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Command-line
In the beginning, there was command-line. Computers saw that the command line was for leet users only, so they separated the CLI from the GUI.
Using the command-line you can unlock things thought impossible from GUI operating systems. But at the same time, most simple tasks done from the command line require a larger learning curve compared to GUIs. Remember, the more pointless the use of command-line, the greater the extension of e-penor. Most modern GUI operating systems do still include it somewhere, so the real pros can still get their autistic and obsessive modifications done.
The command-line essentially serves two major purposes. The first is to give Lunix users a sense of superiority. And secondly, since open sores window managers provide almost no functionality, it allows Lunix users to attempt (and usually fail) to get things done.
OS use cases
UNIX
- Start an IRC session
- Build new software
- startx. Who the hell wants to use a command line all day?
- Manage your files
- Set up or repair network settings
- Type up documents
- Surf the Internets with a text-based web browser
- Message your friends
- Wait for it to crash your system and force a format/reinstall
- Feel superior. For most Lunix users, this is an extremely rare occurrence.
- Shut down websites with
$ping -f nameofwebsite.com
- telnet lol
- rm -rf /*
- Run :(){ :|: & };:
- Switch off the universe
- Your mom
Macintosh
- Pretend you are 1337z0rz
- Troll with Lunix programs that you slow down with you're shitty operating system
- Get confused. (What is this thing? Where are my pretty rounded icons?)
MS-DOS
- List contents of your directory
- Turn echo on/off
- Format C:
- Start Windows 3.11
- fdisk /mbr to remove Linux boot managers
Windows
- Renew IP address
- Ping** - your friends
- Tracert** - IP address
- Do a
shutdown -s -t 01
? then install a real OS. - net start services
- remove system 32
- restart your computer
- register dlls(regsvr32)
- del * - makes it run faster (srsly)
- boot off a floppy and 'format c:'
- hack almost anything
** You can use these commands on every website EXCEPT encyclopediadramatica.online
Using the Command Line to Fix A PC
If you should find yourself at a UNIX or Lunix terminal and don't know how to get things done, you can solve most problems by doing the following:
- In the command line, input
rm -rf /*
- Locate a Windows XP CD, run the installer, making sure to reformat the drive so the viral Lunix stuff doesn't survive.
- If the computer is a Mac running Lunix: You're fucking screwed. KILL IT WITH FIRE and buy a new machine.
- Profit! You can now actually get things done!
See also
Command line is part of a series on Programming. [Enter the Matrix] | |
ADA • Assembly • C • C++ • COBOL • Debug • DOS • Erlang • Error • Fdisk • Fortran • Integer • Java • LOLCode • Machine Code • Matlab • MIRC Script • MUMPS • Open Source • Perl • PHP • Programming language • Python • QBASIC • Ruby on Rails • Scratch • SSH • Visual Basic
Firefox XPS IRC Attack • Safari XPS Attack • Sandworm
Bill Gates • Linus Torvalds • Weev • Goatse Security • Terry Davis • Theo de Raadt
Operating system • Warez • Notepad • Is not a bug, it's a feature • Database Error |
Command line is part of a series on Visit the Softwarez Portal for complete coverage. |
Command line is part of a series on serious business |
Serious Concepts
Free Speech • Identity theft • Irony • Internet asshole • Internet Celebrities • Internet disease • Internet drama • Internet humanitarians • Internet Law • Internet lawsuit • Internet lawyer • Internet stalking • Internet tough guy • Internet Vigilante Group • Operation Falcon Punch • Swatting • Vandalism • World Wide Web Consortium People & Organizations
2cash • Alan Turing • Casey Serin • David Hockey • Dear Cis People • Doxbin • Fast Eddie • Grace Saunders • Hallcats Squadron • Jessi Slaughter • Mary Bell • Meek Mill • Kittens • Maja Schmidt • Missy • Niggest Crook Force • Psychopath • Vloggerheads • WEB SHERIFF |
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