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Objectophilia

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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MOAR
Add pixplzkthnx to Objectophilia
Plz to be adding some pix now kthnx. Consult the image selection process for help, or just google up some pix.
Plz remove this notice once there are plenty of pix.
Objectophiliac: surprise exhaustsecks.

Objectophilia is all about having intercourse with different kinds of objects, such as inflatable animals, plush toys, women or cars. This is rule 34 to the max. Or even: Rule 41.

It is simply to be emotionally and sexually attracted to objects, not living matter. Object-sexual people believe that all things are living and having a soul. In other words, they are so horny that they would fuck anything that moves.

This rather rare sexual preference lacks images on teh interwebs so, should you happen across any, Upload that shit.

Objectophile Examples

STOP RIGHT THERE, FAGGOT!
ED does NOT need a huge list of absolute nobodies, nor does it give a shit about your petty forum feud with that bitch who doesn't agree with your Zutara OTP. Rather than spreading your butthurt vendetta over to this site, how about you read ED:101 and ED:A User's Guide to Article Building. And while you're at it, how about contributing to some actual drama you fucking idiot?
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Objectophiliacs love fire-fighters !

karnautrahl - thinks that happiness is a warm tailpipe. The Sun wrote a srsly lulz enducing article (which has sadly been baleeted) about him and his fiancees (a.o.: Lydia the 735i and Charlotte, the XJ6), also giving information about pavement-fucking electricians. He thinks "It's a simple, harmless fetish that does have the added bonus of screwing around with the heads of people who are 'too' straight or vanilla for their own good.". This is why he had custom tailpipes made for his tiny dick.

Eija-Riitta Eklöf-Berliner-Mauer - got very butthurt in 1989 and whines about it on her website. Besides that, she calls her husband the "best and sexiest wall ever existed". On her Webpage, she shows off selfmade Scale-Realdolls of her husband and her collection of guillotines (oh the irony). She's also into sexy fences.

Jew - does WTC (scale-models). Wonder how she has sex with them.

Relentless, X2C, Pipelaya, Pre$$ure, and Satisfaktion - Five niggers who were taught to write and use computers to share their objectophilia.

Sex with Cars

The most common sort of objectophilia is car fucking.

in ur garage, humpin' ur car

This FAQ about vehicular lovemaking has become quite known on teh intarwebs during the last years (at least if you're reading car forums):

  • The tailpipe isn't the only option!
  • Men can just use any orifice they can find
  • If you enjoy the body of a car, then licking, kissing, caressing and the normal actions of foreplay work well.
  • Lying on bodywork, with practice can be enjoyable, hot or cold.
  • Manual gearsticks can be fun for those inclined to allow the car to return the favour
  • For hardcore car lovers (trucks too), oily diffs, engines and tyres are an additional turn on.
  • Mixing fetishes can work with cars when used with imagination and care. Leather bondage can be fun too before or after serving the car.
  • Roleplay involving the car is another spice. Big or luxorious vehicles can be served, small sports cars dominated or switched around.

Car-fetishism also involves fanfic and is often combined with other fetishes, such as roleplay and bdsm (see the carsecks FAQ). Some hardcore carsexuals even taste the mechanical liquids of their cars (this might be a reason there are so few).

EDucational Video

Gallery de la fail

See Also

External Links


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