizards which came from outer space and take on the form of humans in order to take over the world. Strangely, the humans they chose to resemble are usually white people, not niggers.
How the Dinosaurs Became Extinct
Most scientists believeIt was once widely believed that a giant meteorite caused the extinction of the dinosaurs, blocking out the sun, causing the next ice age, and ultimately killing all the cold-blooded animals, but anyone that still believes this is a fucktard. Others believe it was an ancient form of global warming. Some think it was God.
How the dinosaurs became extinct has been debated by scientists for years. Few other people care.
Scalies
Scalies are furries who have fursonas of reptiles instead of cute fuzzy animals. They are fiercely defensive of their names, as they have scales, not fur. Such insignificant details should not be noted, as they are all still scumbags and no closer to Raptor Jesus than other furries.
Favorite sexual deviancy among scalies include egg-shitting in a permanent orgasmic state akin to shit art and wrapping their forked tongues around throbbing lizard cock. Many lizards and reptiles however do not have cocks but a single hole known as a cloaca - where shit, urine and cum all squirt out, which probably enhances the flavor.
Most scalies are either dinosaurs or dragons. The dinosaur of choice is always a raptor. Not a Stegosaurus with a brain the size of a walnut or a hideous egg-eater. It's always a raptor. This serves only as further blasphemy. The reason behind always choosing a raptor is that scalies also have a pawfur, vore, and guro fetish and enjoy ripping their partners apart with their feet and eating them.
Actually, since birds are said to be the dinosaurs' closest living relatives, the dino-furries should be classified amongst ANOTHER subgroup: the "Avians".
Spinosaurus & Giganotosaurus
One of the lesser known internet relevances dinosaurs have. Two of the most infamous dinosaurs of OUR time. They have been known to cause massive amounts of bawwing and drama. How is this possible? With the powers of JurASSic Park and Dino Crisis 2. Most of this drama can actually turn into fucking flamewars. Most of the drama happens on Youtube.
Trust me, go onto any video about Jurassic Park or Dino Crisis 2, you'll find someone bitching.
Why are all the fags whining?
Apparently, all of this is genereated from the fact that Spinosaurus/Giganotosaurus can kill T. Rex in a fight.
Of course, most of these intellectual people don't realize they're a bunch of retards.
Here are some facts help you be moar smart:
- Spinosaurus, though bigger than T. Rex, was primarily a fish eater. Its teeth and narrow jaws were for spearing fast-moving fish - useless for fighting an animal of T. Rex's size.
- T. Rex had teeth the size of bananas.
- T. Rex was better than you.
So, if you see anyone say "spino culd pwn T _Rex asS", they're most likely a a newfag, and you should begin the obvious.
Philosoraptor
Central tenet
Philosoraptor's Theory of Dinosaurs asserts that non-material abstract (but substantial) forms (or ideas) (Creationism), and not the material world of change known to us through Scientology, possess the highest and most fundamental kind of reality. Or in layman's terms - did dinosaurs eat Baby Jesus?
Not central tenet
Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?
We Covet a Thoughtful Dinosaur[1]
Dinosaur controversies[2]
- Did Dinosaurs Have Arthritis?
- What "Warm-Blooded" Really Means?
- Brontosaurus vs. Apatosaurus
- Cats vs. Dinosaurs
Dinosexx0r
Dinosaur pornography is remarkably popular on the internet, but what isn't?
External Links
- Russian Philosoraptor - nobody cares, but Philosoraptor is a symbol of dinopedia
- The Creation Evidence Museum's FAQ telling us that dinosaurs are, in fact, in the Bible.
- Strange procreation habits of the dinosaurs
- Wrong DinoSaur
- JURASSIC NIGGAS
See Also
Featured article October 3, 2005 | ||
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Dinosaur | Succeeded by Lincoln Continental |