Registration has been disabled and the moderation extension has been turned off.
Contact an admin on Discord or EDF if you want an account. Also fuck bots.

Portal:Music/Featured Article/Archive

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
This is the current revision of this page, as edited by CrackRabbit (talk | contribs) at 16:38, 7 October 2024. The present address (URL) is a permanent link to this version.
(diff) ← Older revision | Latest revision (diff) | Newer revision → (diff)
Jump to navigation Jump to search
<Portal:Music/Featured Article
Newest to oldest articles

September 2023

Featured Article - Roger Waters
Roger Waters

Roger Waters (Powerword: George Roger Waters) is the second, and best, leader of Pink Floyd who took his place as the front man for the group after Syd Barrett suicidaly poured a half-liter of liquid LSD into his bathwater and decided it'd be fun to see what it would be like to deep fry his brain, or at least that's what the Urban legends say.

He is best known by Trendy Fuckers like you for songs like Another Brick In The Wall Part 2, or more popularly known by you as- We Don't Need No Education because you can't be bothered with learning the songs real name and you only download what's currently popular and your Hipster ass knows nothing about the albums and could care less that Another Brick In The Wall has 3 parts. We'll take a wild guess and bet that Comfortably Numb, Money and Brain Damage/Eclipse are on your playlist and really the only Floyd songs that you know.

Then there's the songs you've never heard because they're not as popular and your trendy group doesn't talk about them. Unlike the previously mentioned songs - these don't make it to the trending lists or have been recently used in a movie or TV show and for all your fussing and Bitching about the mega-corporate-overlords using Delta Waves and hypnotic suggestion to control your brains you'll let corporate America pick your music for you Shitshoveler. This means you've never heard Shine On You Crazy Diamond, Welcome To The Machine and Pigs:Three Different Kinds despite calling yourself a "hardcore" Floyd Fan. Even more, the more obscure and early works are completely lost on you. If we were to start talking about Floyd's more obscure works such as One Of These Days or Set The Controls For The Heart Of The Sun we might as well be trying to explain the singularity of a Black Hole while you polish your drool cups.

Recently Roger Waters has caused mega Butthurt with Berlin and Israel over his 2023 concert This Is Not A Drill because they're saying that his hammer logo that he's been "only" using for only 40+ years is now, all of a sudden, offensive and looks like a Swastika.

More so, Jewish groups who want the world to forget about the 13 million people that died along with the 6 Million Jews in the Holocaust so they can make the Holocaust their own, took offense to Waters using Anne Frank's name, most likely because it preceeded Shireen Abu Akleh, a veteran Palestinian-American journalist who was killed May 2023 by Israeli soldiers during a shootout with Palestinian militants.

And so, let us take a look at all Waters' recent drama...

(( ROGER WATERS ))

May 2023

Featured Article - Meme Rap
Meme Rap

In an ever-evolving society, there are often instances of two entities coming together and producing an unexpected, original movement (whether that be for the better or worse). While that in itself is fine, there are the occasional bastardizations of both pieces of the pair that should never exist. Ever.

In this case study we will focus on the recent trend of ironic and/or meme rap music.

(( MEME RAP ))

February 2023

Featured Article - Neutral Milk Hotel
Neutral Milk Hotel

Neutral Milk Hotel is the worst band you've probably never heard of. Universally loved by hipsters it is the source of much butthurt among music enthusiasts who prefer more refined musicians such as Tyler the Creator. The band is most famous for their release of the album In the Aeroplane Over the Sea, an album expressing lead singer and songwriter Jeff Mangum's misguided love for hide-and-seek champion Anne Frank. This album is considered a cult-classic among entry-level hipsters, and merely posting the album cover is a sure-fire way to troll the denizens of 4chan's /mu/.

(( ITAOTS TURNS 25 iN '23 ))

July 2022

Featured Article - Backmasking
Backmasking

Backmasking is a technique artists use to add hidden messages to their music which can be discovered by listening to music backwards. This is rumored to be the only real way of finding messages from Satan himself and the KFC Colonel's secret recipe of 11 Herbs and Spices. Perhaps this is the only good way of listening to modern music.

(( TURN ME ON DEAD MAN ))

May 2022

Featured Article - Goth
Goth

Goths (Gawths, Goffs, Gawff) are a self-aggrandizing bunch of attention whores, whose special talent is enjoying attention while pretending to disdain it. They especially revel in posturing to incite insult, so that they can say something deep and angsty. The elitist kick they get from this is visible under their pasty pale skin. If under some circumstance the color of something other than skin is in question, assume it's black.

Evolutionary social scientists postulate that the Goth represents an early nocturnal bifurcation from the Greb or Greebo lineage, due to its similar preponderance of black clothing, leather, and spikes. However, this pussying-out from the well-established and resilient parent lifeform left Goths unfitted to the niche of moping around miserably in black, which has now been filled by the Emo subspecies. It seems inevitable, therefore, that Goths will become extinct within decades unless new breeding colonies are established.

(( MAY 22 IS "WORLD GOTH DAY" ))

December 2021

Featured Article - R. Kelly
R. Kelly

R. Kelly (Powerword: Robert Sylvester Kelly) is a now disgraced American artist once praised by his 'people' and vaguely gay music critics as "the king of R&B" ("Rapists & Blacks") before the inevitable collapse of his underground Africunny empire and subsequent capture.

Back in the 1990s, this man's 'music' and uniquely high-pitched singing voice was the soundtrack to many a lonely nights' masturbating in the bedroom with lights off. Every time one of his generic songs came on, teenage girls tended to turn into nymphomaniacs, and then proceeded to get raped by anyone within spitting distance. This turned out to be his very intention as it was later revealed he was using his music to sonically groom young girls into becoming his personal piss napkins.

(( FOUND "GUILTY", FINALLY, AS OF 2021 ))

July 2020

Featured Article - Kanye West
Kanye West

Kanye West aka Yeezy, Ye, (or whatever else he's currently calling himself) is an American rapper, designer and actual 2020 USA Presidential candidate.

Born in Atlanta, Georgia, and raised in Chicago, on the playground is where he spent most of his younger days; Chillin out maxing and relaxing all cool and all shooting some b-ball outside of the school...

Srsly though, West was raised in Chicago, and grew up around gangbangers and playas. We don't have much to say about his young adulthood years since that's BORING SHIT, LOL.

Kanye West has been at the forefront of much IRL and internet drama, and as a result we here at Encyclopedia Dramatica are humbly taking on the vital public service of explaining his discography, musical career and personal life to plebians such yourself. "Yeezus just rose again..."

(( "KANYE 2020" LOL ))

October 2018

Featured Article - Abbey Road
Abbey Road

Abbey Road, released 26 September 1969 is the 11th album released by the Beatles. It is the last album that all the Beatles participated on before they all got sick and tired of John Lennon's villanous, Japanese, greedy souled, backstabbing Waifu Yoko Ono trying to run the show and broke up just after their final album Let It Be released. The album is mostly known for the George Harrison megahit Something and the Timothy Leary inspired song Come Together by John Lennon that is probably better known by most as a cover from Aerosmith.

Musically it is well received but it is best known for starting the pre-internet IRL meme of people visiting England and recreating the iconic album cover to send home to friends and family as a postcard when the pictures were developed. More recently it is known for all the butthurt One Direction started with Beatles fans when they copied the classic album cover in 2015 and claimed that they were "More Popular Than The Beatles".
Get it. In a March 1966 interview with The London Evening Standard John Lennon claimed "The Beatles Were More Popular Than Jesus" so by saying One Direction is more popular than the Beatles you are saying they are ultimately more popular than Jesus. Such clever word play.

You don't need to know the Beatles to know the Abbey Road Meme because the Abbey Road album cover instantly became a meme in 1969 when the Album was first released because of the simplicity and candidness of the image. Anyone could have taken it. It's another one of those images like Eddie Adams' award winning photograph Saigon Execution that has been burnt into our collective psyche.


(( "CUM TOGETHER, RIGHT NOW." ))

July 2014

Featured Article - Vaporwave
Vaporwave

Vaporwave may or may not exist as an established art form or means of expression. Vaporwave works against itself to provide entertainment; the boundaries of irony are irrelevant here.

Vaporwave is said to be inspired by or similar to "sea-punk," however this is up in the air. The concept of Vaporwave is often considered to be commentary on the inevitable collision of corporate commercialism with what many consider pop culture, although this is ALREADY HAPPENING with corporations trying to hijack memes for commercial purposes OTI. Most Vaporwave consists of chopped and screwed 80s music, and slowed down elevator music that only hipsters would listen to otherwise. Popular Vaporwave artists include laserdisc visions, Vektroid, and MACINTOSH PLUS, who all happen to be the same person.

(( TRYING TO SELL YOU THINGS, BUT YOU AIN'T BUYYYYING ))

April 2014

Featured Article - Rap Genius

RapGenius.com rapgenius, formerly known as RapExegesis.com is the result after Wikipedia' s and Post-it-mark's heated unprotected lovemaking session. This unholy bastardization would grow into Rap Geniusfounded in 2009 by a group of Yale trustfunders during the height of an Adderall binge. Rap Genius presents itself as a self-declared guide to "the meaning of rap, R&B, and soul lyrics" which allows anyone to provide their explanations of popular hip-hop song lyrics. In addition to hip-hop and rap, Rap Genius later created sections dedicated to deciphering rock and poetry from at least 100 years ago. The sites worst enemy is the userbase itself which exclusively consists of furries. They have merely filled their lives with BDSM jiffing so it is only expected that they overanalyze or completely misinterpret what successful artists have to say.

(( RAP GENIUS ))

February 2014

Featured Article - Ian Watkins

Ian Watkins (aka Ian Wantkids) is a pedophilic, bisexual sheepfucker and former lead-vocalist of hipster outfit Lostprophets. Despite a relatively successful music career Watkins was unable to suppress the demons that lurked deep within his psyche so embarked upon on a prolonged mission to abuse as many children as he could persuade mentally unstable female members of his fanbase to afford him access to. His popularity allowed him to escape justice for some considerable time but in the end his public downfall inevitably came and he was brutally exposed as having conspired with others to insert his penis into the rectum of a 1 year old boy.

(( IAN WATKINS))

December 2013

Featured Article - Lexus Amanda

Alexis Amanda Joice, commonly known as Lexus Amanda, is a "musician" who is mostly known for her relationships with men in popular bands. She gained internet popularity after getting into a relationship with the bassist of the band Escape The Fate Max Green. She is also well known for scamming her fans.

(( LEXUS AMANDA ))

May 2013

Featured Article - Audiosurf

Audiosurf is a game that simulates the effects of the drug, LSD. The main point of Audiosurf is to basically "ride" the music that you listen to. The game automatically graphs out how the song will be and calculates how hard it will be. Then, after the level is completed, the score will be posted on the scoreboards. This causes much drama due to the amount of cheaters that mess up the scores for everyone. The top songs that have been played to recently are by the Jewness Brothers and Dragonforce.

The developers of the game were so arrogant about the game that they named their team of developers "BestGameEver". This is misleading though due to the amount of fail the game has.

(( AUDIOSURF ))

April 2013

Featured Article - Nicki Minaj

Nicki Minaj is an over-privileged plastic Negress who is consistently given hundreds of millions of dollars for absolutely no other reason than being a puppet of the entertainment industry. This abomination of a human being is essentially a black Lady Gaga but with even less talent and a somehow worse fashion sense.

(( WILD NICKI MINAJ APPEARED ))