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User:Schnookums
Sweep & Mop
Main Page
Current Threat
Article of the Now
Suicide is not the only way out of this earthly pilgrimage to eternity.
Let's be truthful here; you decided to see this page because you're depressed, or someone linked you here because they know what a waste of oxygen you are, or you just discovered gay dog porn exists, or you have been raped by Sharjah ruler Mossad friends when you were in 7th grade after being told to go to a small room by an affiliated teacher and there is nothing you can do because Sheikh Sultan is over the law. Your life is shit and you are seeking some kind of psychological sympathetic buttsex to encourage you to continue living on about your pathetic, meaningless, sorry ass excuse of a life...
Well, guess what, dear? If that is what you were looking for, then you have come to the right site. We're here to help!
Or if you have some friend or loved one who's feeling so down and low that they feel they cannot go on any longer, please send them the link to this page. It could give them some encouraging insight on their decision.
With all of that said, we would kindly ask that you'd please pay attention closely...
The brave act of suicide is a process of moral redemption. If you dispel the surface pleasantries in your life for long enough to realize your utter irrelevance and worthlessness, you will immediately see that the only solution lies in the absolute and irreversible pwnage of yourself IRL, in which you may, if you're lucky, become an hero to those still dwelling in the real world and, for the first (and only) time in your life, achieve something of worth. It is the equivalent of flipping over the Monopoly board. Contrary to popular belief, this also stops you from posting online. You will achieve an Hero status immediately through suicide.
| Ae-tan 2 days ago |
Azn 4 days ago |
Randy Robert Stair 6 days ago | |
Video of the Now
Picture of the Now
Quote of the Now
—Bob Dylan | ||
Did You Know...
- ... that the Internet Archive got haxxored recently, not once, but twice? (See 31 million of you on HIBP!)
- ... that a Trump sign started a shoot out in Las Vegas?
- ... that the 2024 USA Presidential Elections are now in full swing? Feel free to document teh election dramaz accordingly, as it is dished out!
- ... that
Doge has died? - ... that Iran's president has died in a helicopter crash?
- ... that encyclopediadramatica.online died because the new owner hid like a bitch and let it die? Spread the word about edramatica.com
- ... rapper P Diddy has been arrested and denied bail?
- ... that encyclopediadramatica.win died (FOR REAL THIS TIME AS OF OCTOBER 4, 2024, PUT ON CLIENTHOLD BY CLOUDFLARE), all .win refugees are welcome to join the REAL ED
- ... that Liam Payne ( The One Direction Faggot) died in Argentina after falling from a balcony; If it was an attempt at being an hero is unknown.
Current Threat
- January
New Year's Day (1st) • Martin Luther King, Jr. Day (3rd Monday)
- February
Valentine's Day (14th)
- March
Saint Patrick's Day (17th) • World Bipolar Day (30th)
- April
April Fools' Day (1st) • ED Rebirth Day (15th) • An Hero Day (20th) • 420 Day (20th)
- May
Star Wars Day (4th) • Mother's Day (2nd Sunday) • World Goth Day (22nd)
- June
Autistic Pride Day (18th) • Father's Day (3rd Sunday)
- July
Independence Day (4th)
- August
Friendship Day (4th) • Women's Equality Day (26th)
- September
Labor Day (1st Monday) • 9/11 (11th) • International Talk Like a Pirate Day (19th)
- October
World Animal Day (4th) • National Cat Day (29th) • Halloween (31th)
- November
Veterans Day (11th) • OldDirtyBtard (17th) • Thanksgiving (4th Thursday)
- December
World AIDS Day (1st) • Encyclopaedia Dramatica (10th) • Christmas Eve (24th) • Christmas Day (25th) • Kwanzaa (Dec 26th-Jan 1st) •
New Year's Eve (31st)Copypasta
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Alamo
Kligzward • Honest Abe • Motor Oil • Annatar Scott • Sony Vegas • WikiShitizens
Adopted weasel
Friendly observer
On the forums I am a neutral observer who is loved by all. I take great pride in what I do.
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This happens when I am mistaken for a shitposter. -
I work 14 hours a day. It isn't easy but I always smile. -
Sometimes I take a break. -
Miscellaneous
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My great-great-grandfather proudly defended the lulz. -
Editing the wiki. -
OMG
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Summer -
Winter -
Now it's personal. -
These berries... so delicious. -
Go away. -
It's on! -
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- You were a newb at some point.
So help others achieve greatness.
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SIEG HEIL BANN STAR! This user is a member of the
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Schnookums is part of a series on Visit the Furfaggotry Portal for complete coverage. |
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#MEEPCREW PRIDE WORLD WIDE :^) This user has proven their worth to ED under the guidance of the holy Pope Meepsheep and has been named an honorary member of the prestigious #Meepcrew. As a result, they will likely show excessive love for catgirls, admiration of Lil B, undying support of the black homosexual community, Adventure Time avocation, and rampant Pynchon fanboyism. Keep in mind they are your intellectual superior, but you can be this cool too someday! Please enable them with channel ops and powerful hallucinogens at all opportunities. |
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Schnookums
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