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imported>Crossbow
Created page with "<!-- DO NOT REMOVE THIS TEMPLATE--> {{UserSandbox}} <!-- EDIT BELOW HERE YOU FUCKING NIGGER(S)-->{{Offended}} {{Quote|Hi, my name is Anon and I think the holocaust never happe..."
 
imported>Crossbow
 
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<!-- DO NOT REMOVE THIS TEMPLATE-->
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{{UserSandbox}}
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{{Quote|Hi, my name is Anon and I think the holocaust never happened. Feminism is the cause of the decline of the west, which acts as a scapegoat for mass immigration and the root of all these problems is the Jew. Would you like to be friends?|Stephan to the livestream before failing at EVERYTHING, nobody wants to be friends with you, [[RETARD]].}}


{{ib|[[File:AnonBalliet.mp4|250px]]}}
= 1 =
{{Ibhead|<big>'''Stephan Balliet'''</big>}}
<table class="wikitable" style="margin:.1em 1em .1em 0;">
{{Ibrow|'''Nationality:'''|[[Germany|Kraut]] &nbsp;&nbsp;[[File:MiniflagGermany.png]]}}
<tr>
{{Ibrow|'''[[high score|Highscore]]'''|2 killed, 2 injured}}
<th colspan="2" style="background:#abf;">Contributions</th>
{{Ibrow|'''Top 50?'''|[[Nope]].}}
</tr>
{{Ibrow|'''Style'''|Single player}}
<tr>
{{Ibrow|'''[[An Hero]]?'''|No, [[v&]]}}
<th style="background:#abf;">Created</th>
{{Ibend}}<!--
<td style="background:#eee;">[[Laaiti Ekenstéen]] ('''[[AOTN]]''') &bull; [[Rina Palenkova]] ('''[[AOTN]]''', '''[[GNA]]''') &bull; [[Aaron Bushnell]] ('''[[AOTN]]''', '''[[GNA]]''') &bull; [[American Airlines Flight 63]] ('''[[GNA]]''')
-->
</tr>
2019, a few months after the epic crusade of [[Brenton Tarrant]],  <span class="blink" style="color:#f00;font-weight:bold;">A NEW CHALLENGER APPEARS</span> <sup></sup>: of ZE name '''Stephan "Door Cuck" Balliet'''{{Nazi}}, a round-headed Nazi weeaboo who on the Jewish holiday of Yom Kippur tried to get the [[High Score]] by shooting up his local [[ZOG]] (a synagogue) in Halle, Germany. Unlike most other Tarrant copycats, the retard actually managed to livestream his shooting, however, the audience of what was supposed to be a show of lulzy proportions were heavily disappointed as our little Saviour of the White Race failed to open the wooden door of the synagogue, killed one of his own people before driving to a Turkish kebab shop out of shame and killing a random customer using shitty 3D printed guns that barely worked before getting shot in the neck (which he survived) and v& by [[Police|Polizei]]. What a [[failure]]. Oh, did we mention he still lived with his [[Mother|Mutter]]? Lol.
<tr>
<th style="background:#abf;">Improved</th>
<td style="background:#eee;">[[Halle synagogue shooting]] (<s>'''[[Template:Crap|Crap]]'''</s>) &bull; [[Otoya Yamaguchi]] ('''[[AOTN]]''') &bull; [[Hugo Jackson]] &bull; [[John Earnest]] &bull; [[Ramadan Van Man]]
</tr>
</table>


== Backround ==
= 2 =
[[File:StephanBallietat12.jpg|200px|thumb|left|Stephan as a young kinder. You may think from the medal and certificate, that this kid is smart, not the case.]]
Before snapping, Stephan was just like any other [[manlet]], he had an unhealthy obsession with [[Anime|anime girls]] and was a true patriot to /a/. Apparently, he worked for the German Armed Forces, and there he was taught [[Guns|"how 2 gunz"]].


So what happened? What made this manlet snap? The simplest answer here is that he read a little too much Tarrant and wanted to be just like him. Unfortunately for him, krauts can't succeed in doing shit (except for that [[Adolf Hitler|one guy]]), and Stephan, [[Retardation|being cursed a Kraut at birth]], never got his plan of being an elite white nationalist race warrior to come to fruition.
[[file:GendronBitches.jpg|200px]]


Living in [[Germany|Krautland]], Stephan knew he couldn't get guns the easy way, so he concluded to make some 3D guns which are usually more reliable than you'd expect. But... the problem was not the guns but him, he was too retarded to assemble them properly, meaning that 80% of the time, his Jew Remover 9000 would jam and not fire. He posted his final manifesto, images and livestream linked to some random imageboard that nobody cared about called [[????|Meguca]], which was subsequently closed after his shitty "attack". (oh yeah he made some shitty bombs that would go on to do fuck all lol)
= 3 =


== Ze Manifesto ==
{{Userbox | border-c=#A3B0BF | border-s=1| id-c=#CEDFF2| id-s=12| id-fc=#000000| id-op=| info-c=#E6F1FF| info-s=8| info-fc=#000000| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[File:8chan logo.png|50px]]| info=This user is a [[8chan]] user.}}{{Userbox | border-c=#CCCCCC | border-s=1| id-c=#CCCCCC| id-s=12| id-fc=#000000| id-op=| info-c=#FCFCFC| info-s=8| info-fc=#000000| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[file:Colt45.jpg|50px]]| info=This user is an [[alcoholic]].}}
Since he's retarded and posted his manifesto on some imageboard nobody cared about and didn’t choose [[8chan]], parts of this manifesto was temporarily lost, however our top team of [[Expert|experts]] here at ED were able to find it!


'''WARNING: ITS EDGY AND CONTAINS ANIME''' (scroll to see the full docs)
{{Userbox | border-c=#77E0E8 | border-s=1| id-c=#77E0E8| id-s=12| id-fc=#000000| id-op=| info-c=#D0F8FF| info-s=8| info-fc=#000000| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[File:Ashbie fidgeting gif.gif|50px]]| info=This user has [[Assburgers Syndrome]].}}
<center><pdf width="500" height="300">File:DoKumentation.pdf</pdf></center>
<center><pdf width="500" height="300">File:READ THIS FIRST.pdf</pdf></center>
<center><pdf width="500" height="300">File:マニフェスト.pdf</pdf></center>


== Ze Shooting ==
{{Userbox | border-c=#F99C99 | border-s=1| id-c=#F99C99| id-s=12| id-fc=#000000| id-op=| info-c=#F9CBC9| info-s=8| info-fc=#000000| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[file:BannStar.PNG|50px]]| info=This user is a member of the <s>Hitler</s> [[Awesome|ED Youth]]}}
After "careful planning", On the 9th of October ([[Jews|Yom Kippur]] hahahaha!) our crusader posted his livestream link to that one imageboard in preperation for what would be the biggest fail to grace our eyes.


The livestream begins and we get a shot of his camera just pointing downwards to the crusty interior of his car, whilst he proceeds to do fucking nothing for 4 minutes until finally picking up the camera and introduces himself. He then proceeds to do fucking nothing for a little longer until finally beginning his journey to the local ZOG whilst blasting [[Mr. Bond]] through the radio.
{{Userbox | border-c=#000000 | border-s=1| id-c=#666666| id-s=12| id-fc=#FFFFFF| id-op=| info-c=#777777| info-s=8| info-fc=#FFFFFF| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[File:R u hardenuff.jpg|35px]]| info=This user is a [[badass]] who will [[lie|fuck your shit up]].}}


He arrives at the 'gogue and with his "guns" and attempts to open the wooden door before realizing its locked. He pushes, kicks and shoots the door whilst shouting "Fack!" and "Scheiße!" like a 12-year old losing at [[Counter-Strike]]. Realizing his physical strength is not a match for the wooden door, he whips out his shitty explosives and tries to bust it open, which doesn't work. Because Stephan is being loud as fuck, an old white German granny carrying a bottle of [[Mountain Dew]] ([[gamer]] approved!™) in her bag walks by and [[trolls]] him about the loud noise he is making, Stephan responds by fumbling with his shitty "gun" and shooting her which causes a bunch of dust to spew from the "gun". After trying the door again, he walks up to the granny's body and shoots it again for some fucking reason, wasting ammo and also shooting his own car tire in the process. LOL! Keep in mind, the jews inside of the synagogue are watching all this occur from the CCTV, probably [[Rofl|rofling]] at his incompetence.  
{{Userbox | border-c=#A3B0BF | border-s=1| id-c=#CEDFF2| id-s=12| id-fc=#000000| id-op=| info-c=#E6F1FF| info-s=8| info-fc=#000000| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[file:Mlptemplate.png|50px]]| info=This user is a [[brony]].}}


Stephan then stumbles around to a different pathway to the synagogue (which leads to MORE LOCKED DOORS LOL) before going back to the street and shooting the same wooden doors with his "shotgun" whichs fails again. A random car drives past which he shoots at for no fucking reason. Realizing he has been [[cucked]] by a wooden door, he drives away in shame to a Turkish kebab shop, he throws a shitty bomb into the shop which kills a random customer. He goes in and fails to shoot anybody as they all run into the backroom, he shoots a crying employee in the head which didn't even kill the guy. He leaves and gets into his car which he cant even drive cause of his fucked tire, gets shot in the neck by police, discards the camera on the side of the road, running for it before getting [[v&]]. He will forever be known as '''Door Cuck'''. What an absolute [[failure]].
{{Userbox | border-c=#00FF00 | border-s=1| id-c=#00FF00| id-s=12| id-fc=#000000| id-op=| info-c=#90FF90| info-s=8| info-fc=#000000| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[File:Btard template mongler.jpg|50px]]| info=This user is a [[b|/b/tard]].}}


== Loadout ==
{{Userbox | border-c=#C0C8FF | border-s=1| id-c=#C0C8FF| id-s=12| id-fc=#000000| id-op=| info-c=#F0F8FF| info-s=8| info-fc=#000000| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[File:ComicFightClub.jpg|50px]]| info=This user is a [[co|/co/mrade]].}}


{|class="wikitable" width="45%" style="text-align:left"
{{Userbox | border-c=#CCCC00 | border-s=1| id-c=#FFFF00| id-s=12| id-fc=#000000| id-op=| info-c=#FFFF99| info-s=8| info-fc=#000000| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[File:Rich Jerk.jpg|50px]]| info=This user has [[Encyclopedia Dramatica:Donate|donated]] to [[ED]].}}
!colspan="2"|Class Setup
|-<!-- DONGS NIGGA-->
!Item
!Accessories/Bonus
|-
|
*'''Primary''': 9mm Luty Submachine Gun
[[Image:GTA4IconsThompsonM1A1.png|center|140px]]
|
*Armed forces experience, sight, jams 80% of the time and DUST SPEWING TECHNOLOGY
|-
|
*'''Secondary''': 12-gauge Slam-Blast Shotgun
[[Image:GTA4Iconsaa12Shotgun.png|center|140px]]
|
*Jams slightly less and even more DUST SPEWING TECHNOLOGY
|-
|
*'''Perk 1''': Ghost Pro
[[Image:ATS_Ghost_Pro.png|center|70px]]
|
*Invisible against police helicopters. (Temporary)
|-
|
*'''Spell''': Nazi
<center>[[File:Swastika_Alpha.png|80px]]</center>
|*Double damage against Muslims, Americans, non-Aryans and Jews.
|}


== Graded Score ==
{{Userbox | border-c=#A3B0BF | border-s=1| id-c=#CEDFF2| id-s=12| id-fc=#000000| id-op=| info-c=#E6F1FF| info-s=8| info-fc=#000000| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[File:Chilljacob.png|50px]]| info=This user edited [[encyclopediadramatica.online]] and was a victim of [[Aediot]].}}
{| style="{{roundy|18px}}{{gradlinear|red|orange}}box-shadow:0 3px 6px gray;padding:1em;margin:0 auto 1em auto;" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="2" border="0"
|-
! colspan="2" style="{{roundy|9px}}background-color:red;box-shadow:0 3px 6px orange;" | <big>Graded score</big>
|-
| colspan="2" style="height:9px;overflow:hidden;" |
|-
! style="text-align:right;" | Kills:
|2/20 ''Two of his own people''
|-
! style="text-align:right;vertical-align:top;" | Accuracy:
|0/20 ''Too bad for his guns!'' <br />
|-
! style="text-align:right;" | Style:
|2/20 ''[[Brenton Tarrant]] wannabe and inspired [[Payton Gendron]] to stream it, got cucked by a door''
|-
! style="text-align:right;" | Butthurt:
|2.5/20 ''Basically forgotten in Germany and for some shit imageboard no one knows about.''
|-
! style="text-align:right;vertical-align:top;" | Bonus:
|12/20 ''Pulled a Breivik in court and tried to escape''<br />
|-
! colspan="2" style="{{roundy|9px}}background-color:orange;box-shadow:0 3px 6px yellow;" | <big>Total score: 19/100 ('''F''')</big>
|}


<center>'''DOOR CUCK'''</center>
{{Userbox | border-c=#000000 | border-s=1| id-c=#666666| id-s=12| id-fc=#FFFFFF| id-op=| info-c=#777777| info-s=8| info-fc=#FFFFFF| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[file:Holyshittrippinballsawesome.gif|50px]]| info=This user does [[drugs]].}}


<center>'''[[High Score| See full ranking]]'''</center>
{{Userbox | border-c=#F99C99 | border-s=1| id-c=#F99C99| id-s=12| id-fc=#000000| id-op=| info-c=#F9CBC9| info-s=8| info-fc=#000000| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[file:Rainbow flag.png|50px]]| info=This user is a [[gay|faggot]].}}


{{WantedLevel|level=custom|customstars=[[File:Wantedstar.png|40px|link=]] [[File:Wantedstar.png|40px|link=]] [[File:Wantedstar.png|40px|link=]]|custompic=[[File:BND Logo.svg.png|128px]]|customdesc=Bundesnachrichtendienst}}
{{Userbox | border-c=#AFA3BF | border-s=1| id-c=#DDCEF2| id-s=12| id-fc=#000000| id-op=| info-c=#F0E6FF| info-s=8| info-fc=#000000| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[File:Rule 30 Explained.jpg|50px]]| info=This user has [[GOTIS]].}}


== Aftermath ==
{{Userbox | border-c=#77E0E8 | border-s=1| id-c=#77E0E8| id-s=12| id-fc=#000000| id-op=| info-c=#D0F8FF| info-s=8| info-fc=#000000| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[file:Patchofurr.jpg|50px]]| info=This user is a [[furfag]].}}
[[File:BallietMugshot.jpg|200px|thumb|right|Balliet's mugshot. Notice the bandage on his neck from getting shot lol.]]
After a super long epic police chase, he got [[V&|epicly v&'d]] and was escorted to a POLIZI [[helicopter|choppa]]. 14 months later, he went to court and is now serving the life sentence for his two frags and [[Lies|"50" attempted murders]], the judge called this act a cowardly one.  


He tried to escape his medium security prison but got caught, which led to him being moved to a maximum security prison, which shows this guy will keep failing even in the doghouse. He also held 2 guards hostage once with a gun made out of ...paper? Don't ask how because we don't fucking know.  
{{Userbox | border-c=#F99C99 | border-s=1| id-c=#F99C99| id-s=12| id-fc=#000000| id-op=| info-c=#F9CBC9| info-s=8| info-fc=#000000| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[File:Gaia pixel boyfriend.png|40px]]| info=This user is a [[Gaiafag]].}}


This guy was an retard who used malfunctioning guns, made practically no plans beforehand and livestreamed his "attack" in attempt to be remembered, but now years after this ordeal (at the time of writing) nobody remembers him, except for retards like you and I, Stephan will now spend the rest of his life in a box, he ruined his life for practically nothing. '''ROT IN JAIL DOOR CUCK'''
{{Userbox | border-c=#C0C8FF | border-s=1| id-c=#C0C8FF| id-s=12| id-fc=#000000| id-op=| info-c=#F0F8FF| info-s=8| info-fc=#000000| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[file:CurburJuden.jpg|50px]]| info=This user [[Antisemitism|hates Jews]].}}


== Gallery ==
{{Userbox | border-c=#C0C8FF | border-s=1| id-c=#C0C8FF| id-s=12| id-fc=#000000| id-op=| info-c=#F0F8FF| info-s=8| info-fc=#000000| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[File:Nyan Commie Balloonist Animated.gif|25px]]| info=This user [[User:Hipcrime/Hipcrime Appreciation Station|appreciates Hipcrime]].}}
{{cg||1|center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:BallietArsenal.png|His accumulation of homemade guns (all shit)
Image:BallietDrip.jpeg|His drip
File:BallietMugshot.jpg|The retard's mugshot
</gallery>
|}}


{{Killers}}
{{Userbox | border-c=#F99C99 | border-s=1| id-c=#F99C99| id-s=12| id-fc=#000000| id-op=| info-c=#F9CBC9| info-s=8| info-fc=#000000| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[Image:Gavel.png|50px]]| info=This user has been to the [[internet jail]] and was [[buttraped]] there.}}
== See also ==
 
*[[White Nationalism]]
{{Userbox | border-c=#B7B7B7 | border-s=1| id-c=#B7B7B7| id-s=12| id-fc=#000000| id-op=| info-c=#E8E8E8| info-s=8| info-fc=#000000| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[File:ED IRC.JPG|50px]]| info=This user is in [[ED IRC|#ED]] on [[IRC]].}}
*[[Germany]] - Where he lives.
 
*[[Anders Behring Breivik]] - An inspiration and a much better example of a shooting.
{{Userbox | border-c=#77E0E8 | border-s=1| id-c=#77E0E8| id-s=12| id-fc=#000000| id-op=| info-c=#D0F8FF| info-s=8| info-fc=#000000| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[File:Macos.png|50px]]| info=This user uses [[Mac]].}}
*[[Brenton Tarrant]] - Also his inspiration.
 
*[[Patrick Crusius]] - Drunk guy who got a better high score.
{{Userbox | border-c=#CCCCCC | border-s=1| id-c=#CCCCCC| id-s=12| id-fc=#000000| id-op=| info-c=#FCFCFC| info-s=8| info-fc=#000000| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[file:Wanker.gif|50px]]| info=This user [[masturbates]] chronically.}}
*[[Philip Manshaus]] - Breivik’s failson who somehow did even worse than Doorcuck.
 
*[[John Earnest]] - Got a lower score, but somehow less embarrassing.
{{Userbox | border-c=#999999 | border-s=1| id-c=#DDDDDD| id-s=12| id-fc=#000000| id-op=| info-c=#EEEEEE| info-s=8| info-fc=#000000| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[file:Meatspin.gif|50px]]| info=This user has sat through '''{{#if:{{{2|}}}|[[{{{2}}}|{{{1}}}]]|{{{1}}}}}''' spins on [[Meatspin.com]].}}
*[[Payton Gendron]] - Stephan inspired this fedpost to stream his attack, and wrote his name on his guns.
 
*[[Alexandre Bissonnette]]
{{Userbox | border-c=#F99C99 | border-s=1| id-c=#F99C99| id-s=12| id-fc=#000000| id-op=| info-c=#F9CBC9| info-s=8| info-fc=#000000| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[File:Action hank vs pinky pie by junawashere-d4eq1he.gif|50px]]| info=This user hates [[My Little Pony]].}}
*[[William Atchison]] - Another failure who got cucked by an inanimate object.
 
*[[Robert Bowers]]
{{Userbox | border-c=#6EF7A7 | border-s=1| id-c=#6EF7A7| id-s=12| id-fc=#000000| id-op=| info-c=#C5FCDC| info-s=8| info-fc=#000000| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[file:Fatasssherrod.png|50px]]| info=This user is an [[oldfag]].}}
 
{{Userbox | border-c=#000000 | border-s=1| id-c=#666666| id-s=12| id-fc=#FFFFFF| id-op=| info-c=#777777| info-s=8| info-fc=#FFFFFF| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[File:Pedobear HD.png|25px]]| info=This user is a [[pedophile]].}}
 
{{Userbox | border-c=#F99C99 | border-s=1| id-c=#F99C99| id-s=12| id-fc=#000000| id-op=| info-c=#F9CBC9| info-s=8| info-fc=#000000| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[file:Redneck.png|35px]]| info=This user is a [[redneck]].}}
 
{{Userbox | border-c=#000000 | border-s=1| id-c=#666666| id-s=12| id-fc=#FFFFFF| id-op=| info-c=#777777| info-s=8| info-fc=#FFFFFF| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[File:White knighta.jpg|50px]]| info=This user is an [[internet tough guy]].}}
 
{{Userbox | border-c=#999999 | border-s=1| id-c=#DDDDDD| id-s=12| id-fc=#000000| id-op=| info-c=#EEEEEE| info-s=8| info-fc=#000000| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[file:Bouncywikilogo9.gif|50px]]| info=This user is a [[Wikipedo]].}}
 
{{Userbox | border-c=#A3B0BF | border-s=1| id-c=#CEDFF2| id-s=12| id-fc=#000000| id-op=| info-c=#E6F1FF| info-s=8| info-fc=#000000| info-lh=1.2em| info-op=| id=[[File:Jew recation image.jpg|50px]]| info=This user is [[Jewish]].}}

Latest revision as of 23:46, 1 April 2024

Hello there, Crossbow. Welcome to your Sandbox!

The sandbox is a great place for You to practice and improve your wiki markup and general editing skills.

Please take note anyone can still edit your Sandbox. You shouldn't worry that much about that and on the bright side, it encourages collaboration and improvement.

  • If you accidentally deleted what you worked on, do not worry! Check your page history in order to retrieve your previous work!
  • You may do whatever you want here, but do not turn this page into a redirect or remove this template, it would be counterintuitive.
  • To Admins/EDitors: This page should not be locked at any time.
Edit/rewrite the sandbox


1

Contributions
Created Laaiti Ekenstéen (AOTN) • Rina Palenkova (AOTN, GNA) • Aaron Bushnell (AOTN, GNA) • American Airlines Flight 63 (GNA)
Improved Halle synagogue shooting (Crap) • Otoya Yamaguchi (AOTN) • Hugo Jackson • John Earnest • Ramadan Van Man

2

3

This user is a 8chan user.
This user is an alcoholic.


This user has Assburgers Syndrome.


This user is a member of the Hitler ED Youth


This user is a badass who will fuck your shit up.


This user is a brony.


This user is a /b/tard.


This user is a /co/mrade.


This user has donated to ED.


This user edited encyclopediadramatica.online and was a victim of Aediot.


This user does drugs.


This user is a faggot.


This user has GOTIS.


This user is a furfag.


This user is a Gaiafag.


This user hates Jews.


This user appreciates Hipcrime.


This user has been to the internet jail and was buttraped there.


This user is in #ED on IRC.


This user uses Mac.


This user masturbates chronically.


This user has sat through {{{1}}} spins on Meatspin.com.


This user hates My Little Pony.


This user is an oldfag.


This user is a pedophile.


This user is a redneck.


This user is an internet tough guy.


This user is a Wikipedo.


This user is Jewish.
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