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Rule 34

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If it exists, there is porn of it. No exceptions.


 


 
 

Rule 34

Predates the internet, possibly as far back as the 11th century.
Plane on plane porn. Brought to you by the death of 583 people.

The oft-cited observation from lore, Rule 34 has been proven beyond even the faintest doubts by fetishists, furries, infantilists, childhood-destroyers, and other horndogs in general, which is why it's proudly featured on brain-raping websites such as 4chan, 7chan, and Encyclopedia Dramatica.

On the most basic level, Rule 34 is the pornographic manifestation of even the most fucked up things imaginable as it states that "If It Exists, There Is Porn of It", thus the most important thing to understanding it is that it is never breakable (which is why Rule 34 is seemingly the only Rule of the Internet to actually apply). Instances can be real but usually range between hentai drawings by weeaboos or Photoshopped images. To facilitate your learning of the rule, we at ED shall take the liberty of breaking it down based on the quality, difficulty to find, and legitimacy of the pornography:

Variations

Type 1: Superb pornography

If you've been on the internet long enough, you know that specific characters, franchises, and even entire mediums are only popular because they offer plenty of fanservice, so it's no surprise that there's more pornography made of said things than there is made of others. So out of all that porn made, the quality of some of it ends up exceeding the quality of the thing it's based on, resulting in what we see here.

Nothing says "you have too much time on your hands" quite like being a good porn artist About missing Pics
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Note: Porn of this category is ironically the farthest thing from Rule 34, as Rule 34 states quantity not quality.

Type 2: Typical porn

Not all pornography is of an orgasmic quality; instead, most of it falls under this category. It's not the best, but by far is it the easiest to find. Go on any shitty porn site and we bet you'll find some.

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Type 3: Shitty porn

Since stupid things tend to become part of internet culture, them being 34'd is only natural. Unfortunately, the people who 34 them are the same unfunny, untalented idiots who popularized them in the first place (ex: Alexreynard, Chris-chan, DBoyWheeler, Eric W. Schwartz, Neomorphasis, Ray Jones, ReZ, and Urd-chan), thus here we have badly-done porn made of shit nobody cares about.

Behold, some of the stupidest porn you'll ever see in your life About missing Pics
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Type 4: The essence of Rule 34

Although porn of this category is undoubtedly the most difficult to find and it's not like any person would want to masturbate to it, it inflicts the impact that Rule 34 has on the internet. This category's level of sick fuckery and WTF makes it the pornography equivalent of shock sites as it bring much lulz at the dispense of other's brick shitting. Finding these requires great amounts of searching backwater porn sites and possibly several bumps of a thread but it's worth the shock value.

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Type 5: Instant Rule 34

On 10/08/08, a /b/tard decided to end all difficulties associated with Rule 34 on any subject thus created a template consisting of a penis, a mouth, and some semen. This instantly became popular with /b/ due to the fact that simply pasting it onto any image and moving it to juxtapose correctly would instantly 34 it. Threads exploded with never-before-seen Rule 34s of memes and, within moments, 10/08/08 became known as MEME RAEP Day.

Rule 34 lost a lot of value by the insane overuse of this simple, witless, hack, which did to Rule 34 what "Lolcats" did to "Caturday". Being of the worst quality, yet exploitable, this even made some think that perhaps there shouldn't be porn of some things. For the sake of not creating a category for every type of Shop, all shitty Photoshopped images that can be considered "porn" will fall under this one.

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Childhood Ruined

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See also

What's that? Your perverted ass wants more?

External links

4chanarchive
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to this topic. [CollapseClick for Links]


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Featured article June 16 & June 17, 2011
Preceded by
Dominique Strauss-Kahn
Rule 34 Succeeded by
Plushie