Fit/: Difference between revisions

Revision as of 08:02, 5 March 2017

/fit/ is the 4chan ~~health and~~ fitness board, and is a prime example of how 4chan can ruin a good idea. The rest of 4chan might be filled with weeaboos, pedos, homos, psychos, weirdos, failtrolls, emos, necros, aspies, furries, jews, and niggers, Mexicans and Chinese but at one point /fit/ eclipsed all in terms of worthlessness and failure. Some day internet historians will look at this board and be in awe that something with such potential could be ruined so quickly, only to return as a shadow of its former self. Aside from regularly failing to fulfill its intended purpose (convincing typical fatass basement dwellers to get into shape), it is also nearly the only board on 4chan to fail to regularly generate memes.

Holy goddamn fuck, was it always like this?

The simple answer to this question is that no, it was not always like this. When moot first stood /fit/ up it was a whole new world filled with hope and promise, inhabited by vagrants (mostly from /ck/ and /k/) who had stumbled across what seemed to be verdant fields of green filled with natives to rape and exploit for ruthlessly commercial purposes. The first three days consisted of fitness interested chantards optimistically discussing such important things as diet and rep brackets for weightlifting. Most of the early adopters had at least a passing knowledge of the subject they were discussing, and a large number were cognizant of powerlifting and the sport of olympic weightlifting as well as High Intensity Interval Training and the Golden Age of Bodybuilding. After about three days the board even began to develop it's own memes, unaware at the time that one such meme would later grow to destroy them. But more on this later. The early memes of /fit/ consisted of pictures of eight-times Mr Olympia Ronnie Coleman, Public Enemy's Bring the Noise rewritten to become Bring the Squats, Electric Six's Dance Commander rewritten as Squat Commander and numerous others that are now lost in the bitter-tasting sands of time. It was about this time that the infamous OATZ!, SQUATZ! was born, carrying in it the power to destroy /fit/ forever.

OATZ! SQUATZ!

Soon /fit/'s three days of grace were over, and a steady trickle of rotten filth began to seep out of the dirty black rubbish bag in which the rest of 4chan's dismembered corpse was slowly decomposing. At the time, the original dwellers of /fit/ (the founding fathers, if you would) were little concerned, as finally they had found kindred spirits in the barren Internet waste with who they could exchange ideas and play light-hearted, good-natured trolls on, to everyones mutual amusement and approval. This insidious filth first took the form of fat, worthless bastards asking the same fucking question again and again: "HAY /FIT/ HOW DOEZ I LOSE WEIGHTZ!!?". In order to spend as little time as possible on these wastes of space who certainly would be too lazy to follow through with more effective advice, the original inhabitants of the board began using the simple, throw-away tip of "eat oats and do squats". For fat fucks this was good, simple advice. While oats are not an especially great food source, they're a fairly good source of fiber and other nutrients, and in general make a worthwhile addition to the diet of your average American twinkie-eating fucktard. Squats are an extremely efficient strength building exercise and strengthening the legs has secondary cardio-vascular benefits, as the quadriceps assist the heart in pumping blood through the body and are more often than not ignored in the routines of many young men. Unfortunately, the new migrants began taking this advice far too seriously. Instead of a starting point for dietary changes, oats became an absolute cornerstone, an indispensable and unyielding Rock of Ages on which to base all other constructions, with their actual nutritional value becoming completely over-estimated and exaggerated. Squats became the be-all and end-all of any fitness routine. With rapacious rapidity 'Eat oats and do squats' became OATZ! SQUATZ!, repeated ad nauseum like Seig Heil! in Swedish gaybars, by people with even less fitness knowledge than /b/ has good parenting skills. The end had begun. As of this moment it still hasn't finished, which indicates how fucking useless /fit/ actually is. Honestly you cunts finish what you started already.

/fit/ Today

For what felt like a century, /fit/ was seen as a tremendously worthless pile of shit. Between having a feud with /fa/ and dishing out obvious advice to newfags too stupid to use Google, it looked like /fit/ would get the ax at any moment. Recently, however, moot decided to do something beneficial for once and appointed mods and janitors who actually do their fucking jobs. A sticky was made which contains general fitness knowledge along with anon's daily recommended dose of banhammer should they ignore it and ask stupid questions.

Not all is perfect in /fit/, though. The board still produces less memes or OC than any other board with their only "noteworthy" one being Alpha as Fuck. /fit/izens also have developed an unhealthy obsession with various bodybuilders and models such as Zyzz, justifying their views with the quip no homo.

However, the tides began to turn in January of 2012. Many of the fatasfatasses who were ruining /fit/ had actually began taking the advice they were receiving to heart and, in something we'd expect from the corniest of happy endings, actually got in shape. This led to an increase in Progress threads, where the transformation could be seen quite readily. The benefit of this massive turnaround was the overwhelming resentment that the ex fatties had toward the lazy, "I'm too tired to work out" fatasses. This also led to an explosion in new memes, such as Fat People Stories, motivation threads, Betas gonna Bet (and lose), and better quality advice more in-tune with the board's original message. Last Thursday, /fit/ has had a number of posters flock in from /sp/, seeking refuge from the latter's massive influx of Redditfags, making /fit/ more "normal" and less aspie boards on 4chan. Suffice it to say, /fit/ is ~~definitely heading in the right direction and is turning out to be a thriving self-contained ecosystem~~ just going to turn back into shit in a matter of time.

The Trip Situation

/fit/ is home to several notorious Tripcode users. Usually, they range from retarded to shit, with very few exceptions. Bellow follows a list showcasing some of the most notorious /fit/ tripfags.

Zyzz

Zyzz was an 18 year old kid who was only 130 lbs. He decided to work out but his diet and routine sucked so much he became bitter and impatient. He decided to start running gear. After a cycle or two he looked great. The only problem was as soon as he got off the gear, he would start losing mass and that cut look so he opted to start being on gear all the time (at unsafe dosages, mind you) along with T3 and clenbuterol. It wasn't enough, he had veneers put in, a nose job and jaw work done because he was so insecure. After he became a self proclaimed God, he said he looked the way he did because of genetics. Got caught when someone posted a picture of him getting a shot in his butt.

One day he went to Thailand and died in the sauna of a Bangkok whorehouse with lots of Tren, Test, Clen, t3, and drugs in his system. He was a vain piece of shit with no respect for hormones and chemicals and it is why he died.

His fan base happens to be some of the most pathetic fucking pieces of shit to ever come into existence. They live their life through Zyzz because they don't love themselves and they try to emulate him. They are like fucking parrots and will jump to defend Zyzz any chance they get.

Jeff Seid

A 20 year old douchebag with a face that screams 'giant douche' and has the social media personality of a 14 year old girl. Got a body which is only attainable through years of hard work or chemical assistance - Being that young, years of hard work are out of the question. BB.com always bag him out because he bragged about injecting slin all the time, before his posts mysteriously disappeared and he became a 'natural bodybuilder'. His posts on said forum scream giant douche, his wannabe Zyzz videos scream giant douche, his denial of steroids after posting about taking them multiple times scream giant douche, and taking steroids from a young age scream giant douche. Everyone on /fit/ wants him to go.

Scooby

A 50-something year old faggot who used to browse /fit/ while taking steroids and simultaneously trying to give people health & fitness advice, which are topics he knows shit about. Being a beta nerd that took forever to get big and strong, he believes himself to be the ultimate know-it-all of fitness. Reacts like a bitch to any critique by releasing "funny" and provocative videos mocking his haters while at the same time disabling all comments forever. Got BTFO and doxed for being a complete cunt and quit for a while like the spineless faggot he is.

Ennui

Depressive teacher, and admitted roid monkey. Occasionally found on /fit/ ALL THE FUCKING TIME ON EVERY FUCKING DAY. His signature posting is to accuse that everything and anything that looks remotely better than him (i.e everyone that actually spends time in a fucking gym) is on absurd-stupid-pointless-huge-enough-to-kill-an-army-of-elephants amounts of steroids ( despiste telling everyone he's also a user), namely, stuff as 10 grams of Testosterone, 10 grams of Trenbolone and assorted anabolics, 100 IU HGH and 200 IU Insulin. He also likes to call people average and say they don't train as hard as him. Even to he is a self-proclaimed genius, people of /fit/ will furiously masturbate over his pictures.

SuperMutant/Rich Piana

Appeared on /fit/ in early 2011, after some random dick made a callout thread saying nobody had a better back musculature than him. SuperMutant, originally anonymous, made a reply posting a picture of his humongous back. Ever since hangs around /fit/ after over 9000 /fit/ users furiously asked him to with the power of a thousand suns. He is actually the only person in /fit/ that actually lifts and actually gives good advice. However, SuperMutant clearly states he is very annoyed with /fit/ and constantly states the general homosexual behavior of /fit/ scares him. Whenever he stops posting, someone will make a thread crying for him to come back, which usually results in thousands of his pictures being dumped and furiously fapped to. More than once had his trip stolen for some reason. Which brings to the question that maybe the current user of the trip doesn't have anything to do with the original poster and is just trolling /fit/ for the lulz.

Recently /fit/holes have focused their efforts on finding out his identity, which probably scared away SuperMutant once and for all. After lengthy investigation, it was discovered that SuperMutant is in fact, IFBB Professional Bodybuilder Rich Piana, based on the simple fact that "SuperMutant" is the guy's stage and TV name for crying out loud.

His signature move is to tell people not to use steroids, even tho he uses large dosages of steroids himself.

TinyTrip

Cancerous Emo kid who tried to kill himself more than once and posted it on /fit/ for attention. Generally found in /fit/ every minute of every goddamn day, usually making a thread about himself. He had to use steroids to get an absolutely average physique, probably to make up for being a manlet.

Doesn't does shit besides attention whore and call out people bigger than him.

Just Your Average /fit/izen videos

/fit/, Weeaboo Edition

Based Tyrone takes on /fit/

Previous Video | Next Video

	“	Do you even lift?	„

The Images of /fit/

/fit/ in a nutshell About missing Pics

/fit/ approved.
All you need to plan a workout.
FRANK ZANE IS A LION GET IN THE CAR
/fit/ likes to multi-task.

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No explanation needed.
SQUATZ DESTROY ZOMBIES!
Hmmm, oatz.
Jews on /fit/.
What the fuck Edward Norton
Come and rock me, Amadeus.
The one meme to end them all.
A /fit/izen goes to gym as part of N.Y. resolution of 2013
A /fit/izen goes to gym as part of N.Y. resolution of 2014
A /fit/izen goes to gym as part of N.Y. resolution of 2015, ft. the classic lat-pull down video
What /fit/ users are compensating for.

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