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The Tails Realm
The Tails Realm is a website dedicated to the two-tailed, turd-brown faggot from Sonic the Hedgehog, Miles "Tails" Prower, that no one gives a fuck about except depressed fourteen year-olds who get the crap beat out of them by preschoolers, nuns and/or Donny Osmond. They idolize Tails; he is their role model and their means of "mental stability." While you'd expect them to have all committed suicide or get smacked to death by a shoe, they've all huddled into a little site that's been under construction for the past 100 years. Also be aware that The Tails Realm mods and admins will ban you on sight if you aren't a ZOMFG TAILZ FAN 4 LYF!!!!
Cauda homosexualis retardi (The Tails Fan)
The Cauda homosexualis retardi or Tails Fan, is generally a shy and unsocial creature with unsophisticated qualities in relation to asininity. While at first it appears docile, it at heart, is not. When provoked, (usually by saying "Tails is gay"), it will irrationally respond with nonsensical ramblings about how it sucks to be you, and that Tails is great and it wants to have his babies. Consider the physical characteristics of the Tails fan. The stereotypical look is large pimply foreheads, braces with yellow teeth, and a short haircut traced with a salad bowl. If you believe this to be incorrect, you are mistaken. It is difficult to tell the Tailstards apart, physically and personality wise. Some tend to believe Tails exists in an alternate dimension. (No, I am not kidding. Some actually believe that.) These deluded creatures create sacred shrines composed entirely of binary code to what they believe to be their God (Tails).
Instead of performing sacrificial ceremonies to honor Tails, they find it customary to copulate with plushies of him. Scientists believe that this is a way for the Tails fan to find a secret inner peace within themselves. These Tails fans who grab their ankles for their God have been named Animal anthropomorphus. Also known as simply, "The Furry."
The language of the Tails fan is composed of a total of five words. They are: "Love, kawaii, cute, adorable, and Tails." The language is known as "Idiot." To speak Idiot, all you must do is combine all five words into an almost functioning sentence such as this: "Love Tails; kawaii, adorable, cute!" Most Tails fans will say that same sentence like this: "lUv TaiLes: KAWA!!, @duRiBle, CuT!!!!!!!111" Scientists believe they are attempting to invoke their Lord's presence with these sacred chants from the alternate dimension we mentioned earlier.
If you encounter one of these strange humans it is suggested you attack them. Despite protection by the US goverment, they still deserve to die.
You might think Tails fans live in colonies or packs. Surprisingly, they do not. They are solitary creatures, gathering to meet only for breeding and to recount tales of Tails, told by the lucky ones, chosen at random as Avatar for the day. Although they gather frequently to breed, they seldom produce viable young because they always end up masturbating to their God.
An Assload of Pink
The Tails Realm has been under construction for at least 100 years, and fortunately, it shows no sign of progress; however, there are a total of two things a Tails fag can do on here--click a button to give out hugs or go to an invisionfree forum enveloped in a bright pink background that makes the gay pride parades envious. As expected,
there isn't much to talk about on the forum other than what kind of dress Tails would look best in or make up emo fan characters which successfully out-gay Shadow.
Tips on Getting Banned
- Provide negative criticism on fan characters.
- Provide negative criticism on Tails.
- Provide negative criticism on the banner.
- Provide negative criticism on the background color.
- Provide negative criticism on fan fictions.
- Spell Tails' name backwards.
- Say that Tails does not exist and never will.
- Say that Tails is dead.
- Do what 006/Storm did
Tails fags have low tolerance for any criticism that could be considered constructive. If any appears negative, the assumption is that a hater is trying to cause havoc. Then, these estrogen-intoxicated man-fairies will get infuriated, ban you, and then cut themselves while singing along to Tails' Theme from Sonic Adventure 2.
Notable Members
- Aaron- Original owner of the forum. It (Aaron is a transvestite) decided to leave. Good choice.
- AugieD- A fucktard who bans everyone.
- .Axl Darkix- A kid who met KK at a Yu-Gay-Ho! tournament. They fell madly in love after KK's sex change. He was pissed after she moved to California and became a depressed idiot.<--(A redundancy)
- Flyboy Fox- Believes that Sonic and Tails exist in another reality. Also owner of SonTails, a website composed entirely of gay Rainbow Blinkies. Used to be an admin but left due to butthurt but now is an admin at bigger, faggier Sonic site called The Sonic Stadium Has later been revealed to be an Otakukin.
- Leon Kennedy- Has a fear of crossing the street. He thinks that drivers will intentionally run him over. This could be as a result of traumatic experiences playing Frogger as a youth.
- F***Un00bs- A fucktarded basement-dwelling troll on TTR who got banned in less than an hour. He is a /b/tard and a fag. His lifelessness was caused by him surrendering his soul to Michael Jackson when he was 8 to prevent himself from being raped or from having Tourette's. He knows TheProwerFanFicer from camp and being a Jackson drone, and has a lot of sleepovers with him. He says he does it for the lulz
- Galener the fox mage- A Dr. Who geek who should have been EX-TER-MIN-ATED by a Dalek. He lives in his basement.
- General Mudkip- A "troll" who came to talk about ED on TTR after a topic Joyo Posted. One of The ED Saviors who got banned for your sins.
- JoyoPrower- Fucking moron who hopped on the "I HAVE ASS BURGERS SO I'M SMART LOL" fad. Hates ED and Germans with a passion. He had this to say on youtube about Encyclopedia Dramatica and the creator of the Tails Realm article: [1]
- Kawaii Kitsune- A 50 year-old fag with a shitty name. She used to be a man, but she liked a straight guy that she met at a Yu-gay-ho tournament so she got a sex change. Her real name is Kevin. She's also a real pain in the ass. HATES OREOS!!1111!1ONEONE FGSFDS ASDF
- RoSe-BuSTeR- 22 year-old asswipe who owns The Tails Realm.
- Storm- Some loser who thinks he is mysterious and cool. He destroys sites for the lulz. He joined the troll side on JewTube. Disappeared off the face of the Earth.
- TheProwerFanFicer- (AKA TehProwerFagFucker) A furry-fucking bisexual kike who gets his ass kicked by 8-year old girls, then gets raped by them every day. He is a pussy who can't get enough of his favorite show, Cardcaptor Sakura. He joined because he liked KK's fucking gay fanfics. People are surprised he is accepted on TTR. He adopts virtual pets from weird sites and fucks them. He also jacks off to pics of a sexy girl with the head of some idiot in his school. His picture ...[2]
- Anyone on the top 10 posters list is or was a fag with no life.
- Everyone else is also dumb.
Drama
This article has ostensibly achieved almost instantaneous fame on The Tails Realm. The controversy it created is quite a read. Feel the lulz.
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Gotta love it.
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Usually passions include either music, science, literature, drawing...you know...something productive. This jackass is a 21 year-old guy who has a passion for a video game character who everyone hates. So, what can you do with such a passion?
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You should feel special. Enough people took the time out of their day to tell you that your name sucks.
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Well, you see...if the government did that dear, then they would be violating the Constitution's First Amendment.
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I kanna handle it Cap'n! The powuh! The powuh tis too strong!
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Good luck on that livejournal article. I hope you don't overuse too many smilies; however, ED has a lot more on you than you have on ED. For example, you have a Final Fantasy VII fanfic. You're also a Tails fan, and you have a fan character recoloration of Tails...and of all things the poor guy is purple.
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Listen to the interdimensional believer. Underneath its deluded philosophies, there rests a spark of sagacious veracity that's not so sagacious afterall. It turned out to be packing peanuts.
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More drama. Also I DON'T CARE, THAT'S WHY I MADE A LIVEJOURNAL POST.
Conclusion
A fanmade pic from Tails Realm. The picture is inspired by the gay porn movie The bigger the better in which Peter North get bottomed by Rick Donovan. Yasushi Yamaguchi, the japanese retard who made up tails, said in an interview that Tails is indeed gay, he was surprised that this was not clear
External Links
- The Tails Realm
- Their new forum The Tailsfags are moving to a different forum soon
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The Tails Realm is part of a series on Visit the Furfaggotry Portal for complete coverage. |