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Boxxmom: Difference between revisions

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'''Enter 2010...'''
'''Enter 2010...'''


The world is a cold, cold, place as Boxxy graduates high school and fills her head with big dreams of [[New York City]] and [[Gay|Broadway]]. While her [[fat]] mother ([[Powerword]]: Lisa Wayne) was way too [[jewish|cheap]] to invest in own her daughter's future and too busy crying over being dumped by Boxxdad, the dollar signs grew in her eyes as she hatched a [[Bailout Plan|fail proof plan]] to bring in enough [[jewgolds]] for the Wayne family to live comfortably [[at least 100|for years to come]].
The world is a cold, cold, place as Boxxy graduates high school and fills her head with big dreams of [[New York City]] and [[Gay|Broadway]]. While her [[fat]] mother ([[Powerword]]: Lisa Wayne) was way too [[jewish|cheap]] to invest in own her daughter's future and too busy crying over being dumped by Boxxdad, the dollar signs grew in her eyes as she hatched a [[Bailout Plan|fail proof plan]] to bring in enough [[jewgolds]] for the Wayne family to live comfortably for years to come.


1. [[JonBenet Ramsey|Force your daughter into the spotlight.]]
1. [[JonBenet Ramsey|Force your daughter into the spotlight.]]
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5. [[USI|Create your own YouTube channel]], upload a few videos of [[Boxxy]] opening her birthday presents, and [[PROFIT|earn a YouTube partnership]]
5. [[USI|Create your own YouTube channel]], upload a few videos of [[Boxxy]] opening her birthday presents, and [[PROFIT|earn a YouTube partnership]]
<br>
<br>
6. Pretend to be BFFs with your daughters' most prominent [[stalkers|fans]] on [[Twitter]] while spouting off all the outdated and overused memes you learned about on [[Ohinternet]].
6. Pretend to be BFFs with your daughters' most prominent [[stalkers|fans]] on [[Twitter]] while spouting off all the outdated and overused memes you learned about on [[KYM]].
<br>
<br>
7. Convince your daughter that its a good idea to participate in a shitty movie about [[Rick Roll|memes]] and [[Coppercab|youtube celebrities]] that only exists as a [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BRm01IruyWA 4 minute trailer on youtube] with no studio backing and a non-existent budget.
7. Convince your daughter that its a good idea to participate in a shitty movie about [[Rick Roll|memes]] and [[Coppercab|youtube celebrities]] that only exists as a [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BRm01IruyWA 4 minute trailer on youtube] with no studio backing and a non-existent budget.
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==Fun Facts==
==Fun Facts==
*[[FACT|Boxxmom began her maniacal quest for money after being fired from her day job as the stunt double and stand-in for Phyllis on NBC's The Office.]]
*[[Sounds legit|Boxxmom began her maniacal quest for money after being fired from her day job as the stunt double and stand-in for Phyllis on NBC's The Office.]]
*She posts on [[Catiechan]] with the [[namefag|tripcode]] !boxxmom.
*She posts on [[Catiechan]] with the [[namefag|tripcode]] !boxxmom.
*Her email is [email protected]. Have fun with it.
*Her email is [email protected]. Have fun with it.
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*Has earned herself a [[Youtube]] partnership, is [[so cash|pulling in the big bucks]], and still begs for money [[OTI|on the internet]] and tells people she is [[Lie|homeless]].
*Has earned herself a [[Youtube]] partnership, is [[so cash|pulling in the big bucks]], and still begs for money [[OTI|on the internet]] and tells people she is [[Lie|homeless]].
*[[USI|Post anything related to Boxxmom on Catiechan and expect the thread to be deleted within minutes]].
*[[USI|Post anything related to Boxxmom on Catiechan and expect the thread to be deleted within minutes]].
*[[Butthurt|Boxxmom tried unsuccessfully to have this page removed from the Google search results for 'Boxxmom'.]] [http://www.google.com/search?q=boxxmom Now look at how much that accomplished.]
*[[Butthurt|Boxxmom successfully had this page pushed from page one of the Google search results for 'Boxxmom' all the way to page three.]] [[GG| Gg fgt]]. [http://www.google.com/search?q=boxxmom The Jewish conspiracy moves forward unhindered.]
*Boxxmom is currently in the process of forcing Catie's [[loli|little sister]] onto [[Catiechan]] to maximize the profits.
*Boxxmom is currently in the process of forcing Catie's [[loli|little sister]] onto [[Catiechan]] to maximize the profits.
*[[Shit nobody cares about|After tigab protected anonimau5 from this control Nazi and got into an argument with her, she has made damn sure to make sure tigab is forgotten and shunned from the entire]] [[Gangbang|boxxysphere]].
*[[Shit nobody cares about|After tigab protected anonimau5 from this control Nazi and got into an argument with her, she has made damn sure to make sure tigab is forgotten and shunned from the entire]] [[Gangbang|boxxysphere]].
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Image:Boxxmom cocksucker.png|Lisa Wayne's next business venture caught on camera.
Image:Boxxmom cocksucker.png|Lisa Wayne's next business venture caught on camera.
Image:130610844182.jpg.jpeg|While pictures of Boxxdad still have yet to surface on the internet, [[some argue]] that this photo is an accurate portrayal.
Image:130610844182.jpg.jpeg|While pictures of Boxxdad still have yet to surface on the internet, [[some argue]] that this photo is an accurate portrayal.
Image:Aaa.png|The actions of a Jew caught on the [[internets]].
</gallery>|<gallery>
Image:Wut.jpg|Be nice to Boxxmom, or the [[you dun goofed|consequences will never be the same.]]
Image:Wut.jpg|Be nice to Boxxmom, or the [[you dun goofed|consequences will never be the same.]]
Image:Dolphin boxxmom.jpg|Did you ever buy an autographed photo from [[Boxxy|Catie Wayne]]? This is probably what your hard earned money ended up funding.
Image:Dolphin boxxmom.jpg|Did you ever buy an autographed photo from [[Boxxy|Catie Wayne]]? This is probably what your hard earned money ended up funding.
Image:Boxxmomlyingtweet.png|The only thing missing from this tweet was the hash tag [[Fact|#LyingWhore]].
Image:Boxxmomlyingtweet.png|The only thing missing from this tweet was the hash tag [[Fact|#LyingWhore]].
Image:Aaa.png|The actions of a Jew caught on the [[internets]].
Image:Soldout.png|[[Goodnight sweet prince|Rest well you generous basement dweller]], and know that Lisa Wayne has enough cheeseburgers to last her well into tomorrow evening.
Image:Soldout.png|[[Goodnight sweet prince|Rest well you generous basement dweller]], and know that Lisa Wayne has enough cheeseburgers to last her well into tomorrow evening.
</gallery>|<gallery>
Image:Beginningoftheend.png|And with one single tweet, Boxxmom kicks the family exploitation up another notch.
Image:Beginningoftheend.png|And with one single tweet, Boxxmom kicks the family exploitation up another notch.
Image:13061061369.jpg|After Boxxdad [[Pwned|dumped]] her sorry ass, Boxxmom wastes no time in finding Catie Wayne a new daddy.
Image:13061061369.jpg|After Boxxdad [[Pwned|dumped]] her sorry ass, Boxxmom wastes no time in finding Catie Wayne a new daddy.
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{{Whores}}
{{Whores}}
{{YoutubeSeries}}
{{chans}}
{{chans}}


[[Category:People]]
[[Category:People]]

Latest revision as of 04:34, 5 January 2015

THIS PAGE IS BEING WATCHED BY ENEMIES OF THE LULZ.
BEWARE OF BUTTHURT REVISIONISM.


Sometimes, the truth hurts.

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far, away some sweet jailbait decided to cake on the makeup and make some videos for her dumbass friends on Gaia. For years to come, basement dwellers and virgins the world over obsessed over the young girl we'd come to know as Catie Wayne while she remained in hiding from all the rape and murder that 4chan had to offer. Boxxy's mom was happy to help her daughter stay in hiding until the day she realized just how exploitable her daughter really was.

The Present

Enter 2010...

The world is a cold, cold, place as Boxxy graduates high school and fills her head with big dreams of New York City and Broadway. While her fat mother (Powerword: Lisa Wayne) was way too cheap to invest in own her daughter's future and too busy crying over being dumped by Boxxdad, the dollar signs grew in her eyes as she hatched a fail proof plan to bring in enough jewgolds for the Wayne family to live comfortably for years to come.

1. Force your daughter into the spotlight.
2. Try to sell her used stuff on eBay.
3. Once that doesn't work, make your daughter shit out a few new Youtube videos that are lackluster at best.
4. Work closely with your daughter in creating the shittiest website with the shittiest homepage evar, Catiewayne.com
5. Create your own YouTube channel, upload a few videos of Boxxy opening her birthday presents, and earn a YouTube partnership
6. Pretend to be BFFs with your daughters' most prominent fans on Twitter while spouting off all the outdated and overused memes you learned about on KYM.
7. Convince your daughter that its a good idea to participate in a shitty movie about memes and youtube celebrities that only exists as a 4 minute trailer on youtube with no studio backing and a non-existent budget.
8. Once enough cash has been acquired to live comfortably, disappear completely from the internet while still making your daughter post occasionally on Catiechan to keep her army of neckbeards satisfied.
9. ????
10. PROFIT!

Only time will tell where young Catie's journey will take her, but let it be known that whether Catie does make it as a bigtime Broadway star or hits rock bottom as the Sweet Eva of the twenty-first century, her Jew of a mother will be there to get her grubby hands on whatever monies she can.


Fun Facts

Gallery

I'm the exploiter you see!? About missing Pics
  • Straight from the horse's mouth.
    Straight from the horse's mouth.
  • Lisa Wayne's next business venture caught on camera.
    Lisa Wayne's next business venture caught on camera.
  • While pictures of Boxxdad still have yet to surface on the internet, some argue that this photo is an accurate portrayal.
    While pictures of Boxxdad still have yet to surface on the internet, some argue that this photo is an accurate portrayal.
  • The actions of a Jew caught on the internets.
    The actions of a Jew caught on the internets.
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]
  • Be nice to Boxxmom, or the consequences will never be the same.
    Be nice to Boxxmom, or the consequences will never be the same.
  • Did you ever buy an autographed photo from Catie Wayne? This is probably what your hard earned money ended up funding.
    Did you ever buy an autographed photo from Catie Wayne? This is probably what your hard earned money ended up funding.
  • The only thing missing from this tweet was the hash tag #LyingWhore.
    The only thing missing from this tweet was the hash tag #LyingWhore.
  • Rest well you generous basement dweller, and know that Lisa Wayne has enough cheeseburgers to last her well into tomorrow evening.
    Rest well you generous basement dweller, and know that Lisa Wayne has enough cheeseburgers to last her well into tomorrow evening.
  • And with one single tweet, Boxxmom kicks the family exploitation up another notch.
    And with one single tweet, Boxxmom kicks the family exploitation up another notch.
  • After Boxxdad dumped her sorry ass, Boxxmom wastes no time in finding Catie Wayne a new daddy.
    After Boxxdad dumped her sorry ass, Boxxmom wastes no time in finding Catie Wayne a new daddy.
  • How Boxxmom got her groove back.
    How Boxxmom got her groove back.
  • All your Boxxies belong to me.
    All your Boxxies belong to me.
  • STOP THE FUCKING PRESSES!!! SOMEONE'S BEING MEAN ON THE INTERNETS!!!!
    STOP THE FUCKING PRESSES!!! SOMEONE'S BEING MEAN ON THE INTERNETS!!!!
  • Boxxmom is currently in the process of creating an army of children to rake in the benjamins.
    Boxxmom is currently in the process of creating an army of children to rake in the benjamins.
  • Nothing is more sad than an old, dried up woman doing her best to impress the young whippersnappers of today by name dropping a punk musician who hasn't been relevant in decades.
    Nothing is more sad than an old, dried up woman doing her best to impress the young whippersnappers of today by name dropping a punk musician who hasn't been relevant in decades.
  • The brainwashing of her daughter's followers has already begun.
    The brainwashing of her daughter's followers has already begun.
  • Pic Related.
    Pic Related.
  • Wait until the authorities find Catie Wayne murdered and raped in the woods, and this will be what happens next.
    Wait until the authorities find Catie Wayne murdered and raped in the woods, and this will be what happens next.
  • Think she's gonna stop at America? Think again.
    Think she's gonna stop at America? Think again.
  • Rule 34 on the fat Jew.
    Rule 34 on the fat Jew.
  • An accurate portrait of Boxxmom.
    An accurate portrait of Boxxmom.

How To Properly Whore Your Daughter Out To The Internets

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See Also

External Links

Boxxmom is part of a series on

Whores

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Chans

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